Category Archives: Child Rearing

Advice, Bible, Child Raising, Child Rearing, Confession, Disciplemaking, Fighting, Godliness, Obedience, Opponents, Parenting

DON’T GO THERE

TITUS 3:9

“But avoid foolish controversies and genealogies and strife and disputes about the Law, for they are unprofitable and worthless.”

I know you’ve played tag, right. Every child has played some kind of tag game. Well, this is one tag game you don’t want to play. Paul tells us to “avoid” these things. Controversies, genealogies (really, he is talking about arguing about your pedigree), strife and disputes are all things we need to avoid. He just told us in verse 8 to be careful. You can’t be involved with these things and be careful.

Some people just like to fuss and argue. They are always looking for a fight. If we are to walk with Christ and be an effective witness, we can’t spend our time with those sorts of people. That may mean letting some relationships go. What? Yep! Some people are determined to bring you down. You should continue to pray for them, but don’t spend your time arguing and fussing with them. It will never end.

APPLICATION

This is an especially important lesson to teach our kids. They will be bombarded with people all their lives who want to drag them into endless arguments. The sooner they learn to avoid these “foolish controversies” the better. The hard part is when that person is a friend. But true friends don’t fuss and argue with us all the time, right?

That’s why your children need to have friends who share the same worldview. When you share God’s view of this world, there is normally fewer opportunities to disagree. I am not saying that will never happen, but there will less times. Why? Because you both see through God’s eyes. You both are surrendered to His will. You both are seeking to please Him. The petty things just don’t matter.

Are you an arguer? Do you seek out fights and quarrels? I know a lot of Baptist who are, lol. We need to spend our time concentrating on serving our Master instead of trying to make ourselves master. We have a God who is worth serving. Why don’t you and I both try to more diligent today in doing just that?

I confess I want my way too much. Forgive me for being argumentative and quarrelsome. I want to please You, Lord.

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BE CAREFUL

TITUS 3:8

“This is a trustworthy statement; and concerning these things I want you to speak confidently, so that those who have believed God will be careful to engage in good deeds. These things are good and profitable for men.”

How careful are you? Paul tells believers in this verse to be careful to engage in good deeds, but what exactly does he mean? Let’s look at that word “careful.” It means to continuously connect your insight or your inner perspective to your outward behavior. In other words, to do what you know you should do. In this case, that is engaging in or setting the example in good deeds.

And we are careful to do that, not to gain favor with God, but because they “are good and profitable for men.” We don’t do good deeds to get brownie points. We do good deeds because it is the right thing to do and because we love the Lord. Our deeds should always be motivated by love, not by our desire to get something back.

APPLICATION

Are your children good deed doers? Some kids are just built that way. They love to help others. Encourage that. Find ways to help them fulfill that desire. There are plenty of opportunities around you. Perhaps you have an elderly neighbor who needs their lawn mowed or raked. Maybe your child can help cut out crafts for Sunday School. Help them to be “careful.”

But you also may have a child who isn’t bent that way. They tend to be more self-centered. Well, now is the time to teach them. But don’t make it burdensome or they will resent it. Find something that will interest them. I am sure they have some kind of interest which can be redirected towards someone else’s need. Perhaps someone on their ball team doesn’t have all the equipment they need because they can’t afford it. Have them share. There is always way to help them be “careful.”

And how about you? Are you putting into practice your inner perspective? Are you being careful to do good deeds? You can set the example for your children. Let your actions be profitable for men, especially your children. As they see you and perhaps help you to do good deeds, you are teaching them to be obedient to the Lord. That pleases Him. It’s a win-win-win.

I will be careful today to do good deeds. I will put my inner desires into action. Above all, Lord, I want to please You.

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MY INHERITANCE

TITUS 3:7

“so that being justified by His grace we would be made heirs according to the hope of eternal life.”

I saw a movie recently in which all the family were clamoring over the inheritance left by their father and grandfather. When it all went to someone else, they were furious. They had been planning how to spend all that money and now there was nothing for them. Aren’t you glad that God doesn’t leave us out of His inheritance? He promised it, so we will receive it.

But just exactly what will we receive? We will receive eternal life. We will receive entrance into heaven. We will receive all the riches of heaven. We will receive crowns and rewards according to our faithfulness here. You see, the difference between our inheritance here on earth and our inheritance in heaven is that WE have to die to inherit our heavenly reward. And for the believer, there is no greater inheritance.

APPLICATION

Do your children know they will inherit your stuff? I am assuming that’s how your will is written. What? No will? Well, you need to get that written, if you haven’t. If you have that will, and your children are named as the recipients, at some point you need to go over it with them. They need to know who is getting what. Too many families end up fighting and fussing over mom’s and dad’s inheritance when they are gone.

