Category Archives: Child Raising

Advice, Affection, Child Raising, Child Rearing, Comfort, Contentment, Disciplemaking, Encouragement, Forgiveness, Mentoring, Obedience, Parenting

IT’S OKAY

2 TIMOTHY 4:16

“At my first defense no one supported me, but all deserted me; may it not be counted against them.”

I bet Paul had names on the tip of his tongue when he wrote this verse. People who knew him and his ministry got scared and wouldn’t back him up. They had fled the scene, kind of like John Mark in the garden when they grabbed his clothing. He peeled it off and ran. 

Even in the midst of that hurt, Paul says, “It’s okay. Don’t get upset they didn’t help.” Paul is so concerned about Timothy as he writes this last letter. He wants to make sure Timothy doesn’t hold any ill will towards anyone after he is gone. I believe Paul knew it was only going to get harder for Timothy and that he was going to need all the Christian brothers and sisters he could find to surround him.

APPLICATION

Our children will get their feelings hurt by friends. I guarantee it. The day will come when they come home from school or a game in tears or screaming mad because “such and such” just ignored them or dumped them for someone else. Quickly, take them to this verse. Remind them of the context of the verse (Paul’s last imprisonment, hole in the ground, going to die). Now, don’t make light of their situation. Feelings are real. Instead, point out Paul’s attitude.

They have a choice to make. They can either harbor resentment or forgive. Remember, forgiveness is always for the one forgiving, not the one forgiven. If you refuse to forgive someone, they may never know. But you will never forget it. Tell your child how sweet forgiveness is once you truly embrace it.

Is there someone in your life right now you need to forgive for a wrong against you? How long have you been holding on to this? Do they even know you have not forgiven them? Stop and forgive them now. As soon as you can call them or go see them. Make this right. It’s not about them. It’s about you walking in faith and believing in God’s powerful forgiveness. 

I can’t forgive one single person without knowing You are the one who extends the forgiveness. Thank You, Lord, for forgivng me when I was unforgiveable. I do deserve Your grace.

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Advice, Bible, Child Raising, Child Rearing, Disciplemaking, Encouragement, Evangelism, Modeling, Parenting, Witnessing

KEEP MY EYE ON YOU

2 TIMOTHY 4:15

“Be on guard against him yourself, for he vigorously opposed our teaching.”

Paul is continuing his warning to Timothy in today’s verse about Alexander the coppersmith. He is basically saying, “Keep your eye on him.” He doesn’t say retaliate. He doesn’t say to speak against him. He says, “Be on guard…” There are some people we need to watch closely.

But why? “for he vigorously opposed our teaching.”  It wasn’t because he didn’t like Paul. It wasn’t because he made idols. It was because he was an open opponent of the gospel. Those are the ones we need to keep an eye on. And remember, they are salvageable also. Christ can do a work in their life. If you don’t believe me, read Lee Strobel’s “The Case for Christ.”

APPLICATION

Teaching our kids not to get back at someone who doesn’t like them can be difficult. We are naturally inclined to do that. But we can teach them to be watchful. What is the first thing you tell your son or daughter when you are teaching them to hit a baseball or softball? Keep your eye on the ball! Why? To make contact. To hit it where they want to hit it.

Let’s apply this to today’s verse. If they can keep their eye on people who they know oppose Jesus, they may just see an opening to “hit” them where they can find Jesus. They also protect themselves from being “hit” by that person in their opposition. Go outside and pitch them a few balls. They’ll get it clearly when you bang them with the ball. Just kidding!

Whom are you keeping your eye on? Are you even concerned enough about the Gospel that those who oppose it are recognized by you? They are really pretty easy to spot.

Their whole worldview is different. You may need to examine your walk with Christ if you cannot point out those around you who have Alexander’s attitude.

Lord, help me to guard against those who would want to harm the Gospel message. And keep my eye on them for opportunities to present it to them in a loving, inviting way. Better yet, help me be Jesus to them.

