Category Archives: Child Rearing

Advice, Bible, Child Raising, Child Rearing, Commands, Death, Deception, Direction, Eternity, God's Will, Love, Mentoring, Obedience, Parenting, Satan

TURNING ASIDE

1 TIMOTHY 5:15

“for some have already turned aside to follow Satan.” 

What a sad statement! “For some have already turned aside.” It literally means to turn away from one thing or person to follow another. That’s what they have done. They have chosen to follow Satan. Now, this is not a devotional on losing your salvation. That’s for another time. 

Some people think they can play both sides, but the instant you turn towards Satan, you turn away from Jesus. You cannot follow Satan and follow Jesus. You cannot please Satan and please Jesus. You have to choose. Choose wisely because this is an eternal decision.

APPLICATION

Children will follow easily. That’s why it is so important for you to teach them who to follow. If you don’t, the world will. The world is appealing and exciting. Who doesn’t want to follow that? It has all the bells and whistles. 

Teach your children that all that looks exciting is not. They can always trust where the Lord leads them, even if the path looks dangerous. Following Jesus is not always easy, but it is always fulfilling. Following Jesus may not always be safe, but He will protect them. Teach them to abandon their own despair for His hope.

Who are you following? Remember, one road leads to destruction but looks so inviting. Satan will disguise his path to appear smooth and easy. But boy oh boy, the second you are on the path, he starts setting traps. Then you are caught. Jesus invites you to walk along His blood-stained path. And when the path gets hard, He carries you.

Father, remind me why I follow you. I choose today to follow You wherever You lead.

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Advice, Bible, Child Raising, Child Rearing, Commands, Disciplemaking, Encouragement, Family, Mentoring, Modeling, Obedience, Parenting, Surrender, Widows, Women

A WOMAN’S PLACE

1 TIMOTHY 5:14

“Therefore, I want younger widows to get married, bear children, keep house, and give the enemy no occasion for reproach;” 

I just couldn’t resist titling today’s devotion as I did. Now that I have done that, let me quickly explain, lol. I do not mean a woman’s place is in the kitchen or that her value is only attributable to child bearing or being married. Goodness no! If I actually believed that I wouldn’t last very long in my family, lol. We have to concentrate on the last phrase.

A woman’s place, just like every believer, is to be above reproach, to not bring any shame on our Savior, to be surrendered to Him. This is NOT the same word that was used back 1 Timothy 3:2 or 5:7. This word is only used in one other verse, where it is used twice (1 Peter 3:9). It means a scathing insult or slander. Paul is saying that these younger widows should live so that no one could bring an insult against them.

APPLICATION

In the same way, our children need to be taught to live that way. If we have nothing to hide, our lives will be above reproach. We won’t worry about people finding out our little secrets which could bring insult on us and our Lord. So, how do we teach our children to live that way? Simple! You have to live like that before them.

We must live with no secrets, no lies, no hidden lifestyles. Our children need to be able to trust our character. One of the scariest things your child can say to you is, “I want to grow up and be just like you.” Right? That puts all the pressure on you, or does it? No! Jesus is the one who lives through you. If you surrender daily, your children can grow up to be just like Him.

So, how are your living? Are you free of reproach due to the protection of our Lord? You can be. Just surrender today. Let Jesus be Jesus in you. Then if people try to slander you, and they will, remember it is not you they are slandering. It’s Jesus.

Give me strength, Lord, to live a life that mirrors You. I want the world to see You and not me. Thank You for living in and through me.

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Bible, Child Raising, Child Rearing, Commands, Confession, Forgiveness, God's Will, Gossip, Inspirational, Lies, Love, Mentoring, Modeling, Obedience, Parenting

DID YOU HEAR ABOUT?

1 TIMOTHY 5:13

“At the same time they also learn to be idle, as they go around from house to house; and not merely idle, but also gossips and busybodies, talking about things not proper to mention.” 

Women get the bad reputation of being the gossipers, but have you have been to a barber shop? We men are just as bad, if not worse. Most of that gossip starts out as, “Did you hear about…” Or if the person telling the “news” is a believer, they may say, “Oh brother, we need to pray for…” Either way, it’s gossip.

That word in the Greek is only used right here. It has the idea of a pot that has boiled over, ruining whatever was in it and the area around it. That’s exactly what our gossip does. It ruins stuff, especially the reputation of the one gossiping and the one being gossiped about.

