Category Archives: Parenting

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GENTLENESS

2 TIMOTHY 2:25

“with gentleness correcting those who are in opposition, if perhaps God may grant them repentance leading to the knowledge of the truth,”

When I think of gentleness I think of someone who understands their strength and how to use it correctly. It is not weakness. The Greek word here, prautes, means strength with reserve. This only comes through the Lord. He sends His Holy Spirit into our lives to give us this ability to show gentleness even to those who are opposing us.

Now, wait a minute. It’s one thing to be gentle to those we love. How can you do that to people who are opposing you, who are hostile to you? Well, the beauty of it is, you don’t have to. Jesus will live through you to accomplish that gentle response. He will guard your tongue. He will… Get the picture?

APPLICATION

Okay, Mom and Dad, here’s the hard part. YOU have to live out this gentleness with your children. “But Carl, you don’t know my kid.” That’s true, but God does. There is nothing your child can say or do which can remove your authority and obvious power. But far too many parents think they have to show that power. No! Gentleness is the answer.

So, what do I mean by that. I mean when you are having to deal with an out of control child, Jesus can and will give you the gentleness you need. Soothing words rather screams. Soft touches rather than harsh grabs. I know, I know! You are still saying, “Not with my kid.” Well, don’t believe me. Believe God. His Word is true.

Are you a gentle person? Do you exude gentleness to those around you? Jesus had the power of God (He was and is God) in His fingertips. He could have destroyed His enemies with the breath of His mouth. He chose gentleness. Imitate Him. Let Jesus be your gentle spirit.

O God, thank You for giving me a gentle spirit when I need it most. Let me be a reflection of You to others.

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Bible, Child Raising, Child Rearing, Commands, Disciplemaking, Encouragement, Faithfulness, Gentleness, Holy Spirit, Mentoring, Modeling, Obedience, Parenting, Scripture, Service

SERVANT QUALITIES

VERSE OF THE DAY: 2 TIMOTHY 2:24

“The Lord’s bond-servant must not be quarrelsome, but be kind to all, able to teach, patient when wronged,”

Paul spells it out pretty clear here as to what the Lord expects from His servants. They can’t be argumentative (word fighting). They should be kind. That word can also be translated as gentle. It’s used only here in the New Testament. It means to do everything according to God’s Will. Then Paul says they should be able to teach. Teach what? His Word. And he wraps up this by saying they should be patient when wronged. This word also appears only here. It means just that – you don’t retaliate when wronged.

Now, that’s a good list of qualities the Lord wants to see in us. Do we do that all the time? Of course not. We aren’t mind-numbed robots. We have good days and bad days. But we should be striving to be more and more like Jesus every day. He didn’t quarrel. He was kind to all. He was able to teach. And He was definitely patient when wronged.

APPLICATION

Which one of these qualities do you see in your child? One, two or none? Listen closely. You can’t instill these qualities. Only the Holy Spirit can. Your job is to nurture them in their walk with  the Lord. I know you have to deal with some of the opposite behaviors. When they fuss and quarrel, you have to stop that. Use this verse.

But the best way, as usual, for your child to learn these qualities is by seeing them lived out. You are the one they watch. So, are you kind and patient? “Now, wait a minute, Carl. This isn’t about me.” Are you kidding me? It’s all about you. You are the most important adult in your child’s life. Live like you want them to live.

Are you a bond-servant of the Lord? Have you chosen to serve Him? A bond-servant was marked by putting a hole in his earlobe. When you saw that you knew this person had chosen to remain with his master. He is free to go, but chooses to stay. Hmmm. Is that you? Or do you fight with God every step of the way?

Father God, I choose You. I choose a life of servitude to my gracious and holy Lord. I praise You for leading me.

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HOW TO AVOID A FIGHT

2 TIMOTHY 2:23

“But refuse foolish and ignorant speculations, knowing that they produce quarrels.”

Some people are just looking for a fight. They say things to try to get someone else stirred up. They choose their words carefully in order to lure another person into a fight, usually to make themselves look better. Paul is warning Timothy to refuse that, to walk away, to stay out of those arguments.

You have to decide yourself on that. You may like the arguing. You may like the back and forth verbal exchanges. But if this talk does not glorify the Lord, then it is empty, foolish and ignorant words. Having lived in Ephesus, where Timothy was residing, he knew how the Ephesians delighted in debate. He didn’t want Timothy wasting time in these endless pursuits.

APPLICATION

This is a hard one for kids. If you have more than one child in the home, you have undoubtedly experienced foolish and ignorant speculations that led to quarrels, lol. Keeping these quarrels to a minimum can be a tiresome task. But the second you hear two children arguing, read them this verse and ask them this question – “How does this discussion bring glory to our Lord?”