But more importantly, you need to talk about their heavenly inheritance. When you bring out your will, talk about how the Lord has already established their inheritance for all His children. Unlike your will, which you could change, He will never remove you from what He has promised you in Christ. There is nothing you can do to be removed. It was His grace that justified you.

Are you waiting on some earthly inheritance? Are you making plans on how to spend that money? Don’t be so sure. Earthly treasures are fleeting. You can rest in your heavenly inheritance. It is a sure thing. God has promised it, and He never breaks a promise. Live today as God sees you. You are a child of the king. You are royalty. You are rich beyond description.

I know I am Your child, and along with every other believer I am an heir. Thank You for taking me into Your family. Thank You for making me Your child.

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Bible, Child Raising, Child Rearing, Christianity, Creation, Disciplemaking, Encouragement, Faith, Forgiveness, Holy Spirit, Inspirational, Mercy, Obedience, Parenting, Redemption, Salvation, Surrender, Testimony

BORN AGAIN

TITUS 3:5

“He saved us, not on the basis of deeds which we have done in righteousness, but according to His mercy, by the washing of regeneration and renewing by the Holy Spirit,”

You’ve heard this expression, I’m sure. You are born again at salvation. Well, in today’s verse we have that expression defined in the word “regeneration.” The Greek word literally means birthed again. It’s only used twice in the New Testament. It’s used here and also in Matthew 19:28 where it refers to the rebirth of physical creation when Christ returns to begin His millennial reign.

But not only are you reborn, you are also renewed. This word means to have a whole new development, a renewal which is through God’s power. You see, this is all done by God. You didn’t rebirth yourself nor renew yourself. God saved you. That’s a fact. And if He does something, you can take it to the bank. It’s done. It’s complete. It’s forever.

APPLICATION

Explaining this to your children can be challenging, depending on their age. Do you have any videos of their birth? Drag them out. Show them the video and celebrate their birth. Then ask them this question. “Did you do anything to help in your birth?” Of course, the correct answer is “no.” All they did was surrender to the process. They were depending on mom pushing them out and the doctor delivering them.

The same is true for their spiritual birth. For that to happen they have to surrender to the One who is drawing them out of darkness. When they do, He delivers them into the light of His love. They are totally dependent upon the Lord to bring them into this new life.

Let me ask you this. If you are born again, are you living like it? Are you walking in your renewal? So many of us come to Christ and then try to keep one foot back in the old life. Regeneration and renewal imply a fresh start, a clean slate. The old has passed away. There is no room in the regenerated, renewed life for the old ways. Accept the change. Embrace your new life.

Lord, I will walk in newness today. I will lay aside all the past ways and embrace all You have for me in my new life. Thank You for my rebirth in Christ.

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Bible, Child Raising, Child Rearing, Disciplemaking, Evangelism, Family, Following, Holy Spirit, Inspirational, Kindness, Mentoring, Modeling, Parenting, Surrender, Witnessing

A KIND GOD

TITUS 3:4

“But when the kindness of God our Savior and His love for mankind appeared,”

Have you ever thought much about kindness? Are you kind? Do you show kindness to others? The Greek word used here is the same one used as one of the fruits of the Spirit. One commentator says, “We have no term that quite carries this notion of kind and good.” The word refers to meeting real needs, in God’s way, in His timing.

God showed His kindness by sending Jesus to us. Now, we can never top that, but we can show His kindness to others. The best way, of course, is by sharing this wonderful gift of salvation with others. That is the ultimate kindness. But we can also show kindness to others by asking the Lord what He would have us do for others. Showing kindness is outside of most of us. We are selfish beings. But the Spirit of God can produce that kindness if we will surrender to Him.

APPLICATION

How do you teach your children to be kind? By being kind yourself. Look around your church or neighborhood for someone to whom you as a family can show kindness. Get your children involved in planning out what you can do to show kindness to that person or family. Make sure your children understand that you are doing this to show them Jesus’ kindness. And, of course, make sure when you carry out this act of kindness that you share the Gospel.

How about helping your children prepare some Ziploc bags of items to hand out to people on the street corners? My city has people all over town who stand on those corners with signs asking for help. Prepare some bags with items they can use like a toothbrush, toothpaste, hand sanitizer, soap, snack food, etc. And don’t forget a good Gospel tract. Pray over each bag, and let your children hand them out.

Kindness is not hard if we let the Spirit lead. But kindness is impossible if we allow our flesh to get in the way. Will you allow the Lord to use you? There is probably no better compliment than to be known as a kind person. Be kind! Do it because of the kindness He has shown to you.

