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TOUGH LOVE

TITUS 1:13

“This testimony is true. For this reason reprove them severely so that they may be sound in the faith,”

When I read this verse, I was trying to figure out what point to emphasize. I settled on the word “severely.” Why? Because so many times we rebuke others so cautiously they truly don’t understand the severity of their sin. We hear people all the time talking about God’s love. I even heard someone on tv say one time that the Gospel means God loves you. While that statement is true, that is not the Gospel.

Paul says to rebuke them severely. That means just what is says. Give it to them with both barrels. If you don’t, they could very well spend eternity in hell. I know you don’t want that. They may get upset with you. That’s okay. I had rather have a mad friend in heaven than an unoffended friend in hell. Point out their errors from God’s perspective. The rest is up to Him. He will “close the deal.”

APPLICATION

This applies to our children as well. There are time when a swift, severe rebuke is called for. I don’t need to spell out what that means. You know. Don’t let the crocodile tears or the puppy dog eyes sway you. If you truly love your children, you will administer quick and decisive discipline. If you don’t, you are asking for trouble. They will figure it out, and you are gone for.

Willful disobedience is my threshold. When a child willfully disobeys, I respond with the severe rebuke. They know better, yet they willfully disobey. You have to be aware of their actions though. You can’t go on word of mouth. When they see you being consistent and harsh, you will begin to see a different child.

Are you willing to be the “bad guy”? Are do you compromise so they will still like you? Only one of these choices has a happy ending. I believe you will find if you will start out as firm rebuker, you will have fewer and fewer opportunities to show it. People will know you mean what you say and say what you mean. They will respect your approach. Do what God’s word says and experience the freedom of firmness.

Father, I don’t like being too firm with others, especially my own children. But I know You have called me to confront others in sin. Give me boldness to approach them and win them to Jesus.

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THE RIGHT MAN

TITUS 1:6

namely, if any man is above reproach, the husband of one wife, having children who believe, not accused of dissipation or rebellion.”

Paul begins a list of qualifications for elders in today’s verse that goes through verse 9. This list is long and intimidating. When I read it, I wonder who can fulfill it. Who can possibly meet all these expectations? Only the man who is one hundred percent surrendered to the Lordship of Christ.

Paul describes an elder, the men he wants Titus to find and appoint in Crete, as above reproach or blameless, He must not have more than one wife. He has to be old enough for his children to have accepted Christ. He can withstand accusations that he is unsalvageable or insubordinate. Wow! That bar is high.

APPLLICATION

Children play a key role in their father’s selection as elder. Why would their children’s salvation be a determining factor? Because it implies that he has spent the time to invest in their lives and lead them to Christ. It implies that family is a priority. They say your family should be your first mission.

This is why, mom and dad, I spend so much time telling you to read Scripture to your kids. Scripture is what draws them to salvation. It prepares their heart to hear from the Lord. That means you must be a student of the Word. You must be comfortable sharing and applying it. This is an eternal decision. Don’t take it lightly.How do you line up with the list given today? You may never be asked to serve as an Elder. But I believe we all need to strive for the highest standards. We all serve a mighty God. If you don’t meet the criteria, ask the Lord to change your heart. He can use you. Won’t you let him?

O precious Lord, I know I am not worthy, but You want to use me. I am Your vessel. I surrender to You.

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MY CHILD

TITUS 1:4

“To Titus, my true child in a common faith: Grace and peace from God the Father and Christ Jesus our Savior.”

Titus was special to Paul. Why? It’s because of that phrase in today’s verse – “my true child in a common faith.” Paul had “birthed” him into the kingdom of God. He was a direct convert of Paul’s ministry. Unlike Timothy, who Paul found already a believer, Titus had surrendered to Christ because of Paul.

There is something special about those relationships. I know those whom I have led to Christ and prayed with to receive Christ as their Savior always hold a special place in my heart. The spiritual connection of two people as they approach the throne of grace is life changing. If you have never experienced that, you need to.

APPLICATION

Perhaps the greatest thrill for parents is leading their children to receive Christ. It’s interesting that the Greek word for “true” is today’s verse means legitimate birth. It’s one thing to have your own legitimately born children. But to have those same children to be reborn as children of God is so much more exciting.

