Author Archives: gonelikeashadowatevening

Bible, Child Raising, Child Rearing, Disciplemaking, Encouragement, Family, Fatherhood, God's Will, Holy Spirit, Inspirational, Love, Mentoring, Modeling, Parenting, Praise, Women

YOU GOTTA LOVE

TITUS 2:4

“so that they may encourage the young women to love their husbands, to love their children,”

Oh, what a beautiful word we have today in this verse. And like many words the Holy Spirit inspired Paul to use, the Greek word for “encourage” is only used right here in Titus 2:4. This word gives the picture of passing on to someone else what the Lord reveals is true balance. It has to do with discovering and living out His will.

Now, look at what that is in this verse. She is to encourage them to love their husbands and their children. And if this verb’s definition holds, they are to love each in a balanced way. Why do I bring that up? Because too many women put their children way before their husbands. It has to be balanced, ladies. Your love for your husbands must not fall below your love for your children. You are a team, and it must be balanced.

APPLICATION

“Well, my husband knows I love him.” Really, how many times have you put your child before your husband in the past week? Now, hear me out. I’m not trying to make you feel guilty. There are times you have to put the child first and hubby has to come along and help. But oftentimes the child’s schedule dictates the marital relationship.

How about you two scheduling some time just for you. It doesn’t have to be a date outside the home. It could just be 10 minutes to talk. And, depending on the age of your children, let them know this is daddy-mommy time. I promise they will learn to respect it and appreciate it. It shows them you have a commitment to each other which makes them feel secure.

I don’t want to leave you dads out today, though. This can happen on your side as well. You can’t spend all your free time with Johnny on the ballfield and neglect your wife’s needed time with you. Balance is the key. Make sure she WANTS to spend time with you. And then blow her socks off with an unexpected gift or praise.

Father, thank You for giving us children to love and spouses to partner together. Help me to love my wife only as You can through me. The love of Christ is all I want to share.

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Bible, Child Raising, Child Rearing, Disciplemaking, Encouragement, Inspirational, Mentoring, Modeling, Obedience, Parenting, Qualifications, Testimony

SACRED

TITUS 2:3

“Older women likewise are to be reverent in their behavior, not malicious gossips nor enslaved to much wine, teaching what is good,”

Women, did you know you are supposed to be sacred? Yep, that’s what this verse says. The Greek word for “reverent” come from two Greek words – “temple” and “fitting.” In other words, your behavior should be like that, fitting a temple or sacred place.

But what does that mean? Most of us have never been in a temple. And many of our churches today or designed with such a contemporary feel that the reverence that used to be attributed to it just isn’t there. This reverent, this sacred behavior refers to our behavior, wherever we are. In fact, the two Greek words used here, “reverent” and “behavior” are only used right here in the New Testament. Reverence does not depend on where we are. It depends on how we live.

APPLICATION

Do you want reverent kids? I don’t mean they walk around wearing little suits or dresses, quoting the Bible in the KJV all the time. I am talking about children who seek to glorify the Lord in their every action. Who doesn’t want that? Children learn to be reverent by observing reverence. You, mom and dad, must portray the kind of God-honoring behavior that exemplifies it.

We teach our children to be sacred and reverent by our everyday actions. How do you treat the waitress who messes up your order? How do you respond to an unkind word from a cashier at the store? How do you react in traffic when someone cuts you off? Your children are watching all these reactions. Teach them how to be reverent in every situation.

Did this hit you hard? Join the club. But aren’t you thankful the Word convicts us? Aren’t you glad the Lord does let us get away with this stuff? We are influencing people everyday by our behaviors. Let your mind dwell on Him so that all you do glorifies Him today.

I am so far from doing this right, Lord. But my desire is to do it. I want others to see You in me in everything I do.

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Bible, Child Raising, Child Rearing, Commands, Faith, Love, Modeling, Parenting, Scripture, Testimony

A REAL MAN

TITUS 2:2

“Older men are to be temperate, dignified, sensible, sound in faith, in love, in perseverance.”

Today there is a lot of debate about what a man should be. Should he be more in touch with his feelings and show more emotion or should he be more macho and manly? Well, right here in today’s verse we have a perfect definition of a godly man. Paul gives us six ways to identify a real man.

He is first temperate (not under the influence of outside sources). He is to be dignified (has the respect of others). He is to be sensible (have control of his behavior). And then Paul says he should be sound (in good shape) in regards to faith, love and perseverance. Wow! Is this all possible? In Christ it is.

APPLICATION

How do you make this verse applicable to your children? By teaching them all these principles. We want all our children to be protected from outside influences. Therefore, insulate them with God’s Word. We want them all to be well respected by others. That comes from showing respect and living lives that earn respect. And, of course, we want them all to be sensible, which really means to be self-controlled.