I will be kind today to those around me, beginning with my family. Sometimes they are the hardest to be kind to. Forgive me, Father, for not showing Your kindness to others.

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BOY, WE WERE A MESS

TITUS 3:3

“For we also once were foolish ourselves, disobedient, deceived, enslaved to various lusts and pleasures, spending our life in malice and envy, hateful, hating one another.”

Does this describe you before Christ? It does me. I hate to admit that, but I was all those things. Paul nails it. Do you know why? Because he was the same way. Do you remember Paul (Saul then) before the Damascus road? I am sure Paul was reflecting on his own life before Christ as he wrote these words to Titus.

What a change Jesus makes. We stop being so foolish because we trust His wisdom. We begin to obey out of love for our new Master. We exchange the slave chains of lusts and pleasure for being a bond-slave to Jesus. We lay down malice and envy for love and mercy for others. We love rather than hate. With Christ in our life, our past is laid to rest.

APPLICATION

Take this verse and make a list of these “not so nice” qualities. Get your children to give you examples when they or someone they know have acted this way. Ask them why they think the Lord doesn’t want that for us. You may be surprised. They may name you. Now, don’t be offended. It should give you a wake-up call that they are watching all the time.

It is important for your children to know that at salvation Jesus gives them all the power they need to overcome these old, nasty actions. But they have to submit to Him daily, really every second. They may be young, but their flesh is strong. Help them learn how to overcome the desires of the flesh by bathing them in the Word and guiding them into Spirit-filled living.

How are you doing with your flesh today? Left on our own we are doomed. We cannot defeat it. But we don’t have to. The Spirit of the living God dwells within every believer empowering us to conquer the flesh. It is He who loves rather than hates. It is He who chooses to obey rather than disobey. Let Him have all of you today.

Lord, I yield my spirit to Your Spirit right now. I desire to walk in obedience. I will not succumb to the desire of my flesh this day.

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NICE GUY

TITUS 3:2

to malign no one, to be peaceable, gentle, showing every consideration for all men.”

Are you a nice person? I mean, do you portray these traits Paul lists in today’s verse? These are admirable traits, but I guarantee you they are not possible for long without Christ being the center of your life. Christ showed us all of these while He was here on earth. If He can live them out, we can too. We just have to allow Him to live them through us.

“To malign” means to speak evil against someone. That’s not our calling. “To be peaceable” literally means not to fight. For some of us that’s hard. “Gentle” means to be forbearing or reasonable toward others. That can be tested at times, can’t it? And “showing every consideration” has the idea that you can show restraint.

APPLICATION

Aren’t those four traits worth instilling in your children? How many times have you had to stop your children from doing the exact opposite? Instead of not speaking evil, they are constantly tattling or trying to get their sister or brother in trouble. Flesh does not have to be taught how to be fleshly. It comes natural. Our job as Christian parents is to consistently hold that flesh accountable. We must take every opportunity to point them towards the attributes of Christ.

Will your children embrace these traits? Only if they first know Christ. Trying to “force” these behaviors on your child before they know Him may get them to follow a rule, but it won’t change their heart. Only Jesus can do that. So, is it hopeless? Of course not! But know that the heart change is not your responsibility. Your job is to keep pointing them to Jesus. Jesus is big enough to handle the rest.

Which of these four traits gives you the most trouble? Probably, for me, it’s being gentle. I often have unreasonable expectations of others and am not very forbearing. I expect too much or I want them to comply to my wishes. That’s not being Jesus. The only way I can live this out is to surrender my desires to His. I have to see the other person through His eyes. Then I can show the gentleness of Christ.

I desire to live out these traits towards others, Lord. I know that I may be the only Jesus they ever see. Help me be that to them today.

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OBEDIENCE

TITUS 3:1

“Remind them to be subject to rulers, to authorities, to be obedient, to be ready for every good deed,”

This is the third time in the letter to Titus Paul has told us to be subject to someone. He tells wives to be subject to their husbands (2:5). He tells slaves to be subject to the masters (2:9). And now he tells us to be subject to those who are in authority, the rulers in our lives. Now, who are they? Anyone who has legal authority over you (police, judges, elected officials, etc). If we all did that, there would be so much less anarchy in our society.

And the word “obedient” has an interesting meaning. It’s not just the act of obeying. It’s being persuaded that what you are asked to do should be done first. It’s like when your boss, whom you don’t really care for, gives you a task to do. You do it right then, not because you want to, but because he is the boss and he wants it done. You obey those rulers and authorities unless you are asked to do something immoral or illegal.