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Advice, Affection, Child Raising, Child Rearing, Commands, Evil, Fighting, Gossip, Lies, Ministry, Modeling, Obedience, Parenting, Persecution, Perseverance, Revenge, Scripture, Service, Suffering, Trust, Witnessing

THE LORD WILL REPAY

2 TIMOTHY 4:14

“Alexander the coppersmith did me much harm; the Lord will repay him according to his deeds.”

It’s pretty obvious that Alexander didn’t care for Paul. We aren’t exactly sure who he was, but there are a few speculations. He may have been one of the metal workers thrust forth by the Jews to denounce Paul in Ephesus. Demetrius had begun this protest, but a man named Alexander was trying speak about how Paul’s mission work was hurting the sale of idols of the great temple of Artemis, which was their livelihood.

This name appears later in Acts at Paul’s trial. This time he is there publicly to speak against Paul. Animosity, hatred, pure evil. Paul knew it, but what did he tell Timothy? Turn the other cheek. Do not engage this man. God will handle him. As powerful and as loud as Alexander may appear, God is bigger and louder (if necessary).

APPLICATION

Do you think your children are going to face an Alexander? You had better believe it. If your children are attempting to live for Jesus, there will be people who will feel threatened. You may not know why they feel threatened, but they will. It may go to their own insecurities. It could be from their wrecked childhood. But for some reason, they have it out for your son or daughter. So, what do you tell them to do? The exact same thing Paul told Timothy – let God have it.

Do you now what all “Alexanders” need? Jesus! They need His forgiveness. They need His love. They need His mercy. And all of that comes through us. God still uses His people to deliver the gospel. Teach your children to be that deliverer of hope to “Alexanders.” And when they rise up in hatred, love them more.

Who do you need to approach in love today whom has set out to tear you down? We all have someone who just doesn’t like us. We may not know why, but God does. Ask Him. You may share a past with that person that could bring them to Christ. But whatever you do, don’t retaliate. That’s the Lord’s job, and He can handle it much better than you.

Father, I lay down my plans to get even right now. It is hard not to want to get back at those who have harmed me. But at Your command, I will obey.

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MY STUFF

2 TIMOTHY 4:13

“When you come bring the cloak which I left at Troas with Carpus, and the books, especially the parchments.”

Paul was in prison, his last imprisonment, and like a lot of prisoners, was asking a friend to bring him a few things. From what I have read about his conditions, they weren’t too nice. He was basically in a hole in the ground, guarded around the clock. It was a damp, cold, uncomfortable cell. So, he wanted that cloak to stay warm.

But why the books and parchments? He wasn’t through writing and reading God’s Word. We don’t know what the books were, but I bet they were Greek fables. Paul didn’t have time to waste on mindless thoughts. His focus, even there, was presenting the Gospel. And the parchments? I suppose they were for more writing. Aren’t you glad Paul wrote his thirteen letters of the New Testament for us to read today?

APPLICATION

You are probably thinking, “How will you apply this verse, Carl?” Well, think about it. How much time and energy are you wasting right now? Paul didn’t spurn one moment. He was laser focused even in his last days to present the Gospel. Are you and your children doing the same? We may not be in a prison cell, but we are in the last days. Yep, I believe that. I believe every day could be our last, so bring me my cloak and books and parchments.

Explain to your children that we have a responsibility to take every opportunity we have to share the Word of God with the lost. Do they have lost friends? Make sure your children know how to share with them. Do they have a teacher who needs to hear about the Lord? Perhaps you can go with them to share. That would be cool – tag teaming with your child.

Just don’t waste these moments. Take full advantage of every day the Lord allows you to be here on planet earth. He has placed you here and brought you to salvation for one purpose. He wants to use you to spread His message of salvation to a lost and dying world. Will you do that? What do you need? A cloak? Some books? Some parchments? Ask and it will given.