As parents, we are to help our children’s faith grow, to help them learn to love others as Christ does and to learn to persevere under hard times. All three of those will make them healthier Christians, which is what the word “sound” implies. We get our word “hygiene” from it. Healthy faith, healthy love and healthy perseverance. Hmmm, I could use some of that myself.

So, how do you measure up, dad? Are you a real man? But hold on, mom. These are applicable to you, too. Do you exemplify these traits? Our goal should always to be more and more like Christ. Our goal should be perfection. We will never achieve perfection, of course, but Jesus is our model of a real man. Strive to live like Him and point towards Him always.

O Lord, give me these traits today as I live my life for You. I want others to only see You as they look at me. May my every action and word draw them to You.

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Advice, Bible, Child Raising, Child Rearing, Parenting, Scripture

THAT’S FITTING

TITUS 2:1

“But as for you, speak the things which are fitting for sound doctrine.”

What does “that’s fitting” mean? You’ve probably heard someone say that. I have even said things like “that’s just fittin’ to eat.” Well, the Greek word is only used seven times and has the idea of proper or suitable. It’s the right thing at the right time. Now, that’s important to understand.

Paul is telling Titus, as we look at chapter two today, that he, unlike the folks he just finished talking about in chapter one, needs to teach correctly. But not only that. He needs to teach the right thing correctly at the right time. There is a time and place for every doctrine. Make sure you are teaching what the Lord is directing you when He says to and not just teach what you want to teach.

APPLICATION

If your children are struggling with relationships, it does no good to teach them eschatology (the study of end times). It they are struggling with their salvation, now is not the time to dig into a lengthy discussion on ecclesiology (the study of the church). Teach appropriately. And no child wants to be lectured in doctrines. They want it fleshed out and applicable.

How do you do that? Through life lessons. Did you know you can teach ecclesiology by talking about your own church? You can talk about Pastor Smith and Deacon Jones and other church leaders and how they lead the body. You can talk about the passage where Jesus told Peter He will build the church on the rock (Himself). Doctrines are so important to teach our kids. Why? Because they are the bedrock of our faith and are based fully and completely on His Word.

If you struggle understanding the key doctrines of Christianity, find a good resource you can trust. There are plenty out there. I am not going to suggest any here so as to not offend any of my other denominational friends. I am Southern Baptist, so I will teach accordingly. Whatever your church affiliation, make sure your doctrines align with His Word and then teach them diligently.

Above all, Lord, help me teach Your Word truthfully and completely. Give me insight into Your deep truths so I can relate those to others. Hep me lay the foundation of faith for others to build upon.

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Advice, Bible, Child Raising, Child Rearing, Deception, Disciplemaking, Encouragement, Eternity, Holy Spirit, Lies, Mentoring, Modeling, Obedience, Parenting, Testimony

PRETENDERS

TITUS 1:16

“They profess to know God, but by their deeds they deny Him, being detestable and disobedient and worthless for any good deed.”

Don’t you just hate people who pretend to be one thing but aren’t? Hate is really too strong a word. We shouldn’t hate anyone, except Satan. But pretenders are very hard to like, much less love. Paul had undoubtedly dealt with some of these folks through the years. He is now warning Titus to be careful. They say they know God, but…

Paul says their words don’t match their actions. They are detestable. That Greek word is only used right here. It means revolting, abominable. Then he says they are disobedient. This word really has the meaning that they can’t be persuaded. Don’t waste your time. And finally, Paul says they are worthless. That’s kind of harsh, isn’t it? The Greek word means unapproved or rejected.

APPLICATION

So, let me ask you something. Is that how you want you or your children to be known? “Not really, Carl.” Then you have to decide to surrender your life fully to Christ as you walk with Him daily. We can’t say we believe Christ and not follow Him. We can’t say we love Christ and yet hate others. As you live out Christ, your children will see the connection. When they don’t, point it out.

There are far too many people in the church today who are playing pretend Christianity. They don’t seem to realize that the Lord sees right through that. And if you are walking in the truth daily, you will also. Your children, however, can be hoodwinked. People can fool them. Teach them to allow the Holy Spirit who resides within them to reveal people’s real motives. He will.

Pretenders know ABOUT God, but they don’t know God. If they really knew Him, they would not be detestable, disobedient or worthless. They would welcome good deeds and would be qualified to carry them out. Why? Because they would be done to glorify Jesus, not themselves.

How do you measure up? Are you pretending rather than living truth? Playing pretend can be fun if your playing. It’s not if you are talking about eternal things. There’s no fooling the Lord. Why don’t you today allow the Lord to set you free from the temptation to deceive others about your walk. Live in truth. It’s so much simpler.

You are the Real Deal. There is no pretending with You. I want to be known by others as genuine and true.

