Category Archives: Modeling

Busyness, Child Rearing, Christ's Return, Commands, Completeness, Direction, Encouragement, Hope, Love, Mentoring, Modeling, Obedience, Parenting

SELF AFFLICTED

1 TIMOTHY 5:12

“thus incurring condemnation, because they have set aside their previous pledge.” 

Have you ever known people who complain about how awful their life is only to find out their troubles are the result of their own decisions? People lose their driving privileges from DUI’s – self-afflicted. Getting a speeding ticket – self-afflicted. I could go on and on, but you see where I am going with this. Now, every situation is unique. However, most of our troubles (me included) are the result of self.

In today’s verse, the younger widows receive judgment or condemnation for deserting their first love, not for wanting to get married again. They had pledged to serve Christ but abandoned that calling. Before you judge them, however, we are the same way. We all just want what we want when we want it, disregarding previous commitments.

APPLICATION

We have the responsibility as parents to teach our children to keep their commitments. Once they agree to be a part of a team sport, they should complete that season unless injury or team conduct merits leaving the team. Once your child begins a project, they need to complete it. Finality is important. Seeing the project through to completion teaches great lessons.

Today, too many of us get bored with something and just drop it. We have forgotten the discipline of completion. We have forgotten the discipline of commitment. Don’t let your children do that. Hold them accountable. In the future they will thank you.

Are you guilty of quitting when it gets hard? If you are, go back and pick that project or task back up again. Finish it. Set some goals and accomplish them. Set reasonable goals, some you know you can meet. Then next time you can raise the bar a little bit. But just don’t quit.

Master and Teacher, You never quit on us. So, I will not quit on You. I will accept and complete the tasks You give me.

Standard
Affection, Bible, Busyness, Child Raising, Child Rearing, Direction, Disciplemaking, Encouragement, Family, God's Will, Love, Mentoring, Ministry, Modeling, Obedience, Parenting, Passion, Sanctification, Service, Widows

CHRIST FIRST

1 TIMOTHY 5:11

“But refuse to put younger widows on the list, for when they feel sensual desires in disregard of Christ, they want to get married,” 

I have to admit that I had to consult some commentators on this verse. At first glance in the English, this paints the younger widows in a bad way. Fortunately, the Greek meaning of the phrase “feel sensual desires in disregard of” was not originally meant to portray such a negative opinion. The Greek word for that phrase is only used here in the New Testament.

The purpose of “the list” of widows was for the church to minister to them and for the widows, in return, minister to each other and serve the Body. Paul is merely saying that younger widows will have the natural desires to remarry which will limit their ability to serve. He is not condemning these young widows. He is, in fact, releasing them from the obligation to serve.

APPLICATION

How in the world do you apply this verse to your children? Easy! Put Christ first! Putting Christ first is costly. Putting Christ first means letting other things go. Putting Christ first means not doing some things and pursuing other things. Now, tell me that doesn’t apply to your kids.

When we teach our children to pursue Christ first, they will have to make some tough choices. They will be given ample opportunities to pursue everything but Christ. They will have to choose which master to follow. If we invest the time to teach them the honor and privilege of putting Christ first, they will reap the benefits of that close, personal relationship that comes with that. Don’t you want that for your son or daughter?

Are you putting Christ first? Or are you pursuing the world, with all its distractions. You cannot put family or work or even ministry first and expect to have that intimate relationship with Christ. Whatever is causing you to put Christ anywhere but in first place in your life must be examined closely and put in its proper position in your life.

Lord Jesus, I want You to be first in my life. I want You to come before anything. I want You to be second to nothing.

Standard
Affection, Bible, Caregiver, Child Raising, Child Rearing, Christianity, Commands, Disciplemaking, Encouragement, Faith, Family, Love, Mentoring, Mercy, Ministry, Modeling, Obedience, Qualifications, Service, Widows, Works

WORTHY OF HONOR

1 TIMOTHY 5:10

“having a reputation for good works; and if she has brought up children, if she has shown hospitality to strangers, if she has washed the saints’ feet, if she has assisted those in distress, and if she has devoted herself to every good work.” 

Just look at the list of this widow’s character traits making her worthy of honor by the church. She has a good reputation. She is a child raiser. She is hospitable, service oriented, full of mercy and devoted. Wow! That’s some woman!

But shouldn’t we all be like that? I mean, look at the list again. Which one of those traits don’t belong in your life? The bottom line is she puts others before herself. Therein lies the rub. We don’t want to do that. We want to see ourselves first. We want to meet our needs first. It’s always me, me, me!