O Lord My God, I know You will give me exactly what I need to accomplish Your mission. Give me the gumption and desire to fulfill all You have for me. I want to see many come to You.

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Affection, Bible, Child Raising, Child Rearing, Encouragement, Friends, Mentoring, Ministry, Modeling, Parenting, Testimony

WHATEVER YOU NEED

2 TIMOTHY 4:12

“But Tychicus I have sent to Ephesus.”

Have you ever had a friend who said, “Whatever you need”? And they mean it. You could call on them for anything, and they would be there. Tychicus was that type of friend. He is mentioned by name five times in the New Testament, once in Acts 20:4 and four other times in Paul’s letters (Ephesians 6:21; Colossians 2:7; today’s verse and Titus 3:12).

He was a faithful and beloved friend of Paul who is believed to have delivered the letters of Ephesians, Colossians and Philemon. He may have delivered 2 Corinthians. He was sent by Paul to Crete and Ephesians. Why am I telling you all this about Tychicus? Because we need faithful friends, and we need to be that type of faithful friend.

APPLICATION

Our children are going to have so many friends in their lifetime, but only a few like Tychicus. And the best way for them to have those kinds of friends is to be that type of friend. To be that kind of friend you have to have a motivation beyond your friendship. Tychicus wasn’t serving Paul. He was serving Jesus. So, how can your children serve Jesus by serving their friends? That makes them a Tychicus, not just doing nice things for them.

Of course, they will also learn to be like Tychicus by watching how you and your friends interact. As they observe your selfless love for others, they will begin to understand what that means. When you give up your time and resources to meet your friends’ needs, they will ask you questions. These are the times you can explain selfless love and commitment. What great teaching moments.

How are you doing with being a Tychicus today? Have you thanked your friends who are being Tychicus to you? I know I have several people in my life who I need to thank more for that. You may not think of Tychicus as being a major player in the New Testament, but Paul obviously trusted and loved him. One day we will meet him in eternity and get to hear the rest of the story. Will you serve the Lord that selflessly today?

Lord, it is not important that I am known for what I do for You or others. Help me to serve just to please You. Let me be a faithful friend to those who need me.

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Advice, Affection, Child Raising, Child Rearing, Disciplemaking, Encouragement, Forgiveness, Love, Mentoring, Ministry, Modeling, Obedience, Patience

RESTORING OLD FRIENDS

2 TIMOTHY 4:11

“Only Luke is with me. Pick up Mark and bring him with you, for he is useful to me for service.”

I have to tell you that this verse warms my heart. Mark had joined Paul, Barnabus and Silas, but split at Perga in Pamphylia (Acts 13:13). So when Barnabus wanted to bring his cousin Mark back on the next journey (Acts 15:38) it lead to a split between Barnabus and Paul, causing each to go their separate way – Paul with Silas an Barnabus with Mark.

But skip ahead to today’s verse, almost 20 years later, and who does he ask Timothy to bring with him – Mark. Why? Undoubtedly Mark had redeemed himself through his missionary work. Sometime between 50-60 AD Mark wrote his gospel. Paul had heard of his growth and work and now he wanted to see him in his last days. We can learn some lessons from this verse.

APPLICATION

These are applications for us all, not just parents and not just children. And they are not original. Credit belongs with the author, Kevin Laymon – http://glorybooks.org/paul-barnabas-split-progression-john-mark/.

He gives us four lessons we can learn:

  1. Our past mistakes don’t have to define our future. God constantly works within us to make us more like Him. No matter the extent of our failure, we should learn from it, and allow God to continue to work out his sanctification process in us. It’s never too late.
  2. If you mess up in ministry, or in life, don’t ever feel like you can’t get back in the game. Mark was a late bloomer, as are some of us. Sometimes God works in people for years, with many falls along the way, before they are ready for ministry. Be patient.
  3. It’s never too late to reconnect with someone you’ve let down. We’ve all failed someone in our past. Time spent being sanctified can be a powerful healer.
  4. It’s never too late to forgive someone who let you down. Just as we’ve all failed someone else, we’ve also had someone fail us. Sometimes people go years without speaking because of a falling out. Someone hurts us and we assume they’ll always be that type of person–unchanging. But we need to always remember that if we can change over time, so can someone else. Reach out to them. They just might surprise you.