You see, our focus should be to continually point them towards the Father. If we do that and follow our lead, they will be able to avoid these useless arguments. This skill will be so beneficial as an adult when they grow up. They may not understand it all now, but one day they will.

Are you one of those people looking for a fight? Why do we do that? Maybe it’s because we want to prove we are right. Perhaps it’s because we want to prove the other person wrong. Either way, glory isn’t given to the Lord. Surround yourself with like-minded people and avoid those people who can’t wait to quarrel and debate. Life’s too short. 

O Lord, keep my mouth shut when appropriate. Thank You for the wisdom to know how to respond to those who have no desire to glorify You. Today I will not quarrel or debate.

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Advice, Child Raising, Child Rearing, Commands, Direction, Encouragement, Modeling, Parenting, Peace, Righteousness, Sanctification, Testimony

RUN!!!

2 TIMOTHY 2:22

“Now flee from youthful lusts and pursue righteousness, faith, love and peace, with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart.”

Too many of us try to resist or fight our youthful lusts. No!!! Paul tells Timothy and us to flee, to run away, to get out of Dodge. We tend to think we can play with matches and not get burned. Listen, my brother or sister, you cannot! That’s why Paul tells Timothy to run. He tells us the same thing.

And as we are running from those youthful lusts, we need to be pursuing righteous, faith, love and peace. We already have all of those, if we are believers. They are all centered in and through Christ whom we possess at the moment of salvation. However, we allow ourselves to pursue other things and drop it.

APPLICATION

Most kids are good at following orders. Not really, lol. I mean, inside they want to please you and God. All they have to do is listen to what you say and do it, right? All they have to do is read God’s Word and do what it says, right? What if you read them this verse and told them when they are tempted to do something wrong to run? What do you think they would do?

Make a game of it. Write out some of these “youthful lusts.” What are those? Well, they do involve sensual pleasures, but they also include things like the inclination to gratify the appetites and senses of the body. They even include things like  pride, ambition, vain-glory, rashness, contention, obstinacy. These things make young people obnoxious. Mix in some good things like faith, hope and love. Use your imagination. Hold up one of the cards and have them either run toward you for a hug or run away.

But let me ask you a question. How do you respond to these things? Do you run towards these lusts or away? Do you shun them or embrace them? We adults must have the same flight response as children. These things will defeat us and cripple our walk with Christ. Pursue the good stuff and soar.

You are an amazing God who gives us everything we need to succeed in our walk with You. Help me today to listen closely to You and allow You to lead me away from those things that seek to harm me.

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CLEANSE THYSELF

2 TIMOTHY 2:21

“Therefore, if anyone cleanses himself from these things, he will be a vessel for honor, sanctified, useful to the Master, prepared for every good work.”

We really can’t do this. No one has the ability cleanse themselves spiritually. But Paul isn’t telling us to do that. This word “cleanses” is used here and over in 1 Corinthians 5:7. That’s it. In 1 Corinthians it used to describe getting rid of the old leaven. That’s his point.

We must choose to live a holy, sanctified life. That requires us to keep holy the things that are holy. We have to separate ourselves from people and situations that we know will work to tear us down. We can’t isolate ourselves, but we must make tough choices regarding our “influencers.”

APPLICATION

Kids have to make choices every day. Parents who make all the choices for them cripple them. It’s a control thing, I know. It’s much easier to do it for them and speed up the process. But if we don’t show them how to make difficult and hard choices when they are young, they won’t make them when they are older.

Why do we want them to cleanse themselves? So they will be useful to the Master. There’s something about a useless vessel. What happens to it? It’s either destroyed to make room for the useful or it is shelved out of mind. Invest in the time it takes to show your children how to make those hard decisions. Let them fail safely, too. They will learn a lot that way.

Are you willing to cast out all the leaven in your life? Are you able to make those hard choices? Those are necessary decisions for your spiritual growth. And the second you make that choice to be useful to the Master, He shows you how and where. Isn’t that cool? He wants to use us to further His kingdom.

I want to be used by You, Lord. Keep me focused on pleasing You, not man. Then I can give You all of me.

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Advice, Child Raising, Child Rearing, Completeness, Contentment, Disciplemaking, Encouragement, Faithfulness, Family, Godliness, Life, Modeling, Obedience, Parenting, Service

MY DAD’S TEA GLASS

2 TIMOTHY 2:20

“Now in a large house there are not only gold and silver vessels, but also vessels of wood and of earthenware, and some to honor and some to dishonor.”