APPLICATION

Well, this is a no brainer. As parents, we are constantly teaching our little Gertrudes and Elords how to not be selfish. We teach children to share because they are naturally selfish. We teach them to watch out for their little brother or sister because they are not concerned with that. 

But once again, this is better caught than taught. We must model these behaviors. When they see us showing mercy to someone, they learn from that. When they observe us serving someone else, they watch how it’s done. We are living out the traits they need to embrace. So, be very careful what you do and say. Little eyes and ears are watching and listening.

How are you in regard to these traits? Are you hospitable? Do you show mercy or wrath? We may not be a widow who needs to be put on the church list, but we still need to live out these same godly traits. And what is amazing is that when we do these things, we are the ones who are blessed. Be a blessing!

I do enjoy blessing others, Lord. Help me see their need even before it is apparent. Let me be Your hands and feet to them.

Standard
Advice, Bible, Caregiver, Child Raising, Child Rearing, Comfort, Commands, Disciplemaking, Encouragement, Family, Love, Ministry, Modeling, Obedience, Parenting, Service, Widows

SIGN THEM UP

1 TIMOTHY 5:9

“A widow is to be put on the list only if she is not less than sixty years old, having been the wife of one man,” 

I’m a list maker. I didn’t used to be. After my bout with chemo several years ago I lost some of my short-term memory skills. So, now I have to make lists or poof – that thought vanishes. You are probably asking yourself, “Carl, what does your short-term memory loss have to do with today’s verse?” I’m glad you asked.

Widows and widowers are quickly forgotten. When their spouse dies, we all run to their home to console and love on them. However, after a few weeks, we forget about them. We get back into our routine and forget their routine has been forever altered. 

APPLICATION

Why don’t you get your family to “adopt” a widow or widower? Of course, you may have one in your own family to care for, but if you don’t, I am sure your church has a list of them who need someone to come alongside them. What a great way to teach your little Susie how to love others.

It’s the little things that are needed by them. Things a widow’s husband would have done around the house go undone. Even little things like changing that light bulb in the ceiling light are huge for them. For the widower, it might be missing those homecooked meals by his wife. Let your children help you as you minister to one of these on the list.

Who do you know right now who could use that kind of TLC? Give them a call and tell them you want to take them out to dinner this weekend. Drop by with your tool box and ask if they need anything done around the house. Ask them first. They will probably welcome the visit.

Father, forgive me when I overlook those who have such simple needs. I want You to use me to help them with these daily tasks. I know they are precious in Your sight.

Standard
Advice, Affection, Bible, Child Raising, Child Rearing, Commands, Disciplemaking, Encouragement, Family, Fatherhood, God's Will, Love, Mentoring, Modeling, Motherhood, Obedience, Parenting, Women

RESPONSIBILITIES

1 TIMOTHY 5:8

“But if anyone does not provide for his own, and especially for those of his household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.”

In Book Two of the Every Man A Warrior disciplemaking study, Lonnie Berger says this, “After becoming a Christian, marriage is the most life changing event in your life. When you marry, you give up your life in order to live it for someone else. You work for the other person. You begin to think about permanence, buying a house, saving for the future and providing for your children. You come to a whole new level of maturity.”

The phrase “does not provide” in today’s verse would lead you to think Paul is merely talking about food and shelter. No! The word actually has more to do with what Lonnie said. It’s about respecting your family. It’s about thinking about them first. It’s about acting according to God’s will on behalf of your family. That’s showing responsibility.

APPLICATION

Fathers, teach your sons to be men. Now, I am not taking ANYTHING away from the strength and power of women. We men would be doomed without them. But God intended for men to care for their families. The father is expected to provide for his family. Our society has downgraded that responsibility to the point that some men ignore that.

A real man loves his family. A real man comes home at night to his wife and children. A real man thinks about his family BEFORE he makes his plans. A real man consults his wife BEFORE he makes a purchase that can affect the household budget. A real man follows God.

Do you get the picture? Today’s blog is more directed toward the men, but ladies, you too have a responsibility to put your family before yourself. For most of you that is not a problem. But if it is, stop and correct that. And teach your children the same.

O God, thank You for my family. Thank You for convicting me when I become selfish in my time and energy. I want to please You as I care for my family.