APPLICATION

This is a simple application. If you can’t catch this truth, maybe you need to go back to kindergarten. We teach our children that it is not nice to talk about people, and then we proceed to do it right in front of them. I know I have been guilty of that. Lord, please forgive me. As I said above, as believers we always disguise it as a prayer request, but it’s still gossip.

What would you do if your little Johnny was caught gossiping and spreading stuff about you? You would probably discipline him. So, what should the Lord do to you for doing the same thing? I am not saying He will, but you have definitely grieved His heart. Not living like Jesus grieves the Father’s heart. And we should never want to do that.

Are you a gossiper? Are you a “prayer request” giver? Make sure the news you are sharing about someone is true and appropriate. It may be completely true but is it worthy of sharing. Those little, juicy tidbits are so tempting, aren’t they? Don’t do it. Ask the Lord before you “share” that information. He will let you know if it is appropriate and worthy to be shared.

O Father in heaven, forgive me for gossip. Forgive me for talking about others. Forgive me for letting my desire to look better than someone else lead me to babble and boil over.

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Busyness, Child Rearing, Christ's Return, Commands, Completeness, Direction, Encouragement, Hope, Love, Mentoring, Modeling, Obedience, Parenting

SELF AFFLICTED

1 TIMOTHY 5:12

“thus incurring condemnation, because they have set aside their previous pledge.” 

Have you ever known people who complain about how awful their life is only to find out their troubles are the result of their own decisions? People lose their driving privileges from DUI’s – self-afflicted. Getting a speeding ticket – self-afflicted. I could go on and on, but you see where I am going with this. Now, every situation is unique. However, most of our troubles (me included) are the result of self.

In today’s verse, the younger widows receive judgment or condemnation for deserting their first love, not for wanting to get married again. They had pledged to serve Christ but abandoned that calling. Before you judge them, however, we are the same way. We all just want what we want when we want it, disregarding previous commitments.

APPLICATION

We have the responsibility as parents to teach our children to keep their commitments. Once they agree to be a part of a team sport, they should complete that season unless injury or team conduct merits leaving the team. Once your child begins a project, they need to complete it. Finality is important. Seeing the project through to completion teaches great lessons.

Today, too many of us get bored with something and just drop it. We have forgotten the discipline of completion. We have forgotten the discipline of commitment. Don’t let your children do that. Hold them accountable. In the future they will thank you.

Are you guilty of quitting when it gets hard? If you are, go back and pick that project or task back up again. Finish it. Set some goals and accomplish them. Set reasonable goals, some you know you can meet. Then next time you can raise the bar a little bit. But just don’t quit.

Master and Teacher, You never quit on us. So, I will not quit on You. I will accept and complete the tasks You give me.

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Affection, Bible, Busyness, Child Raising, Child Rearing, Direction, Disciplemaking, Encouragement, Family, God's Will, Love, Mentoring, Ministry, Modeling, Obedience, Parenting, Passion, Sanctification, Service, Widows

CHRIST FIRST

1 TIMOTHY 5:11

“But refuse to put younger widows on the list, for when they feel sensual desires in disregard of Christ, they want to get married,” 

I have to admit that I had to consult some commentators on this verse. At first glance in the English, this paints the younger widows in a bad way. Fortunately, the Greek meaning of the phrase “feel sensual desires in disregard of” was not originally meant to portray such a negative opinion. The Greek word for that phrase is only used here in the New Testament.

The purpose of “the list” of widows was for the church to minister to them and for the widows, in return, minister to each other and serve the Body. Paul is merely saying that younger widows will have the natural desires to remarry which will limit their ability to serve. He is not condemning these young widows. He is, in fact, releasing them from the obligation to serve.

APPLICATION

How in the world do you apply this verse to your children? Easy! Put Christ first! Putting Christ first is costly. Putting Christ first means letting other things go. Putting Christ first means not doing some things and pursuing other things. Now, tell me that doesn’t apply to your kids.

When we teach our children to pursue Christ first, they will have to make some tough choices. They will be given ample opportunities to pursue everything but Christ. They will have to choose which master to follow. If we invest the time to teach them the honor and privilege of putting Christ first, they will reap the benefits of that close, personal relationship that comes with that. Don’t you want that for your son or daughter?

Are you putting Christ first? Or are you pursuing the world, with all its distractions. You cannot put family or work or even ministry first and expect to have that intimate relationship with Christ. Whatever is causing you to put Christ anywhere but in first place in your life must be examined closely and put in its proper position in your life.