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Advice, Bible, Child Raising, Child Rearing, Deception, Encouragement, Eternity, Heaven, Mentoring, Modeling, Obedience, Parenting, Purity, Religion, Righteousness

STAINED OR UNSTAINED

TITUS 1:15

“To the pure, all things are pure; but to those who are defiled and unbelieving, nothing is pure, but both their mind and their conscience are defiled.”

Have you ever used stain on a piece of wood? My dad taught me how to stain. He showed me the difference between a piece of stained and unstained wood. You can see the grains that run through the wood when it’s unstained. But when you apply even a light coat of stain, those grains pop out. It changes your view of the wood.

That’s probably a poor analogy, but today’s verse has two very contrasting views – pure and defiled. You could translate these two words as unstained and stained. One is not distracted by the world. The other lives for it. One sees all things as God sees them. The other sees all things as they prefer to see them. Which are you?

APPLICATION

Shaping your child’s worldview is so important. But it begins with their salvation. Only God can truly change how they see the world. You, however, play a huge role in that you help set the environment in which they can readily adjust their eyes to see God’s truth and be ready to hear His voice. Once they respond to His calling (and He is calling them) He will give them that pure heart which will cause them to see “all things are pure.”

Or, you could choose to let your child just decide on their own about religion. After all, you wouldn’t want to influence them in such a private matter. Hogwash! What is more important – where they will spend eternity or being at school on time? We guide our children in life changing decisions. We don’t let them “figure it for themselves.”

Do you see the world clearly? Are you looking through lenses shaped by God’s purity? If not, you have chosen to wear the eyewear of the world in which everything is defiled and stained. Why not today trade in your old glasses for a brand, new pair fashioned by the Lord exclusively for you?

Thank You, Lord, for focusing my eyes on You. I know I can see more clearly when I see with a pure vision. I choose to look up, not down on this world You have placed me in.

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Advice, Bible, Child Raising, Child Rearing, Deception, Disciplemaking, Faith, Inspirational, Lies, Mentoring, Modeling, Obedience, Parenting, Scripture, Truth

DON’T GET LED ASTRAY

TITUS 1:14

“not paying attention to Jewish myths and commandments of men who turn away from the truth.”

This verse may not seem very important, but it really is. Paul is telling Titus to reprove the false teachers and make sure are not being led astray by “Jewish myths” and “commandments of men who turn away from the truth.” Did you get that? These men were listening to untruths and teaching them. They were being led astray.

Sometimes lies can sound so much like the truth. It can be easy to be led astray, especially if the information is coming from someone you trust. So, how do you protect yourself from that? You have to know the Word. Anything that goes against it is NOT the truth, no matter what the source. Traditions and ordinances are not the truth.

APPLICATION

Children will believe most people in authority – teachers, preachers, deacons, etc. That’s why it is important that they are grounded in the Word. That’s your job as parents. Teach them that if they hear anything that sounds a little odd to come to you to check it out. Theirs is nothing wrong with that. And a true teacher of the Word will never be offended by that.

What a valuable skill for your children. Recognizing truth and lies will help them throughout their life. The Word has to be their foundation, however. They are going to bombarded with “other” truths from seemingly trustworthy sources. Some of those sources will be people they admire, but any deviation from God’s truth is falsehood. God’s truth is timeless.

Do you struggle with discerning between truth and falsehood? Perhaps you have fallen for a “little falsehood.” Little falsehoods don’t exist. False is false. Lies are lies. Measure every truth and myth with THE TRUTH.

I know I can only trust Your truth, O Lord. Give me discernment to recognize and disclose any falsehoods. Let me be bold for Your Word.

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Advice, Bible, Child Bearing, Child Raising, Commands, Disciplemaking, Encouragement, Eternity, Evangelism, Following, Inspirational, Love, Mentoring, Modeling, Obedience, Parenting, Testimony, Witnessing

TOUGH LOVE

TITUS 1:13

“This testimony is true. For this reason reprove them severely so that they may be sound in the faith,”

When I read this verse, I was trying to figure out what point to emphasize. I settled on the word “severely.” Why? Because so many times we rebuke others so cautiously they truly don’t understand the severity of their sin. We hear people all the time talking about God’s love. I even heard someone on tv say one time that the Gospel means God loves you. While that statement is true, that is not the Gospel.

Paul says to rebuke them severely. That means just what is says. Give it to them with both barrels. If you don’t, they could very well spend eternity in hell. I know you don’t want that. They may get upset with you. That’s okay. I had rather have a mad friend in heaven than an unoffended friend in hell. Point out their errors from God’s perspective. The rest is up to Him. He will “close the deal.”

