Category Archives: Grief

Belief, Bible, Death, Grief, Scripture, Sorrow, Uncategorized, Worship

WORSHIPFUL MOURNING

ZECHARIAH 12:13

“the family of the house of Levi by itself and their wives by themselves; the family of the Shimeites by itself and their wives by themselves;”

As a minister for over four decades, I have had ample opportunities to come alongside a family or individual during their time of loss. There are few moments as tender as when you are standing beside someone as their loved one transitions from this life to the next. As much as you pray beforehand and prepare for the moment, there is still a huge jolt for them as that time arrives. Real ministry is done at these times.

Why do I mention that? Because in today’s verse, Zechariah mentions the house of Levi and the Shimeites. These were part of the priestly line in Judah and are representative of that group. Mourning (the theme the past few verses) was not just a national thing or even a personal thing. It is a worshipful moment. The priests knew that and could show the people how to mourn and give God praise.

APPLICATION

We are to give praise in all things. I know! I know! That is easier said than done. But if God tells us we can do something, then it is possible. James 1:2-4 tells us, “Consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith will produce endurance. And let endurance have its perfect result, so that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing.”

So, how do you give praise, how do you worship and mourn at the same time? You point all your grief heavenward. You acknowledge your God above all things. There is probably one of the best illustrations of this in the book of Job. After Job has suffered great loss (property, livestock and all of his children), this is what happens in Job 1:20-22.

“20 Then Job got up, tore his robe, and shaved his head; then he fell to the ground and worshiped. 21 He said, ‘Naked I came from my mother’s womb, and naked I shall return there. The LORD gave and the LORD has taken away. Blessed be the name of the LORD.’ 22 Despite all this, Job did not sin, nor did he blame God.”

Don’t miss that last line – “nor did he blame God.” Remember, as you worship in your mourning that God never inflicts harm on His children. He only wants to comfort and console us during these times of grief. Mourn, for sure, but as you do, worship the Lord Almighty who is and was and is to come.

Father, I worship You, no matter my circumstance, no matter my grief.

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Bible, Comfort, Death, Grief, Holy Spirit, Mourning, Scripture

INDIVIDUAL MOURNING

ZECHARIAH 12:12

“‘The land will mourn, every family by itself; the family of the house of David by itself and their wives by themselves; the family of the house of Nathan by itself and their wives by themselves;’”

Mourning is a family affair. When a loved one passes, the whole family comes together to remember them, to share stories, to laugh and to cry. But in all my mourning experiences, it has also been my private mourning. I have mourned the death of a child, my dad, my mom, my brother and both my in-laws. Each death caused me to search my own heart to find the comfort from Christ.

Zechariah continues his thought on mourning in verse 12, but this time he turns to individual families. He looks at the house of David and also the house of Nathan. Who is this Nathan? 1 Chronicles 3:5 says, “These were the children born to him in Jerusalem: Shimea, Shobab, Nathan, and Solomon, four by Bath-shua the daughter of Ammiel;” So, Nathan was David’s son, the brother of Solomon. You see, this mourning had to be individual, not just a national mourning, but a family mourning.

APPLICATION

Or role as believers in this grief process is to be real. We don’t need to hide our tears. Believe me, that is not possible with me. I am Mr. Waterworks, lol. Be transparent without being dramatic. Go to the Psalms. They are full of words to comfort during these times. Psalm 34:18 is one of those verses. “The LORD is near to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.”

Here’s another one. Psalm 147:3 tells us, “He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.” The point is this – His Word has the power to heal that gaping wound in your chest when your loved one is gone. Only Jesus can soothe you. No prescription, no counselor, no support group (and these are all fine and good things to tap into, if needed) will ultimately heal you. Only Jesus.

In all my grieving moments, nothing brought me more peace than to get alone with my God and talk to Him, knowing He was listening. God speaks to us if we will listen. His Spirit speaks to our spirit. I don’t understand how the heavenly cell service works. I just know it does. Spend some time listening today.

O Lord, I thank You that in my times of grief, You show up and take me into Your arms.

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Affection, Bible, Crying, Darkness, Death, Despair, Grief, Mourning, Scripture, Tears

WAILING

ZECHARIAH 11:2

“Wail, juniper, because the cedar has fallen, for the magnificent trees have been destroyed; wail, oaks of Bashan, because the impenetrable forest has come down.”