Lord, let this forgiving, redeeming spirit reign through me. There are many to whom I need to extend grace now after years of separation.

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Advice, Affection, Child Raising, Child Rearing, Cowardice, Encouragement, Faith, Faithfulness, Friends, Obedience, Parenting

WHEN FRIENDS DESERT

2 TIMOTHY 4:10

“for Demas, having loved this present world, has deserted me and gone to Thessalonica; Crescens has gone to Galatia, Titus to Dalmatia.”

Just who was Demas? Well, Paul mentions him in the letter to the Colossians and also in his letter to Philemon. In both of these references it appears he is serving and loving the Lord. But…then we come to today’s passage. Some time has passed. Something has happened.

Paul says he has “loved this present world.” We don’t know what that means. Whatever lured him was responsible for leading him away from his faith. He abandoned Paul while he was in prison. That word “deserted” literally means to leave in a lurch, to walk away from. How sad and hurtful for Paul.

APPLICATION

Your children are going to have friends desert them. They will have friends who pretend to be friends and all of a sudden turn turn their backs on them for someone else. That is going to hurt, and there is no way to protect them from this. However, read them this verse. This has been going on for a long time. Even in this verse, Paul did not speak evil of Demas. He simply stated what he had done. Paul obviously still loved Demas.

It’s more important that we teach our children not to be a Demas. We do not want them to abandon their friends. That’s hurtful. And we sure don’t want them to walk away from their faith. That would be catastrophic. Ask your kids what they think drew Demas away. Ask them if there is anything that could draw them away. Then pray for their commitment to friends and faith.

Are you a faithful friend? Are you committed to Christ whatever may come? Don’t be like Demas who ducked and ran when things got tough. He probably knew Paul was about to die and decided he was better off back in the world. That is never true. Stay committed. The Lord will see you through any challenge you face, no matter how daunting.

O Lord, I can’t do this without You. Remind me daily of Your sustaining power. I want to represent You well.

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Advice, Bible, Child Raising, Child Rearing, Disciplemaking, Encouragement, Family, Mentoring, Parenting

Y’ALL COME

2 TIMOTHY 4:9


“Make every effort to come to me soon;”

There are some people you just want to spend time with, am I right? Maybe it’s because you’ve been friends a long time. Perhaps it’s because they are just fun to be around. Whatever the reason, you long to see them. Paul and Timothy had spent years together. Paul had mentored him and prepared him to serve. Now that Paul knows his days are limited, he wants to see Timothy.

Who do you have that kind of relationship with right now? With whom have you invested the amount of time necessary to develop that longing? You need to be pouring yourself into someone else. You need to be mentoring them to carry on the faith long after you’re gone. That takes time and energy, I know. But it’s time well spent.

APPLICATION

Of course, there is no one more important to develop than your own children. Let me get real personal today. Dads, how much time do you spend a day with your son? How about your daughter? We get so busy providing for our families or engaged in our hobbies (we’ve got to have our time) that we neglect the responsibility of time with our kids. Moms normally get their time. It’s the dads who fall way short.

How much time is enough? Well, that depends on your children. Some need more time than others. The Lord has blessed you with little people who need you. Why else would the Lord have placed them in your life? They are not burdens. They are opportunities to be Jesus to the next generation. You are doing God’s work each time you are with your children. Thank God for allowing you that privilege.

So, how are you doing with that? This week measure the amount of time you spend at work, play or with your children. You may need to adjust your schedule. Paul called Timothy his child in the faith. He poured into him. Will you do that today with your children? Whether they are biological, adopted, foster or step-children, choose today to invest in those the Lord has given you to raise. You will be saying to them, “Y’all come quickly. I need to see you.”