I bet you have a video of your child’s birth. Get it out and show them. Talk about how thrilled you were when they came. Talk about how you had planned for their arrival. You had prepared a room. You had picked out a name. You couldn’t wait to meet them. But then turn the conversation to salvation. In the same way, the Lord has done all those things. This is a perfect time to share the Gospel with them or, if they are already a believer, to affirm their decision.

With whom have you shared lately? Don’t keep this truth to yourself. You need a Titus in your life. You need to lead others to Jesus. You are missing out on the joy of the Christ-life when you don’t take the opportunities to come alongside someone in their search for truth and lead them into salvation. Pray for someone to cross your path today with whom you see come to Christ.

Forgive me, Lord, for squandering the opportunities to witness to others. I want “true children of the faith” in my life. Lead me to others who are searching.

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I CANNOT LIE

TITUS 1:2

“in the hope of eternal life, which God, who cannot lie, promised long ages ago,”

We have probably all heard the story about George Washington (the first President of the United States) as a boy when he was asked who cut down the cherry tree. He said, “I cannot lie. I did it.” We don’t know if that was legend or truth, but he was known as an honest man, not prone to lie. In today’s verse we see that character trait attributed to God, who also cannot lie.

Now, unlike George Washington, God is truly not capable of lying. There is no deceit in Him. He is pure truth. It is interesting to me that the Greek word used here for “cannot lie” is only used right here in this verse. Only God cannot lie. Everyone else is capable, including you and me.

APPLICATION

How many times have you told your child, when correcting them, “Now, don’t lie to me”? We want them to tell the truth. I know when my children were small, I could deal with almost any behavior, but just don’t lie to me. That made things worse. So, how do you get your children to be truthful? Bathe them in the Word. Only the truth of God can transform them into truth tellers rather than liars.

Your job as mom and dad is to obey the Holy Spirit’s leading in your life to provide the environment for salvation and spiritual growth. That includes you being truthful. Have you ever involved your child in a lie? What message does that send your child? If it’s okay for mom or dad, it’s okay for me. And then you punish them for lying to you. Confusing! You must model and live a truthful life for them to follow.

Are you known as a truthful person or a liar? When you give your word, can you be believed? If you are a believer, you represent our heavenly Father who cannot lie. Remember that. It’s not just about your reputation. If the lost world cannot trust Christians to tell the truth, why should they believe anything we say about the Gospel?

Forgive me, Father, for not being truthful at times. I tend to rationalize and justify my lies, but they are just sin. Help me remember it is You who lives within me, who cannot lie.

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AS I LEAVE

2 TIMOTHY 4:22

“The Lord be with your spirit. Grace be with you.”

Paul’s final written words (as far we know) to Timothy are contained in this verse. Paul prayed the Lord would be with his spirt and His grace would also be with him. Nothing fancy. No flowing words. Just Jesus and grace. But think about. What else could he want for Timothy?

If you knew the words you were about to say to someone were the last words they would ever hear from you, what would you say? That, of course, would depend on whom you were addressing, right? If it was my wife, I would say something different than if I was addressing my neighbor or doctor or even my children. It’s the audience that can determine those words.

APPLICATION

Last words matter. You have probably taught your children about making a good first impression. But how about that last impression? You don’t want your child leaving someone with them thinking poorly of them, do you. So, what do you tell your child to do when they leave someone?

I often pray with someone before I leave them. That would be great to model for your children. Praying for someone, just as Paul did for Timothy, sends a message to them. It says they are special to you because they are to God. It says you care for them because Jesus died for them. And it’s really hard to walk away mad if you just prayed for someone, lol.

Today, focus not only on your greetings but also your goodbyes. Make sure your parting words are comforting and not confrontational. Ask someone if you can pray as you leave. You may just blow their mind. And pray sincerely and quickly. You don’t have to make it a sermon. You certainly don’t want them to avoid your parting prayer next time.

O Father, parting is hard sometime. Help me leave those I love and care for by leaving the grace and presence of Jesus with them. May they receive it and embrace it.

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WHO?

2 TIMOTHY 4:21

“Make every effort to come before winter. Eubulus greets you, also Pudens and Linus and Claudia and all the brethren.”