Standard
Advice, Alone, Bible, Child Raising, Child Rearing, Commands, Death, Encouragement, Modeling, Money, Parenting

DEAD WOMAN WALKING

1 TIMOTHY 5:6

“But she who gives herself to wanton pleasure is dead even while she lives.”

Have you heard the expression “Dead Man Walking”? It implies someone who is alive but living and acting as if he is dead. He has a careless disregard for life. Death is just all over him and is ready to snatch him away. Well, today’s verse says the same thing about this widow, the one who chooses “wanton pleasure.”

Now, what is wanton pleasure and how do we help the widows we know not live like that? “Wanton pleasure” means to live extravagantly or luxuriously. It’s the widow who has no regard for the cost of things. She spends money like it grows on trees. Paul is not saying it’s bad to have money. He is saying it is sin to live with that mindset. 

APPLICATION

Teach your children the value of money now. If you begin early, they will understand when you say, “Honey, we just can’t afford that right now.” Some parents don’t want to ever tell their little Johnny or Susie no, so they give them anything they want. That will lead them to live like the widow in today’s verse.

Instead, help them earn some money through extra chores or small jobs around your house. When they are old enough help them get a job in the neighborhood mowing grass or babysitting. As they get older, they will be ready for that first part-time job in the community. However you do it, teach them that money is simply a tool God has given us to live. It’s not what we live for.

How do you see wealth? Did you know that money is mentioned over 2,000 times in the Scriptures? It must be important for the Lord to spend so much time talking about it. He wants us to understand why He blesses us with the resources to live. Take some time and do a word study on money. You may just learn something. I know I did.

I know all I have belongs to You. Thank You, Lord, for blessing me with the means to care for my family. Help me be more generous with the resources You have given me.

Standard
Bible, Child Raising, Child Rearing, Comfort, Commands, Direction, Disciplemaking, Encouragement, Family, Friends, God's Will, Grace, Love, Mentoring, Modeling, Obedience, Parenting, Widows, Women

HOW TO HONOR

1 TIMOTHY 5:3

“Honor widows who are widows indeed;” 

Do you know any widows? I am blessed to know a lot of widows. In fact, my widowed mother-in-law lives with my wife and I. I also know a group of widows at the church I serve. They call the group “Women of Grace.” They truly are that. So, when I read this verse, I asked myself if I am honoring them, as God’s Word commands.

First of all, this word “honor” is a command. We are commanded to do this. Secondly, this word means to “assign value (give honor), as it reflects the personal esteem (value, preciousness) attached to it by the beholder.” You will only honor what you value. 

APPLICATION

What or whom do your children honor? What do they place value in? If your child does not honor their elders, they must not place much value on them. But why should we teach them to do this? Well, perhaps because one day that might be you (the widow or widower). Do you want them to value you? Of course, you do.

But also, we teach them this because it is the right thing to do. Widows and widowers have lost their husband or wife and have that gap in the life. As fellow believers we are commanded to come alongside them and make them feel valued and honored for who they are. That is EXACTLY what Christ would do. In fact, He did just that. Even on the cross, He honored His mother by telling John to take care of her.

Is there a widow or widower in your life to whom you need to honor more? Today make an extra effort to do just that. Take them out for a meal. Give them a call. Drop by to say hello and pray with them. Somehow today let them know just how valued they are by you and by their heavenly Father. I promise you will be the one who is blessed by doing this.

Father, show me the widows to whom You want me to honor today. Feel their lives with joy, hope and blessings. Help me to see them as You do.

Standard
Advice, Bible, Child Raising, Child Rearing, Commands, Creation, Direction, Encouragement, Family, Fatherhood, God's Will, Mentoring, Modeling, Motherhood, Obedience, Parenting, Purity, Scripture, Women

TREAT THEM HOLY

1 TIMOTHY 5:2

“the older women as mothers, and the younger women as sisters, in all purity.”

Treating women special has been around a long time. God has always commanded it. Sin changes that. Look at today’s verse. Paul tells Timothy (and us) to treat women “in all purity.” That word comes from the Greek word for “holy.” Treat them as holy? Really?

Paul isn’t saying we should worship them. He is saying, though, that we should treat them as set apart by God according to His purpose and plan. All women deserve respect. But those who are seeking to follow the Lord in their daily life should also be treated as holy and pure. That’s what God intends for them all.

APPLICATION

As parents we need to instill in our little boys and little girls that girls are different than boys. There is NOTHING belittling about that statement. In fact, it’s meant to be just the opposite. We should let all our daughters, sisters and wives know just how God sees them. They should be treated that way – as special creations in the eyes of our God.

