Advice, Bible, Child Raising, Child Rearing, Comfort, Commands, Encouragement, Family, Love, Ministry, Modeling, Parenting, Service, Widows

BE OF ASSISTANCE

1 TIMOTHY 5:16

If any woman who is a believer has dependent widows, she must assist them and the church must not be burdened, so that it may assist those who are widows indeed.”

I have an Administrative Assistant. She is awesome! She makes me look good in so many ways by all the “little” things she does for our Children’s Ministry. I put little in quotes because nothing she does is really little. Her job is to assist me and our other staff and volunteers fulfill the calling to serve our children and their families.

So many today think being an assistant is below them. But right here in this passage, Paul tells Timothy how important it is to lend assistance. That’s what an assistant does – lends assistance. In fact, this Greek word for “assist” only occurs right here in verse 16 (two times) and in verse 10 we saw earlier. It’s not our job to take care of the widows who have families. That’s their job. We, the church, need to be free to assist those who have no one.

APPLICATION

Can you think of a way your little Johnny or Susie could assist someone today? Depending on the age of your children, they could help clean a widow’s house for them. Perhaps they could mow or rake their yard. I promise you the widows you know have a long list of things that need to be done.

Ask your church for a name of a widow or widower who could use some assistance. If this person does not have family around, you and your children could become that for them. People need people. Sometimes the best assistance you can give them is just some time spent with them. We can all find fifteen to thirty minutes a week for that.

Whom is the Lord calling you to assist? Are you willing to do that? You will be blessed for more than they will. The Lord blesses those who serve others, especially if it is done with a pure heart. Assist that person without any expectations of gratitude. Just do it for Jesus.

It is so pleasing to assist others. Lord, show me those whom You would have me invest my time and energy in. I want to honor You by serving them.

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SIGN THEM UP

1 TIMOTHY 5:9

“A widow is to be put on the list only if she is not less than sixty years old, having been the wife of one man,” 

I’m a list maker. I didn’t used to be. After my bout with chemo several years ago I lost some of my short-term memory skills. So, now I have to make lists or poof – that thought vanishes. You are probably asking yourself, “Carl, what does your short-term memory loss have to do with today’s verse?” I’m glad you asked.

Widows and widowers are quickly forgotten. When their spouse dies, we all run to their home to console and love on them. However, after a few weeks, we forget about them. We get back into our routine and forget their routine has been forever altered. 

APPLICATION

Why don’t you get your family to “adopt” a widow or widower? Of course, you may have one in your own family to care for, but if you don’t, I am sure your church has a list of them who need someone to come alongside them. What a great way to teach your little Susie how to love others.

It’s the little things that are needed by them. Things a widow’s husband would have done around the house go undone. Even little things like changing that light bulb in the ceiling light are huge for them. For the widower, it might be missing those homecooked meals by his wife. Let your children help you as you minister to one of these on the list.

Who do you know right now who could use that kind of TLC? Give them a call and tell them you want to take them out to dinner this weekend. Drop by with your tool box and ask if they need anything done around the house. Ask them first. They will probably welcome the visit.

Father, forgive me when I overlook those who have such simple needs. I want You to use me to help them with these daily tasks. I know they are precious in Your sight.

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FORSAKEN BUT FAITHFUL

1 TIMOTHY 5:5

Now she who is a widow indeed and who has been left alone, has fixed her hope on God and continues in entreaties and prayers night and day.” 

That may seem like a strange title for a blog, but that is exactly what this widow was. To be “left alone” literally means forsaken. But despite that, she continues in her faith. She prays specifically for needs and prays generally for others. She knows her only source of help and comfort comes from above.

Do you know a prayer warrior like that? I do. In fact, I know several. Their solace is in spending time with the Lord, studying His Word and talking to Him. They know He will never leave them or forsake them. They may be “alone” in this world, but they are never alone spiritually.

APPLICATION

Children need to learn this peace early. They need to know that our God and Father will never leave them, if they are one His children. They may think they are alone and the world is against them. But He never leaves their side. Drive that truth into Him. They need to hear that over and over again.