In this next to last verse of 2 Timothy, Paul mentions four individuals who we know nothing about. You might just read this verse and move right on. Who cares about Eubulus, Pudens, Linus and Claudia? Paul did. And he thought enough about them to mention them to Timothy who also must have known them by name. Otherwise they would not have been mentioned.

Some people are name droppers. They like to mention they know or have met “so and so.” Usually that person they mention is well known or famous. It would be like me saying when he was alive, “Yesterday Billy and I were just talking.” Of course, I am referring to Billy Graham. Listen, everyone is important. Treat them that way.

APPLICATION

I want you to make a list of all the friends that your children have. Sit down with them and do that. Then make up a scale of one to five and have them score them according to how much they like them. One will be the least liked and five will be their BFF. This may take a while so be patient.

When they get done tell them to tear it up. They may argue a bit but insist. Now, read the verse to them. Explain that these four individuals fell somewhere on that one to five scale, but they probably weren’t fives because in all of Paul’s letters they aren’t mentioned anywhere else. But here, in Paul’s very last letter, they are the last people he mentioned. Friends are friends. They are all important.

How many friends do you have? I have over two thousand on Facebook. Some I have met through other friends. Some are mere acquaintances. Do you know why I made them my friends on Facebook? So I can expose them to the Gospel and encourage them. Will you make the effort today to reach out to one of your “lesser” friends and encourage them? God placed them in your life for a reason. Don’t forget that.

I am grateful for each friend You have allowed to cross my path. Help me encourage them today through Your Word. Let me be the friend they need today.

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FRIENDS LEFT BEHIND

2 TIMOTHY 4:20

“Erastus remained at Corinth, but Trophimus I left sick at Miletus.”

Both Erastus and Trophimus were trusted colleagues of Paul on his missionary journeys. Paul knew them both well and wanted to make sure Timothy conveyed his greetings in his farewell letter. Erastus was the treasurer of Corinth, so he was probably very well known. What an opportunity he had to share the Gospel.

Trophimus was left in Miletus by Paul when he became sick. Now, let’s talk about that. Didn’t Paul have the gift of healing? He had healed many people. So, why didn’t he just say, “Get up Trophimus. We’ve got to go.” Because God directs and does the healing, not us. We don’t decide when and whom to heal.

APPLICATION

Unless your children remain in your home all their life and you never move and their friends do the same, they are going to leave friends behind. That can be hard. I know it was for my children. We made a few moves during their childhood which forced them to leave friends and make new ones. So, how do we prepare them for that? What can we say and do to make that easier?

Here are few ideas:

  1. Invest in their friends while they are with them. Get to know them.
  2. Get to know their parents. Know them by name and talk about them to your children.
  3. Help your children share Jesus with them. Leaving behind a saved friend, knowing you will see them in eternity, is so much easier.
  4. Help your children make contact after the move easier. Let them FaceTime or Skype their friends.
  5. Pray with your children for those friends. Keep up with their prayer needs through their parents and pass them on to your children.

Now, these won’t prevent the tears from flowing when the parting comes. But knowing the separation is temporary (only here on earth) can be such a comfort. Do you have a friend that comes to mind whom you have had to leave behind? Why not this week reach out to them. It is so much easier today. And say a prayer for them. That’s the oldest form of long distance communication.

Father, thank You for friends. Thank You for companions who You put in our path through life. I ask You today to bless them.

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SAY “HOWDY”

2 TIMOTHY 4:19

“Greet Prisca and Aquila, and the household of Onesiphorus.”

Have you ever told someone to say “hi” for you to an old friend? That’s all Paul is doing here. Do you remember Prisca (Priscilla) and Aquilla from Acts? They were the fellow tent makers whom Paul took up with during one of his journeys. And Onesiphorus was an old friend from Ephesus whom had been very kind and compassionate to Paul while he was in Rome in prison.

Friends are important, especially those with whom we have ministered. That ministry binds us. We have the same purpose, motive and drive. What is it? To present the Gospel to a lost world. I wonder how many people these friends saw come to Christ together.

APPLICATION

Friends with a purpose – that is important for us to teach our children. Now, I don’t mean to imply that there is anything wrong with having playdates or friends over to play ball. That would be silly. But we parents need to encourage our children to have friends who share the same worldview.