Father, thank You for allowing me to parent. Give me the discipline to make time for those You have placed in my life. Help me mentor them to be more like Jesus each day.

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CROWN ME

2 TIMOTHY 4:8

“in the future there is laid up for me the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous Judge, will award to me on that day; and not only to me, but also to all who have loved His appearing.”

Do you like to play checkers? That was the first thing I thought of when I read this verse. I know, call me weird, lol, But in checkers when you reach the opponents back row with one of your checkers, they have to crown you with another checker they have taken from you, giving that checker special power from that time forward in the game.

As believers, we don’t have to wait on the righteousness to come with the crown. If we are walking and talking like Jesus, we are living righteously. The crown is simply a recognition of who we are in Him. The crown belongs to Him because we have no ability for righteousness outside of Him. It is His righteousness that makes us righteous.

APPLICATION

So, how do we explain righteousness to our children? How do we get them to understand how to live that way? Let’s tell them what the word means. It simply means doing what is approved of by God, by His judicial approval, what is right in His eyes. Now, that weeds out a lot of nonsense, doesn’t it?

I explain it this way. It’s being right (salvation), knowing right (studying His Word) and doing right (walking daily according to His Word). If our children can do that, they are living righteously. If they understand that, they will receive that crown which they will turn right around and lay at His feet.

Where’s your crown? Do you have that coming? Remember, it’s His righteousness, not yours, that earns you that crown as a believer. Let me encourage you today to be, know and do right in God’s eyes. That is His definition of righteousness. If I am pleasing the Father, if you are pleasing the Father, that’s all that matters.

I will live to please You today, O God. Righteous living is godly living. Righteous living will be rewarded and for that I am grateful.

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Child Raising, Child Rearing, Christianity, Completeness, Direction, Disciplemaking, Encouragement, Eternity, Faith, Faithfulness, Fighting, Holy Spirit, Obedience, Parenting, Testimony

THREE GOOD F’S

2 TIMOTHY 4:7

“I have fought the good fight, I have finished the course, I have kept the faith;”

Most of the time when you hear someone has three F’s you think failure. But not this time. Paul has “fought,” “finished,” and remained “faithful.” Those are three awesome F’s. First, he fought the good fight. Both the verb “fought,” and the noun “fight” come from the same Greek word from which we get the word “agony.” It means to strive as if in an athletic contest or a battle.

He finished the course. The word for “finished” has the word picture of the old pirate’s scope that unfolds to complete it for use. It reaches an end. And “course” is a race. Paul has come to the end of his race. Finally, he kept the faith. He has guarded and protected the faith he has proclaimed. The most important thing about these three F’s is they are all in the perfect tense which means the action has lasting results. That’s cool.

APPLICATION

Ask your children if they think it’s okay to fight. If you have taught them well, they will probably say it isn’t. Then read them this verse and explain some fights are worth fighting. We have to be ready to defend our faith. Have they ever run a race? If so, they know the fulfillment of completing that course. All the energy expelled is worth it when they cross the finish line. One day they will experience that, if they are a believer, when they finish the race we are in as Christians. It’s a marathon, not a sprint.

And how do we teach them to guard the faith? By teaching them the truth of God’s Word. It’s not just a Sunday, feel-good book we read. It guides every decision they make. It is the truth above all truths. When they understand that, they will eagerly defend it against all attacks, thus defending their faith. The three F’s are still worth pursuing.

How’s your report card? Are you fighting, finishing and staying faithful? Sometimes we get tired in the fight. Don’t stop. The Lord is there to lift your hands. We get weary in the Christian race. Don’t throw in the towel. Keep your eyes on the finish line. And keep defending your faith against the enemy. Don’t give him an inch.

I will pursue these three F’s today. Above all I want to please You, O Lord my God. I know my efforts are strengthened through Your Spirit who indwells me, making all things possible.

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