It is up to the husbands, brothers and fathers to do this, however. So, do me a favor. Challenge the men in your life to treat women this way. And dads, YOU have to model this to your sons. They will treat their mom and sisters how you do. They will treat their future wife the way you do. 

So, how are you doing with this? Ladies, do you see yourself as pure? Men, do you see the women in your life as pure? If not, reread today’s verse. This is a command, not a suggestion. If you need to change your view of women, start with God’s view and go no further.

Father, forgive me when I do not see ALL women as you do. Thank You for the godly women you have put in my life. I am blessed because of them.

Standard
Advice, Bible, Child Raising, Child Rearing, Commands, Disciplemaking, Encouragement, Eternity, Gifts, God's Will, Mentoring, Modeling, Obedience, Parenting, Sanctification, Thanksgiving

PONDERING

1 TIMOTHY 4:15

“Take pains with these things; be absorbed in them, so that your progress will be evident to all.” 

Now, that’s a word you don’t use every day – pondering! That’s another translation for the verb “take pains.” The word means to be diligent about something. It’s only used one other time in the NT (Acts 4:25) when Peter and John quote Psalm 2:1-2. In that instance it is a negative use, but here in 1 Timothy it’s a good thing. Ponder, be diligent about using your spiritual gift.

If someone gave you an incredible gift, would you squirrel it away and never show anyone? If you learned how to cure cancer for everyone, would you keep that to yourself? Of course not! And your spiritual gift is greater than both of those things. Your spiritual gift being exercised could lead someone to a decision to accept Christ, thus altering their eternity!

APPLICATION

The best way to teach your children this verse is by living it yourself. If you have the gift of service, serve! And take your children along with you when you do so they know why you are doing what you are doing. If you have the gift of discernment, make sure your kids know when you use that gift and how. When they see you using your gifts to glorify God and build up the Body, they will be inspired to do the same.

There are many gifts. There are many lists of gifts in the New Testament. Let me encourage you to help your child learn which gift God has given them. It may not be the same gift as yours, which will require you to learn more about how they need to use their gift. None of us have arrived. We are all still progressing towards perfection in and through Christ.

How will you use your spiritual gift today? It isn’t just for Sundays. It isn’t just for your church. Use it wherever and whenever the Lord leads you. By being obedient in that and pondering on it, you will please the Father.

I am so grateful for the gifts you have given to us, Father. You give these gifts to be used and managed well. Help me use my gifts today to honor Your name.

Standard
Bible, Child Raising, Child Rearing, Commands, Completeness, Direction, Disciplemaking, Encouragement, Eternity, Gifts, God's Will, Holy Spirit, Hope, Inspirational, Modeling, Obedience, Parenting, Scripture, Thanksgiving

YOU’VE GOT A GIFT

1 TIMOTHY 4:14

“Do not neglect the spiritual gift within you, which was bestowed on you through prophetic utterance with the laying on of hands by the presbytery.” 

Don’t you just love getting gifts? I mean, even the smallest of gifts can be so exciting, especially when they are unexpected. The old saying goes “It’s the thought that counts.” That may be true, but that gift counts too, lol.

As a believer in Christ, we receive spiritual gifts from the Father when we accept Christ as our Savior. Strong’s Concordance defines this word as “divinely empowers a believer to share God’s work with others, i.e. Spirit-empowered service to the Church to carry out His plan for His people.” So, these are gifts you receive for one purpose – to share with others.

APPLICATION

Try this with your little Johnny or Susie. Give them a gift but explain to them that they have to share it with their siblings. What kind of response to you think you will get? Depending on the gift, you may get a “Sure Dad, I’ll be glad to do that” or “What!? This is mine. They can get their own.”

It’s not about the sharing, though, with spiritual gifts. It’s about benefitting someone else. You see, our spiritual gifts actually help others grow spiritually. Our gifts never run out. We can’t exhaust them. They come from above, so the power source is eternal.

What is your gift? Are you sharing it? God wants you to use your gift (and if you are believer, you have one) to build the Body of Christ. He wants you to exercise that gift in a way that blesses the church and those in it. He wants you to enjoy using your gift. If you don’t know your gift, talk to your Pastor. He can help you find a good Spiritual Gifts Inventory to use to help you.

Father, thank You for the gifts You have empowered me with to help others grow. I do enjoy using those gifts. But more importantly I love pleasing You with my obedience.

Standard