If their friends don’t see the world as we see the world (lost and dying and in need of a Savior), they will probably discourage your son or daughter in their faith. I don’t mean they will say, “Don’t be a Christian.” But they may say, “You don’t have to do that.” Our children need friends who share their faith, purpose and drive, just like us.

Do your friends? Or are you still living your old lifestyle? We need to engage our old friends for Christ. We need to present the Gospel to them. Otherwise, we were never friends, right. If you can’t share the most loving thing with the people you love, you never loved them to begin with. Now, go love.

Thank You, Lord, for friends who love You and me. I am committed to loving others to You. Surround me with those whom share Your view of this world.

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KEEP MY EYE ON YOU

2 TIMOTHY 4:15

“Be on guard against him yourself, for he vigorously opposed our teaching.”

Paul is continuing his warning to Timothy in today’s verse about Alexander the coppersmith. He is basically saying, “Keep your eye on him.” He doesn’t say retaliate. He doesn’t say to speak against him. He says, “Be on guard…” There are some people we need to watch closely.

But why? “for he vigorously opposed our teaching.”  It wasn’t because he didn’t like Paul. It wasn’t because he made idols. It was because he was an open opponent of the gospel. Those are the ones we need to keep an eye on. And remember, they are salvageable also. Christ can do a work in their life. If you don’t believe me, read Lee Strobel’s “The Case for Christ.”

APPLICATION

Teaching our kids not to get back at someone who doesn’t like them can be difficult. We are naturally inclined to do that. But we can teach them to be watchful. What is the first thing you tell your son or daughter when you are teaching them to hit a baseball or softball? Keep your eye on the ball! Why? To make contact. To hit it where they want to hit it.

Let’s apply this to today’s verse. If they can keep their eye on people who they know oppose Jesus, they may just see an opening to “hit” them where they can find Jesus. They also protect themselves from being “hit” by that person in their opposition. Go outside and pitch them a few balls. They’ll get it clearly when you bang them with the ball. Just kidding!

Whom are you keeping your eye on? Are you even concerned enough about the Gospel that those who oppose it are recognized by you? They are really pretty easy to spot.

Their whole worldview is different. You may need to examine your walk with Christ if you cannot point out those around you who have Alexander’s attitude.

Lord, help me to guard against those who would want to harm the Gospel message. And keep my eye on them for opportunities to present it to them in a loving, inviting way. Better yet, help me be Jesus to them.

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THE LORD WILL REPAY

2 TIMOTHY 4:14

“Alexander the coppersmith did me much harm; the Lord will repay him according to his deeds.”

It’s pretty obvious that Alexander didn’t care for Paul. We aren’t exactly sure who he was, but there are a few speculations. He may have been one of the metal workers thrust forth by the Jews to denounce Paul in Ephesus. Demetrius had begun this protest, but a man named Alexander was trying speak about how Paul’s mission work was hurting the sale of idols of the great temple of Artemis, which was their livelihood.

This name appears later in Acts at Paul’s trial. This time he is there publicly to speak against Paul. Animosity, hatred, pure evil. Paul knew it, but what did he tell Timothy? Turn the other cheek. Do not engage this man. God will handle him. As powerful and as loud as Alexander may appear, God is bigger and louder (if necessary).

APPLICATION

Do you think your children are going to face an Alexander? You had better believe it. If your children are attempting to live for Jesus, there will be people who will feel threatened. You may not know why they feel threatened, but they will. It may go to their own insecurities. It could be from their wrecked childhood. But for some reason, they have it out for your son or daughter. So, what do you tell them to do? The exact same thing Paul told Timothy – let God have it.

Do you now what all “Alexanders” need? Jesus! They need His forgiveness. They need His love. They need His mercy. And all of that comes through us. God still uses His people to deliver the gospel. Teach your children to be that deliverer of hope to “Alexanders.” And when they rise up in hatred, love them more.

Who do you need to approach in love today whom has set out to tear you down? We all have someone who just doesn’t like us. We may not know why, but God does. Ask Him. You may share a past with that person that could bring them to Christ. But whatever you do, don’t retaliate. That’s the Lord’s job, and He can handle it much better than you.

Father, I lay down my plans to get even right now. It is hard not to want to get back at those who have harmed me. But at Your command, I will obey.

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