APPLICATION

This applies to our children as well. There are time when a swift, severe rebuke is called for. I don’t need to spell out what that means. You know. Don’t let the crocodile tears or the puppy dog eyes sway you. If you truly love your children, you will administer quick and decisive discipline. If you don’t, you are asking for trouble. They will figure it out, and you are gone for.

Willful disobedience is my threshold. When a child willfully disobeys, I respond with the severe rebuke. They know better, yet they willfully disobey. You have to be aware of their actions though. You can’t go on word of mouth. When they see you being consistent and harsh, you will begin to see a different child.

Are you willing to be the “bad guy”? Are do you compromise so they will still like you? Only one of these choices has a happy ending. I believe you will find if you will start out as firm rebuker, you will have fewer and fewer opportunities to show it. People will know you mean what you say and say what you mean. They will respect your approach. Do what God’s word says and experience the freedom of firmness.

Father, I don’t like being too firm with others, especially my own children. But I know You have called me to confront others in sin. Give me boldness to approach them and win them to Jesus.

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Bible, Child Raising, Child Rearing, Disciplemaking, Encouragement, Family, Inspirational, Mentoring, Modeling, Parenting, Reputation, Testimony

REPUTATION

TITUS 1:12

“One of themselves, a prophet of their own, said, ‘Cretans are always liars, evil beasts, lazy gluttons.’”

What a reputation! And this was said by one of their own. How would you like to be known as a liar? I’ve known people who would lie about the dumbest stuff. I didn’t know what to believe. I prefer to tell the truth. It’s much easier to keep straight.

And then he says they are evil beasts and lazy gluttons. The Greek word for “evil beasts” means brute. It’s someone who is always aggressive and mean towards others. “Lazy gluttons” means just want you think. All they think about is satisfying their own belly, their own desires, but they don’t want to do anything about it. What a terrible reputation.

APPLICATION

My dad always told me that our reputation was important. The Willis name was known as an honorable name. My dad’s name meant something in our hometown. So, he pressed my brother and I, especially, to keep that same reputation. Well, family names are important, but keeping the name of Jesus above reproach is even more important.

You need to teach your children when they come to Christ, that they now represent Jesus wherever they go. What they do and say reflects on Him. As a Christian we have a higher calling. We are not perfect, but we need to live in such a way that others are drawn to Christ and not repelled by our lifestyle. Of course, you have to model this for your children. They will learn best by observing.

Are you living that way? If someone were to describe you, especially a non-believer, what would they say? Are you more like a Cretan or a Christian? I pray today you take a moment to look at your outward display of your faith. Make sure everyone you come into contact with knows where your allegiance is – with Christ. May He be glorified in all you do this day.

I am not perfect, Lord, but You are. Help me submit my will and actions to Your divine plan for my life today. I want others to see only You when they see me.

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Advice, Bible, Child Raising, Child Rearing, Disciplemaking, Encouragement, Evil, Inspirational, Mentoring, Modeling, Obedience, Parenting, Satan, Testimony, Understanding

PUT A MUZZLE ON HIM

TITUS 1:11

“who must be silenced because they are upsetting whole families, teaching things they should not teach for the sake of sordid gain.’

One time our dear, precious dog named Reese had to be muzzled. He had hurt his back chasing birds in our back yard and had to see the vet. Because he was hurting so bad, the vet knew he would be very defensive about being touched, even though the vet was trying to help him. So, on went the muzzle. The vet worked on him and then took it off.

Why am I talking about muzzles? Because the Greek word for “must be silenced” means exactly that. The word only appears right here in the New Testament and means to stop the mouth or muzzle. These people’s words are harmful and need to be stopped. Now, you can’t put a muzzle on people (although that would be nice sometimes, lol), but you can stop the words from influencing your family by refusing to listen and changing the environment.

APPLICATION

Your children are going to hear all kinds of wrong teaching and ideas as they grow up. How do you protect them? Well, you insulate them rather than isolate them. As you teach them the truth of God’s Word, they will learn to recognize the false teachings. You must teach them when they hear these things to handle them. What do I mean by that?

They may not be able to leave the situation if they are in a classroom hearing this from a teacher. In that case, they must be prepared to stand their ground and defend the Gospel. If they are somewhere from which they can remove themselves, that might be the best option. And they may have to change some friends who refuse to hear the truth and openly oppose it. Those are tough lessons, but the Lord will protect and defend them.

Are you willing to stand for the Gospel and defend your family from the attacks of the evil one? You may need to change your tv habits. You may need to adjust the music you are listening to. You may have to avoid certain situations with your children because you know there will be conflict with some people. Whatever it is, you need to decide to stand tall and trust the Lord. He’s got your back.

I am grateful for Your steadfast presence in my life. I know I can trust You to defend me when I am attacked. Help me be strong and bold in the face of opposition.

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