Have you ever heard someone wail? What is that? It’s a loud scream or howl. It has the sound as if someone is dying. It’s an extreme mournful sound. I have heard that sound several times in my life. All of them came at the scene of death. Someone had died and their loved ones were wailing at the thought of never seeing them again. It’s a gut-wrenching sound.

Zechariah continues the imagery of trees and their representation of Israel, the temple and its leaders. If the temple (cedar) has fallen, then the juniper and oaks (their leaders) would certainly fall. The word for “wail” here is used exclusively by the Old Testament prophets. Isaiah, Jeremiah, Joel, Ezekiel, and Amos also employ the use of this descriptive word.

APPLICATION

What are you wailing about? What has you so upset that you can’t eat or drink? I have seen believers who were so upset they could not function. If that is you, may I encourage you to dry your tears and turn your thoughts towards Jesus. He is the author and finisher of your faith. He can restore what you have lost in His own way.

There have been a couple of times in my life when I found myself wailing from deep, personal heartache. We are told in Revelation 21:4, “and He will wipe away every tear from their eyes; and there will no longer be any death; there will no longer be any mourning, or crying, or pain; the first things have passed away.” Do you believe that? Then trust Him now.

Instead of tears of heartache, I prefer tears of joy. I would rather have tears of repentance than tears of mourning. So, are you wailing? Let your wails be wails of repentance over your sins. Wail to God for Him to forgive you. Wail to Him over the way you have not followed Him as you should. But trust Him in the midst of the wailings. God never runs out of Kleenex to wipe away your tears.

Thank You, Lord, for wiping my tears. I want to wail only over my sins and trust You with all my life.

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Abiding, Battles, Bible, Grief, Scripture, Sorrow

SORROWFUL

ZEPHANIAH 3:18

“‘I will gather those who are worried about the appointed feasts—they came from you, Zion; the disgrace of exile is a burden on them.’”

Some things grieve my heart. When I see a child that has been abused, I grieve over the pain they have suffered. When I see injustice around me, I grieve for justice to be done. When I see a loved one suffering due to a loss in their life, it grieves me. Have you grieved over anything lately? Grief affects us all differently, doesn’t it?

In today’s verse, we see the Lord saying He would “gather those who are worried.” The Hebrew meaning of the word that is translated “worried” is sorrowful, grieving or afflicted. That really changes this verse, doesn’t it? I believe “worried” is not the best translation for this word. This remnant wasn’t just worried. They were grieving “about the appointed feast.” They were broken-hearted.

APPLICATION

Paul writes to the Thessalonians and says in his first letter “But we do not want you to be uninformed, brothers and sisters, about those who are asleep, so that you will not grieve as indeed the rest of mankind do, who have no hope.” Sure, we grieve but not like the world. Our grief is soothed by our Lord Jesus. He knows our pain and heals us.

As I said earlier, grief affects each of us differently. Some people get stuck in their grief for decades. Others seem to push through it in months. The circumstance that caused the grief can determine the longevity of the grief and sorrow also. Take a moment to examine your life. Are you grieving over something right now? Is there anything you can do to end your grieving? Is there someone you can talk to?

Matthew 11:28-30 is a perfect passage for us regarding our suffering and grief. “28 ‘Come to Me, all who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. 29 Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and YOU WILL FIND REST FOR YOUR SOULS.  30 For My yoke is comfortable, and My burden is light’” Rest in Him.

I am thankful, Lord, that my grief does not depend on me to end. I come to You, the Healer of my soul.

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Affliction, Battles, Bible, Brokenness, Darkness, Death, Despair, Devil, Encouragement, Enemies, Grief, Heaven, Mourning, Satan, Scripture

THE ENEMY APPROACHES

MICAH 1:15

“Moreover, I will bring on you the one who takes possession, you inhabitant of Mareshah. The glory of Israel will enter Adullam.”

In times of distress the enemy will attack. I just woke up to discover a dear brother in the ministry lost his sweet, precious wife last night. She died suddenly, leaving a gapping hole in my brother’s chest. We are praying for him, but most especially praying protection over him from the enemy’s attack. We know Satan loves to attack us when we are down.

Assyria was attacking Israel and Judah. “The one who takes possession” refers to the enemy invader. God was allowing the enemy to attack in order to judge His chosen people. He was striving to bring them back to Him, even if it meant severe judgment. But God had not broken His covenant with them. Israel (all 12 tribes) was still His child.