Do you ever have to leave your child to go on trips? I am sure that is hard on them and you. When you come home there are kisses and hugs, right? Just think of this – God is always with us giving us those kinds of hugs and kisses. Now, I don’t mean physical hugs and kisses. But His presence is just as soothing and intimate.

Do you feel His presence in your prayer life? Do you spend the time you need to each day to commune with your holy God. He is waiting to talk to you. He won’t barge in on you. He waits for you to come to Him, but He’s always ready. Isn’t that unbelievable?  

Father, thank You for always being there for me. I praise You for your steadfast love and compassion and the way You show it each and every day to me.

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PAYBACK CAN BE A GOOD THING

1 TIMOTHY 5:4

but if any widow has children or grandchildren, they must first learn to practice piety in regard to their own family and to make some return to their parents; for this is acceptable in the sight of God.”

I’ve said a number of times how important it is to respect our elders. In today’s verse, we see it again. Paul is telling Timothy that the care of the widows belongs to their family first. Sons, daughters, grandsons and granddaughters have the first responsibility to care for their widowed parent or grandparent. 

I mean, look at the last phrase of this verse – “for this is acceptable in the sight of God.” This word “acceptable” is only used twice in the New Testament, both times in 1 Timothy (2:3 and 5:4). It means to be gladly received because it is pleasing. You see, when we care for our widowed parent, it pleases God. Who doesn’t want to hear that?

APPLICATION

I truly believe children will take care of their parents in the same way their parents took care of them, for the most part. If we are loving and nurturing to our children, when we are old and in need, they will be loving and nurturing. If we are harsh and cruel, well guess what. They will be harsh and cruel.

God intends for family to care for family. The church steps in to assist when the family isn’t there or refuses to help. Your children can be taught to care for the widows now. Contact your church and ask if there are any widows or widowers who need to be visited. Most churches have a long list. Call and make plans to visit them. It may seem awkward the first time, but your children will brighten their day.

Are you willing to care for your family’s widows? Who in your family needs you right now? Don’t let someone else pick up your God given responsibility. Be obedient and see how pleased God is. Remember, you are doing this not so much for your family member. You are doing it for the Lord.

Thank You Lord, for allowing me to care for those in my family who need me. Remind me that this is all for You, not them. I want to please You.

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HOW TO HONOR

1 TIMOTHY 5:3

“Honor widows who are widows indeed;” 

Do you know any widows? I am blessed to know a lot of widows. In fact, my widowed mother-in-law lives with my wife and I. I also know a group of widows at the church I serve. They call the group “Women of Grace.” They truly are that. So, when I read this verse, I asked myself if I am honoring them, as God’s Word commands.

First of all, this word “honor” is a command. We are commanded to do this. Secondly, this word means to “assign value (give honor), as it reflects the personal esteem (value, preciousness) attached to it by the beholder.” You will only honor what you value. 

APPLICATION

What or whom do your children honor? What do they place value in? If your child does not honor their elders, they must not place much value on them. But why should we teach them to do this? Well, perhaps because one day that might be you (the widow or widower). Do you want them to value you? Of course, you do.

But also, we teach them this because it is the right thing to do. Widows and widowers have lost their husband or wife and have that gap in the life. As fellow believers we are commanded to come alongside them and make them feel valued and honored for who they are. That is EXACTLY what Christ would do. In fact, He did just that. Even on the cross, He honored His mother by telling John to take care of her.

Is there a widow or widower in your life to whom you need to honor more? Today make an extra effort to do just that. Take them out for a meal. Give them a call. Drop by to say hello and pray with them. Somehow today let them know just how valued they are by you and by their heavenly Father. I promise you will be the one who is blessed by doing this.

Father, show me the widows to whom You want me to honor today. Feel their lives with joy, hope and blessings. Help me to see them as You do.

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SEARED

1 TIMOTHY 4:2

by means of the hypocrisy of liars seared in their own conscience as with a branding iron,”

I had to ask myself why the Holy Spirit instructed Paul to use this image. The phrase “seared…as with a branding iron” is one Greek word. It is used once right here in this verse and has the meaning of cauterizing or branding with a branding iron. You have probably seen pictures of cattle being branded. 