Lord Jesus, I want You to be first in my life. I want You to come before anything. I want You to be second to nothing.

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Affection, Bible, Caregiver, Child Raising, Child Rearing, Christianity, Commands, Disciplemaking, Encouragement, Faith, Family, Love, Mentoring, Mercy, Ministry, Modeling, Obedience, Qualifications, Service, Widows, Works

WORTHY OF HONOR

1 TIMOTHY 5:10

“having a reputation for good works; and if she has brought up children, if she has shown hospitality to strangers, if she has washed the saints’ feet, if she has assisted those in distress, and if she has devoted herself to every good work.” 

Just look at the list of this widow’s character traits making her worthy of honor by the church. She has a good reputation. She is a child raiser. She is hospitable, service oriented, full of mercy and devoted. Wow! That’s some woman!

But shouldn’t we all be like that? I mean, look at the list again. Which one of those traits don’t belong in your life? The bottom line is she puts others before herself. Therein lies the rub. We don’t want to do that. We want to see ourselves first. We want to meet our needs first. It’s always me, me, me!

APPLICATION

Well, this is a no brainer. As parents, we are constantly teaching our little Gertrudes and Elords how to not be selfish. We teach children to share because they are naturally selfish. We teach them to watch out for their little brother or sister because they are not concerned with that. 

But once again, this is better caught than taught. We must model these behaviors. When they see us showing mercy to someone, they learn from that. When they observe us serving someone else, they watch how it’s done. We are living out the traits they need to embrace. So, be very careful what you do and say. Little eyes and ears are watching and listening.

How are you in regard to these traits? Are you hospitable? Do you show mercy or wrath? We may not be a widow who needs to be put on the church list, but we still need to live out these same godly traits. And what is amazing is that when we do these things, we are the ones who are blessed. Be a blessing!

I do enjoy blessing others, Lord. Help me see their need even before it is apparent. Let me be Your hands and feet to them.

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Advice, Bible, Caregiver, Child Raising, Child Rearing, Comfort, Commands, Disciplemaking, Encouragement, Family, Love, Ministry, Modeling, Obedience, Parenting, Service, Widows

SIGN THEM UP

1 TIMOTHY 5:9

“A widow is to be put on the list only if she is not less than sixty years old, having been the wife of one man,” 

I’m a list maker. I didn’t used to be. After my bout with chemo several years ago I lost some of my short-term memory skills. So, now I have to make lists or poof – that thought vanishes. You are probably asking yourself, “Carl, what does your short-term memory loss have to do with today’s verse?” I’m glad you asked.

Widows and widowers are quickly forgotten. When their spouse dies, we all run to their home to console and love on them. However, after a few weeks, we forget about them. We get back into our routine and forget their routine has been forever altered. 

APPLICATION

Why don’t you get your family to “adopt” a widow or widower? Of course, you may have one in your own family to care for, but if you don’t, I am sure your church has a list of them who need someone to come alongside them. What a great way to teach your little Susie how to love others.

It’s the little things that are needed by them. Things a widow’s husband would have done around the house go undone. Even little things like changing that light bulb in the ceiling light are huge for them. For the widower, it might be missing those homecooked meals by his wife. Let your children help you as you minister to one of these on the list.

Who do you know right now who could use that kind of TLC? Give them a call and tell them you want to take them out to dinner this weekend. Drop by with your tool box and ask if they need anything done around the house. Ask them first. They will probably welcome the visit.

Father, forgive me when I overlook those who have such simple needs. I want You to use me to help them with these daily tasks. I know they are precious in Your sight.

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Advice, Affection, Bible, Child Raising, Child Rearing, Commands, Disciplemaking, Encouragement, Family, Fatherhood, God's Will, Love, Mentoring, Modeling, Motherhood, Obedience, Parenting, Women

RESPONSIBILITIES

1 TIMOTHY 5:8

“But if anyone does not provide for his own, and especially for those of his household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.”

In Book Two of the Every Man A Warrior disciplemaking study, Lonnie Berger says this, “After becoming a Christian, marriage is the most life changing event in your life. When you marry, you give up your life in order to live it for someone else. You work for the other person. You begin to think about permanence, buying a house, saving for the future and providing for your children. You come to a whole new level of maturity.”

The phrase “does not provide” in today’s verse would lead you to think Paul is merely talking about food and shelter. No! The word actually has more to do with what Lonnie said. It’s about respecting your family. It’s about thinking about them first. It’s about acting according to God’s will on behalf of your family. That’s showing responsibility.