APPLICATION

Our spiritual enemy is powerful and very well armed. He loves to catch us unawares and unprotected. Sudden losses in our lives can shatter us emotionally. When we are in these places, the devil will whisper in our ears that God does not love us, that He does not care about us. Do not believe those lies.

That is why it is so important to cover yourself in God’s Word. Only His Word can get you through those times. This morning, the first passage that came to my mind was 2 Corinthians 1:3-5.

“3Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, 4who comforts us in all our affliction so that we will be able to comfort those who are in any affliction with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God. 5For just as the sufferings of Christ are ours in abundance, so also our comfort is abundant through Christ.”

My dear brother will be okay. He will get through this. Why? Because I know he loves Jesus and loves His Word which is filled with the promises of God. He knows the Father loves him dearly. He may not understand why He took his bride home now, but he will – eventually. Be on guard my brothers and sisters.

Lord, thank You for Your promises. I know they never fail.

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Advocate, Affection, Bible, Brokenness, Comfort, Compassion, Despair, Grief, Holy Spirit, Mourning

HOW TO MOURN 

MICAH 1:8 

“Because of this I must mourn and wail, I must go barefoot and naked; I must do mourning like the jackals, and a mourning like the ostriches.” 

I have been to a lot of funerals throughout my ministry. Some of those who were grieving were really upset at the funeral. I have experienced some extreme mournings during those services. I have seen people hold onto the casket of their loved ones and just wail and moan. I have seen others fall on the floor sobbing uncontrollably. Everyone mourns differently. 

When I looked at today’s verse in the Hebrew, I discovered something interesting. The four words – mourn, wail, do mourning and mourning – are four different Hebrew words. They each describe the action differently. Look it up yourself. Why would the Holy Spirit lead Micah to use four different words to describe this? I believe it is because one word just can’t express our emotions. Micah is mourning and mourning greatly. 

APPLICATION 

Mourning is an important part of our lives. When we lose a loved one or a pet, we naturally feel empty. I am reminded of a passage from 1 Timothy 4. Verse 13 says, “But we do not want you to be uninformed, brothers and sisters, about those who are asleep, so that you will not grieve as indeed the rest of mankind do, who have no hope.” 

Aren’t you glad our mourning isn’t based on earthly guidelines? God is with us in our deepest grief. He holds us tenderly as we weep and mourn. He understands. He created our tears. When we can’t find the words to pray, the Holy Spirit groans for us. 

I have grieved over the loss of a child, a dad and a mom. Other relatives have gone on to their heavenly reward. With each one I grieved differently. Just as Micah used different words to describe his grief, no one word could explain mine. Those are the times when I just rested in Jesus. Words were not necessary. Rest in Him today. 

Father of compassion and God of all comfort, I praise You for the words You give during our times of grief. 

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Affection, Bible, Comfort, Encouragement, Grief, Modeling, Mourning

SACKCLOTH

AMOS 8:10

“Then I will turn your festivals into mourning, and all your songs into songs of mourning; and I will put sackcloth around everyone’s waist, and baldness on every head. And I will make it like a time of mourning for an only son, and the end of it will be like a bitter day.”

I remember the old burlap bags I used to bag up potatoes on my grandmother’s farm. We would dig the potatoes, bag them in those bags and carry them to the old farmhouse and pour them out on the floor for storage. Burlap bags can do a number on your knuckles and hands after a day of lugging those things around.

I can’t even imagine wearing those around my loins. That’s what they did during their mourning. The coarseness of the sackcloth (burlap bag) rubbed them reminding them of their fallen state. It was uncomfortable. They didn’t realize changing your clothes doesn’t bring about true repentance.

APPLICATION

Here in the U.S., we are accustomed to wearing black when we are mourning. A widow or widower will dress in black when their spouse passes away. If you think about it, if the loved one who passed was a believer, we should be celebrating. We should wear bright and festive clothes.

I preached a funeral recently where the widow wore a beautiful turquoise jacket. I bet there were some in the crowd who questioned that. No need to. Her husband loved Jesus. We were giving praise to Jesus for his homecoming. I know she was grieving, but she was also celebrating.

How do you face mourning? Are you trusting in the One who truly knows our griefs? He can restore your joy. He can cause you to celebrate. Let Him lead you during those times of mourning and you will come out the other side singing for joy.

I trust You in the good times, so I will trust You in the hard times.

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