Well, besides leaving a permanent scar on the skin, what does branding do? It makes that spot totally unsensitive. The nerve endings are dead. They have been seared. In other words, Paul is using this word to show what false teaching will do to your soul. It will make you unsensitive to the reality of sin. You will begin to feel no remorse or guilt. 

APPLICATION

Have you or your child ever burned your finger on something hot? You move quickly to stop the burn with cold water or ice, don’t you? What a great way to talk about this verse with your child. Explain how the first time that spot is burned there is a lot pain and discomfort and you want to fix it. But if you keep burning the same spot, it will stop hurting. In fact, you won’t even know you’ve burned it again.

That’s how sin works. That’s how false teaching works. The more we let it touch us, the less bothered we are by it. Before we know it, sin just doesn’t bother us. We see it all around us today. What used to be called sin is called a person’s choice. What used to be unacceptable in society is now embraced as normal. We have been seared by a hot iron.

How about your life? Have you become numb to the discomfort of sin? Does it not bother you anymore? Ask the Lord to reveal your sins to you in a powerful way. Ask Him to let you see your sins as He sees them. Then you will see the horror in them. Then you will feel the “pain” of sin. Only then can you understand how far you have slipped. Return to Him and ask for healing.

I don’t want to not feel the pain of sin. I want to know the depth of Your forgiveness in my life which is only possible as I recognize the depravity of my sin. I thank You for healing me of my sin wounds.

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ONE STEP HIGHER

1 TIMOTHY 3:13

“For those who have served well as deacons obtain for themselves a high standing and great confidence in the faith that is in Christ Jesus.”

We find another one-time used word in today’s verse. The Greek word “standing” is only used right here in the Bible.  It literally means a step on the staircase, going one step higher. Figuratively, it implies someone who has made a higher rank or higher position. That may imply something that Paul never intended.

If you look at this verse in context of all the qualifications for a deacon, you will get an idea of Paul’s meaning here. Deacons who serve well will be given more important roles to serve the body. By serving well they have shown they are trustworthy and are ready to do even more. It may also imply they are worthy of being considered as elders, a higher “office” in the church.

APPLICATION

“Okay, Carl, tell me how to teach this verse to my children.” Glad you asked. Children need to earn the right to be trusted with some things. We don’t just give a five-year-old a laptop and set them free. We don’t give a thirteen-year-old the privilege of a cellphone unless we know we can trust them to use it wisely.

Some things are gained by being obedient in the small things. Jesus even taught that. By growing in our faith and experiencing trials, we learn how to help others going through similar times. Our children need to be taught that their small steps of faith now will prepare them for those “leaps of faith” that are coming. And by being proven trustworthy now, they can be given greater responsibilities in the future.

Do you clamor for more? Do you want to be recognized for your achievements? Then do it all for Jesus. By surrendering your will to His, the Lord may just bless you with opportunities. Remember what Joshua 1:8 says. “‘“This book of the law shall not depart from your mouth, but you shall meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do according to all that is written in it; for then you will make your way prosperous, and then you will have success.’”

All I want is to please You, Lord. If that means I serve lower than the rest, that’s fine. If it means I am entrusted with greater responsibilities, so be it. My joy comes from serving You.

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CAREGIVER

1 TIMOTHY 3:5

“(but if a man does not know how to manage his own household, how will he take care of the church of God?),”

Paul continues his qualifications for an elder in today’s verse with an explanation of the previous verse. This verse tells us why it is important for a man to manage his household properly. If he can’t, he sure can’t “take care” of the church. Now, just wait until you hear about the Greek word for “take care.” It is so cool.

This Greek word is only used three times in the New Testament. It is used here and two times in Luke 10:34-35. Here is the cool part – that is the story of the good Samaritan. Do you remember that story? He took care of the Jewish man beaten by robbers and left for dead. He even paid the inn keeper to take care of him once he left. That is how an elder is supposed to take care of the church, and he can’t do that if his own house is not in order.