When I was growing up in my parents’ home, my dad had a special gold colored tea glass. That was his glass. We knew not to use it and for goodness sake, when we were washing it (yes, we hand-washed dishes back then), not to break it. That glass pretty much stayed full of sweet, iced tea in the refrigerator and by his chair in the evening. He did love his tea.

That glass was nothing special. I mean, we actually had nicer glasses in the house. But that glass served its purpose as my dad’s tea glass. Each of us have our purpose in the body of Christ. We may think some roles are more important or look nicer, but each and every role serves the purpose it is designed to do for the body of Christ. We should not look down on someone who is fulfilling the “wooden” or “earthenware” roles.

APPLICATION

This is so important to teach our children. In fact, I truly feel it is important for our children to have several of those “wooden” or “earthenware” roles in the family as they grow up. Taking out the trash is certainly NOT a “golden” role, but let that job not get done for a few days and see what happens. How about cleaning the bathrooms? Let that go undone for a week or two, and no one will want to go in there.

We teach our children these lessons in the home so they understand that in other areas of life. In the church or in school, they will have the opportunity to serve in a variety of roles. Keeping that servant’s heart in whatever role they fill will give them opportunities to be Jesus to others. Isn’t that our goal – to teach them to be more like Him?

How is your attitude when you are asked to roll up your sleeves and perform a menial task? Do you think you are above that or do you dive right in? Take the opportunity to serve wherever you are and however you can. Don’t let your ego or pride get in the way of receiving a blessing from someone you have the chance to serve.

Thank You, Lord, for giving me plenty of opportunities to serve You by serving others. Help me to not ever think I am above the job. I want to exemplify You in my service.

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Advice, Bible, Child Raising, Child Rearing, Comfort, Contentment, Encouragement, Family, Parenting

NEVERTHELESS

2 TIMOTHY 2:19

“Nevertheless, the firm foundation of God stands, having this seal, ‘The Lord knows those who are His,’ and, ‘Everyone who names the name of the Lord is to abstain from wickedness.’”

“Nevertheless” is probably a word you don’t use much. I know it doesn’t come up much in my conversations. But I was surprised to find out it is only used eight times in the New Testament. I expected to see it used more. It refers to a contrast. It can mean however, instead, but, yet and nevertheless.  “Big deal, Carl! This devotion is not exciting me.” Well, hold on.

Read the verses before this (vs 14-18). Paul is painting a huge contrast here in verse 19. Although the world may be against us and is trying to destroy us, GOD’S FOUNDATION IS FIRM!!! Wow! No matter what, God is there. No matter what, God knows us. No matter what, we must abstain from wickedness. No matter what!!

APPLICATION

Your little ones are going to face hard times. There is just no way to completely insulate them from pain and suffering. This is one of those verses to remind them it’s okay. When they have worked hard to achieve something, and it is unfairly taken away – Nevetheless. When they are doing all the right things, but someone else gets the credit – Nevertheless.

Dealing with “unfair” things in life is…well…just part of life. We don’t need life to be fair because we have a fair God. His “fairness” completely balances out the scales of injustice, if we will just trust Him with the big picture. We may not get exactly what we want, but He will make sure we get exactly what we need. “Nevertheless” is a big word after all, huh?

Have you experienced one of those nevertheless moments in your life? How did that feel? Isn’t it exciting to know that God is forever watchful over your life? He truly does care about the most minute detail. Your small problems make His list. Your seemingly unimportant events are on His calendar.

I praise You, O God, that You bend Your ear to hear my voice. You stoop down to earth to bind my wounds. You lean towards me to comfort me.

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OUT OF LINE

2 TIMOTHY 2:18

“men who have gone astray from the truth saying that the resurrection has already taken place, and they upset the faith of some.”

Have you ever known someone who was just out of line? I mean, someone who deliberately said something or did something that everyone could see was not right. Maybe you have done that. Well, the phrase “have gone astray” in today’s verse carries that meaning. It is only used three times in Scripture (here, 1 Timothy 1:6; 6:21), each time by Paul writing to Timothy.

Now, listen to this definition. It means to be out of step with God, to be off target. But it’s more than that. The word has the understanding that this person has purposely walked off the line with God. They didn’t get pushed off. In fact, this word also emphasizes God’s disapproval due to their walking off.

APPLICATION

Raising children isn’t for the weak of heart. Can I get an “Amen”? I’ve said it many times, “We are not raising children. We are raising child raisers.” And there is nothing more important than to teach our children to walk with God. So, when a parent comes to me, heartbroken, because their son or daughter have decided to walk away from the faith, I can feel their pain.