APPLICATION

Fathers, teach your sons to be men. Now, I am not taking ANYTHING away from the strength and power of women. We men would be doomed without them. But God intended for men to care for their families. The father is expected to provide for his family. Our society has downgraded that responsibility to the point that some men ignore that.

A real man loves his family. A real man comes home at night to his wife and children. A real man thinks about his family BEFORE he makes his plans. A real man consults his wife BEFORE he makes a purchase that can affect the household budget. A real man follows God.

Do you get the picture? Today’s blog is more directed toward the men, but ladies, you too have a responsibility to put your family before yourself. For most of you that is not a problem. But if it is, stop and correct that. And teach your children the same.

O God, thank You for my family. Thank You for convicting me when I become selfish in my time and energy. I want to please You as I care for my family.

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Advice, Bible, Blameless, Child Raising, Child Rearing, Commands, Confession, Disciplemaking, Encouragement, Family, Forgiveness, Holy Spirit, Lies, Mentoring, Obedience, Parenting, Satan, Surrender

UNAPPREHENDABLE

1 TIMOTHY 5:7

“Prescribe these things as well, so that they may be above reproach.”

I’m not sure “unapprehendable” is a word, but it is now, lol. I use that to describe “above reproach” for a reason. The Greek word means someone is trying to accuse someone else of something of which there is no evidence of their guilt. It’s a baseless charge. Therefore, they cannot be apprehended.

This Greek word is only used in 1 Timothy (3:2, 5:7 and 6:14) by Paul. I wonder why. Why did the Holy Spirit tell Paul to use that word only in this letter to Timothy? It’s a great word and could have been applied to a lot of Paul’s letters. It doesn’t matter why – only that it is used here.

APPLICATION

Oh, what an important thing to teach your little Gertrude and Elrod. They need to live in such a way that they are above reproach and unapprehendable. They should live surrendered to Jesus so completely that no accusation hurled against them can stick. They are guiltless before man. 

If we live that way, we don’t have to keep watching over our shoulders hoping no one finds out about us. We have nothing to hide. Our lives are an open book, so to speak. The devil loves to dig up our dirt and throw it back on us. But if we live like Paul is saying here, there is no dirt to be used against us. 

Are you unapprehendable? Or are you constantly trying to keep stuff hidden from others? How tiring! We can literally wear ourselves out hiding stuff. One lie leads to another lie. Don’t you get tired of that? Praise be to God! He sets us free from that. He knows our dirt and still forgives us. Won’t you live in that freedom today? Allow Him to walk with you wherever you go. He will NEVER lead you to a place that you are ashamed. 

Blameless! That’s the way I want live, Lord. Lead me in Your ways every day, so that I have nothing to hide.

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Advice, Alone, Bible, Child Raising, Child Rearing, Commands, Death, Encouragement, Modeling, Money, Parenting

DEAD WOMAN WALKING

1 TIMOTHY 5:6

“But she who gives herself to wanton pleasure is dead even while she lives.”

Have you heard the expression “Dead Man Walking”? It implies someone who is alive but living and acting as if he is dead. He has a careless disregard for life. Death is just all over him and is ready to snatch him away. Well, today’s verse says the same thing about this widow, the one who chooses “wanton pleasure.”

Now, what is wanton pleasure and how do we help the widows we know not live like that? “Wanton pleasure” means to live extravagantly or luxuriously. It’s the widow who has no regard for the cost of things. She spends money like it grows on trees. Paul is not saying it’s bad to have money. He is saying it is sin to live with that mindset. 

APPLICATION

Teach your children the value of money now. If you begin early, they will understand when you say, “Honey, we just can’t afford that right now.” Some parents don’t want to ever tell their little Johnny or Susie no, so they give them anything they want. That will lead them to live like the widow in today’s verse.

Instead, help them earn some money through extra chores or small jobs around your house. When they are old enough help them get a job in the neighborhood mowing grass or babysitting. As they get older, they will be ready for that first part-time job in the community. However you do it, teach them that money is simply a tool God has given us to live. It’s not what we live for.

How do you see wealth? Did you know that money is mentioned over 2,000 times in the Scriptures? It must be important for the Lord to spend so much time talking about it. He wants us to understand why He blesses us with the resources to live. Take some time and do a word study on money. You may just learn something. I know I did.

I know all I have belongs to You. Thank You, Lord, for blessing me with the means to care for my family. Help me be more generous with the resources You have given me.

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