APPLICATION

Okay, you know where I am going with this, don’t you? You have to jump back to the Good Samaritan story to explain this word and verse to little Elrod and Gertrude. They will get that. You can even act out the story with you. You can show them how to “take care” of someone. They will love it.

Then, once they have a good picture of this, take them back to today’s verse and explain how a good leader in the church does the same thing for those in the church. He helps bind their spiritual wounds and enlists others to help.

Are you a caregiver? Do you even care how your church family is doing? So many of us just go to church and go home. We don’t get involved in each other’s lives. But we need to. We need to care for those who hurting. We need to care for those who are going through some kind of trial. Will you care today?

You are the greatest caregiver, Lord. Help me see what You are doing and just get involved in it. I want to please You in all I do.

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HOUSEHOLD

1 TIMOTHY 3:4

He must be one who manages his own household well, keeping his children under control with all dignity”

I bet when you read this verse you picture a man who keeps his children in line. He runs a tight ship. He doesn’t put up with backtalk and misbehavior. Well, the Greek word “manages” actually puts the responsibility on the man, not the children.  

This word “manages” has the idea of “influencing people byhaving a respected reputation. This happens by setting the example of excellence by living in faith.” In other words, he manages his household by setting the example, not by demanding obedience. His family WANTS to follow him.

APPLICATION

How do you get your children to mind you? Do you set a bunch of rules and demand they be followed? Well, that’s one way. But it is probably not the best one. When you set the example for your little Susie or Johnny, they will learn by watching you. Your behavior is much more influential than your words.

If you want your kids to clean their rooms, clean yours. If you want them pick up after themselves, do the same. If you want them to talk in a respectful manner, try it yourself. “Managing” is more about leading than pushing. Kids will follow you anywhere if they know they can trust you.

Are you a manager or a pusher? Ask the Lord to give you the ability to lead well. Your children’s future depends on you leading them in the areas that will affect them for life. They need to see you modeling what you expect from them. In other’s word, quoting “Do as I say, not as I do” just won’t cut it.

O Lord, help me lead well. Help me show others how to walk the walk. I want to be an example for others to follow.

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CHILD BEARING

1 TIMOTHY 2:15

“But women will be preserved through the bearing of children if they continue in faith and love and sanctity with self-restraint.”

I have to admit something. I don’t fully understand every verse of the Bible (big surprise, right?). And today’s verse is one of those. There are as many interpretations of this verse as there are commentators. I don’t have the time or space in this devotional to argue every one of them. So, I am going to give it my best shot with the warning to check it out yourself.

The word “women” is not in the original. This verse is actually referring back to Eve in verse 14, but has reference to all women in the last part. Paul seems to be attempting to back off the harsh words of the previous verses. Women were the vessel the Lord used to bring forth the Messiah. Women have the incredible responsibility of child bearing and rearing. And that is done through self-restraint as they practice faith, love and sanctity.

APPLICATION

Okay, here is the challenge. How do you apply this verse to your children?  Well, Paul is NOT saying that your little Gertrude’s sole role is child bearing. Children don’t “complete” a woman anymore than marrying does. They are not saved by giving birth to children. But, if the Lord allows them the privilege of children, He has a duty for them. They are to practice faith, love and sanctity with self-restraint.

What is self-restraint? It actually means soundness of mind, sanity, self-control, or sobriety. The word was used previously in 1 Timothy 2:9 where it was translated “self-control.” So perhaps the lesson is not about child bearing at all. It’s more about learning to exercise self-restraint. That can only be done through the power of the Holy Spirit in their lives.

Are you showing self-restraint? In your walk with Christ, are you continuing in faith, love and sanctity with self-restraint? This admonition applies to all believers, not just the female ones. Men need self-restraint just as much as women, maybe more. Allow the Holy Spirit to control you so you can show the world how a believer lives.

Lord, I am thankful I don’t have to fully understand every verse of Scripture. I know as I am able to grasp its truths You will reveal the hidden treasures to me. Thank You.

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