APPLICATION

This is another one of those no-brainers. We teach our children how to obey. They must place themselves up under your leadership in the home in preparation for doing the same at school or on a job one day. When they understand that all authorities in their lives have been placed there by the Lord, they will submit much easier (or at least we hope they will).

Once again, they watch how you do this. If they see you constantly trying to get out from under your authorities, they will learn to do the same. When is the last time you prayed for the rulers and authorities in your life? Get your children to pray with you for your elected officials and law enforcement. Then the next time you have an encounter with one of them, your attitude may be just a little different. Praying for someone will do that.

So many Christians don’t get this. They try to hold on to “their rights” to the point that they become almost rebellious in their spirits. We have no rights. They were all nailed to the cross. Our response to those in authority should be “yes” whenever possible. Ask the Lord to give you a submissive spirit. Ask Him to show you how to pray for those rulers. Perhaps the Lord is preparing you to lead.

I am thankful for those You have placed in authority in my life. I know You establish kings and kingdoms. Show me today how I can best serve.

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DON’T BE IGNORED

TITUS 2:15

“These things speak and exhort and reprove with all authority. Let no one disregard you.”

We have a difficult word in today’s verse. The Greek word translated “disregard” is only used in this verse. It has more to do with us than others. Paul is telling Titus to be forceful, to stand up for himself. Now, that had nothing to do with who Titus was. It was about Who he represented and what he was saying. He said to “speak and exhort and reprove with all authority.”

People are going to despise us. People are going to try to ignore us or push us aside. There are times when we must stand up and be heard. I don’t mean in an ugly way. But we must speak truth and be heard. We, in fact, have an obligation to do that. When we have been entrusted with the only truth, and we hear it being twisted to lead others astray, we have to speak. Is that comfortable? Not to most of us, but it must be done.

APPLICATION

Teaching our children to stand up for themselves and the Lord is a worthy goal. We don’t want our children to be pushovers. But we also don’t want them to be arrogant and snobby. There’s a fine line which is successfully walked only when Christ reigns in their life. It is important that we live this out for them in the way we deal with others in their presence. We can all be Jesus to others wherever we are. It just requires us to submit and let Jesus do the talking.

Have you ever had your faith “attacked” by someone in front of your children? How did you respond? This is not a time to get into a theological debate. This is the time to simply speak the truth, but speak you must. To not reply can send the message to your child that it is not worth responding. They need to know that you will defend the Gospel and that you believe what it says. Our actions speak volumes.

Are you able to speak out? Are you willing to stand for truth? Will you “speak and exhort and reprove with all authority.” Paul’s command to Titus applies to us today, therefore, the last part of the verse does as well. “Let no one disregard you.” You represent the King of kings and Lord of lords. You have His authority. Act like it.

Father, I carry Your seal stamped on my heart. You have given me Your authority to yield. Help me stand for truth!

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WE’RE HIS

TITUS 2:14

“who gave Himself for us to redeem us from every lawless deed, and to purify for Himself a people for His own possession, zealous for good deeds.”

As believers, we know we belong to the Lord. You are told that from the moment of salvation. But you need to take a look at today’s verse to truly understand what that means. Paul breaks it down so perfectly and completely. First, we are His because He paid the price for us. He gave Himself to redeem us. Why was that necessary? Because of our lawless deeds. He wiped them away by the shedding of His blood. That was the purchase price.

Then He purifies us because He will not and cannot allow sinful creatures to abide in His presence. He personally selects each of us. He knows us all by name. We are specially chosen. We belong in His collection. Isn’t that precious? Just like a collector who loves to take out his collection of stamps and admire them, Jesus loves to marvel at His collection of saints. We are each special to Him.

APPLICATION

Do your children collect anything? Maybe “collect” is the wrong word. My son used to have a huge collection of Matchbox and Hot Wheel cars. He loved to play with those. He would get them out and line them up on the floor and play for hours. Each one had their special job in his imagination. But he loved them all.

We want our children to know just how special they are to Jesus. He has a special plan for their life, but it is part of the big plan. Their life is part of His master plan for His kingdom. He wants to use each of us to fulfill it. Can He fulfill it without us? Of course. But His perfect plan involves every believer doing their part. Point your children towards that – the bigger picture. You never know how He may choose to use them.

Are you being used by Jesus? What would He have you do today? Many of us are too busy to allow Him to redirect us. We have our days and weeks mapped out. Any “interference” from Him just gets in the way. Stop that now. Allow Him to take your calendar to the shredder if necessary. Yield to His plan today and enjoy the journey.

My day is Yours, Lord. Put me where You want me and use me however You see fit. I’m Yours.

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