Walking is simple. It’s just putting one foot in front of another. Walking with God can be just as simple – if – we let Him do all the walking. All we have to do is hold His hand. Better yet, all we have to do is place our hand in His. He will hold onto us.

Have you deliberately walked off? Are you walking hand in hand? Take a moment and make sure that every step you take is in sync with the Lord. Don’t take one step without knowing your walk is His walk. His direction will always be right.

I can’t begin to know where You are leading me, Lord. So, I will stay on the path You have laid out before me. Lead me, Lord.

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Advice, Bible, Child Raising, Child Rearing, Deception, Parenting, Purity, Sanctification, Satan, Scripture

GANGRENE

2 TIMOTHY 2:17

“and their talk will spread like gangrene. Among them are Hymenaeus and Philetus,”

What is a gangrene? Medically, it is a condition where an infection gets so bad that it begins to destroy surrounding tissue and bone. The body literally starts to kill itself. So, how does this apply to us in today’s verse. Oh beloved, look closely. When the body of Christ allows the poison of the world (look at verse 16) to remain in its midst, that poison, that infection, will begin to destroy it from within.

The only cure for gangrene is extreme purification of the area. It can lead to actual amputation of toes, fingers or even whole limbs. All the dead tissue must go. It is full of poison. The same goes for the body of Christ. Those who are poisoning the body can’t remain. They have no desire for healing, only killing. They are NOT a part of the healthy body. Ouch! That’s hard.

APPLICATION

I bet your little boy or girl has at some point gotten an infection. Perhaps they have gotten something stuck in their finger or toe which led to an infection. They could see the splinter in there but couldn’t get to it. What a perfect way to explain this verse. That splinter has to come out for healing to occur. That foreign object, which has no purpose in their body, must be removed.

Explain to them that there will be people who will shove themselves into their lives who have one motive – to harm them. Once your child becomes a child of God (and I pray they have all done that) Satan cannot stand that. He can’t “unsave” them, but he will certainly do all he can to try to make them useless to the kingdom. That includes sending that “splinter” into their lives to produce infection. The remedy? Stay purified through the Word of God, remaining watchful for those whose words do not line up with it.

Are you suffering from gangrene right now? Do you have a Hymenaeus and Philetus in your life? These were two individuals who were in the church but were not part of it. They produced gangrene, not life. If you find yourself in the presence of such people, remove yourself. “Amputate” yourself from the surrounding infection. You cannot live for Christ in the midst of it. Choose healing and health.

I want to purify my body, soul and spirit, Lord, daily through You. Help me cut out all the infection in my life so I can stay strong and healthy spiritually. Today I choose to excise anything that reeks of infection.

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STOP TALKING LIKE THAT

2 TIMOTHY 2:16

“But avoid worldly and empty chatter, for it will lead to further ungodliness,”

I just love the way the Holy Spirit led the writers of Scripture to use certain words. Take for instance the Greek word “worldly” in today’s verse. It is only used five times in the New Testament. Four of those times it is used by Paul writing to Timothy in his two letters to him. It means unauthorized access to something. It refers to people who are not fit to know God because they approach Him without faith. That was the kind of place Timothy was living. Sounds familiar.

And then we have the phrase “empty chatter” which is one Greek word and means babble or just hollow or empty talk. It’s only used here. Paul is telling Timothy to stay away from that kind of useless talk. It’s meaningless and just wastes time. Are you guilty of doing that?

APPLICATION

How do we teach our children this? The Lord doesn’t expect us to spend all our time speaking King James English and quoting verses. That is not what Paul is saying here. But our minds should be focused on the eternal. When we allow our minds to be cluttered with useless, trivial, worldly pursuits, we forget about the Lord and His purpose in our lives.

That’s why we teach our children to memorize His Word. That’s why we may ask, “What would Jesus do?” When we teach our children to keep that focus in our conversations, always running in the back of our mind, our thoughts are on Him. When we surrender our tongues to Him, He will give us the words to say.

I had to have my trucked towed recently, twice within about a two-hour span. I had the same tow truck driver the second time. When he got in the cab of his truck after loading my truck, he turned to me and jokingly said, “I bet you are ready to cuss this time.” Fortunately, I allowed the Spirit to speak and said, “This is just a temporal thing, brother. That truck’s not eternal. No biggie.” He was shocked, and I was able to share why I could say that with him. Watch your focus. Temporal or eternal?

Lord, You are my focus. I will not waste my time on empty, worldly conversations. I will approach You boldly because I am known by You and I know You.

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