Category Archives: Friends

Affection, Alone, Bible, Child Raising, Child Rearing, Christianity, Comfort, Disciplemaking, Encouragement, Evangelism, Faithfulness, Friends, Mentoring, Ministry, Modeling, Obedience, Parenting, Perseverance, Scripture, Testimony, Witnessing

MY STUFF

2 TIMOTHY 4:13

“When you come bring the cloak which I left at Troas with Carpus, and the books, especially the parchments.”

Paul was in prison, his last imprisonment, and like a lot of prisoners, was asking a friend to bring him a few things. From what I have read about his conditions, they weren’t too nice. He was basically in a hole in the ground, guarded around the clock. It was a damp, cold, uncomfortable cell. So, he wanted that cloak to stay warm.

But why the books and parchments? He wasn’t through writing and reading God’s Word. We don’t know what the books were, but I bet they were Greek fables. Paul didn’t have time to waste on mindless thoughts. His focus, even there, was presenting the Gospel. And the parchments? I suppose they were for more writing. Aren’t you glad Paul wrote his thirteen letters of the New Testament for us to read today?

APPLICATION

You are probably thinking, “How will you apply this verse, Carl?” Well, think about it. How much time and energy are you wasting right now? Paul didn’t spurn one moment. He was laser focused even in his last days to present the Gospel. Are you and your children doing the same? We may not be in a prison cell, but we are in the last days. Yep, I believe that. I believe every day could be our last, so bring me my cloak and books and parchments.

Explain to your children that we have a responsibility to take every opportunity we have to share the Word of God with the lost. Do they have lost friends? Make sure your children know how to share with them. Do they have a teacher who needs to hear about the Lord? Perhaps you can go with them to share. That would be cool – tag teaming with your child.

Just don’t waste these moments. Take full advantage of every day the Lord allows you to be here on planet earth. He has placed you here and brought you to salvation for one purpose. He wants to use you to spread His message of salvation to a lost and dying world. Will you do that? What do you need? A cloak? Some books? Some parchments? Ask and it will given.

O Lord My God, I know You will give me exactly what I need to accomplish Your mission. Give me the gumption and desire to fulfill all You have for me. I want to see many come to You.

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Affection, Bible, Child Raising, Child Rearing, Encouragement, Friends, Mentoring, Ministry, Modeling, Parenting, Testimony

WHATEVER YOU NEED

2 TIMOTHY 4:12

“But Tychicus I have sent to Ephesus.”

Have you ever had a friend who said, “Whatever you need”? And they mean it. You could call on them for anything, and they would be there. Tychicus was that type of friend. He is mentioned by name five times in the New Testament, once in Acts 20:4 and four other times in Paul’s letters (Ephesians 6:21; Colossians 2:7; today’s verse and Titus 3:12).

He was a faithful and beloved friend of Paul who is believed to have delivered the letters of Ephesians, Colossians and Philemon. He may have delivered 2 Corinthians. He was sent by Paul to Crete and Ephesians. Why am I telling you all this about Tychicus? Because we need faithful friends, and we need to be that type of faithful friend.

APPLICATION

Our children are going to have so many friends in their lifetime, but only a few like Tychicus. And the best way for them to have those kinds of friends is to be that type of friend. To be that kind of friend you have to have a motivation beyond your friendship. Tychicus wasn’t serving Paul. He was serving Jesus. So, how can your children serve Jesus by serving their friends? That makes them a Tychicus, not just doing nice things for them.

Of course, they will also learn to be like Tychicus by watching how you and your friends interact. As they observe your selfless love for others, they will begin to understand what that means. When you give up your time and resources to meet your friends’ needs, they will ask you questions. These are the times you can explain selfless love and commitment. What great teaching moments.

How are you doing with being a Tychicus today? Have you thanked your friends who are being Tychicus to you? I know I have several people in my life who I need to thank more for that. You may not think of Tychicus as being a major player in the New Testament, but Paul obviously trusted and loved him. One day we will meet him in eternity and get to hear the rest of the story. Will you serve the Lord that selflessly today?

Lord, it is not important that I am known for what I do for You or others. Help me to serve just to please You. Let me be a faithful friend to those who need me.

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Advice, Affection, Child Raising, Child Rearing, Cowardice, Encouragement, Faith, Faithfulness, Friends, Obedience, Parenting

WHEN FRIENDS DESERT

2 TIMOTHY 4:10

“for Demas, having loved this present world, has deserted me and gone to Thessalonica; Crescens has gone to Galatia, Titus to Dalmatia.”

Just who was Demas? Well, Paul mentions him in the letter to the Colossians and also in his letter to Philemon. In both of these references it appears he is serving and loving the Lord. But…then we come to today’s passage. Some time has passed. Something has happened.

Paul says he has “loved this present world.” We don’t know what that means. Whatever lured him was responsible for leading him away from his faith. He abandoned Paul while he was in prison. That word “deserted” literally means to leave in a lurch, to walk away from. How sad and hurtful for Paul.

APPLICATION

Your children are going to have friends desert them. They will have friends who pretend to be friends and all of a sudden turn turn their backs on them for someone else. That is going to hurt, and there is no way to protect them from this. However, read them this verse. This has been going on for a long time. Even in this verse, Paul did not speak evil of Demas. He simply stated what he had done. Paul obviously still loved Demas.

It’s more important that we teach our children not to be a Demas. We do not want them to abandon their friends. That’s hurtful. And we sure don’t want them to walk away from their faith. That would be catastrophic. Ask your kids what they think drew Demas away. Ask them if there is anything that could draw them away. Then pray for their commitment to friends and faith.

Are you a faithful friend? Are you committed to Christ whatever may come? Don’t be like Demas who ducked and ran when things got tough. He probably knew Paul was about to die and decided he was better off back in the world. That is never true. Stay committed. The Lord will see you through any challenge you face, no matter how daunting.

O Lord, I can’t do this without You. Remind me daily of Your sustaining power. I want to represent You well.

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Affection, Child Raising, Child Rearing, Comfort, Contentment, Friends, Love, Parenting

WRONG LOVE

2 TIMOTHY 3:4

“treacherous, reckless, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God,”

It is so easy to love the wrong things sometimes. It seems innocent enough and doesn’t really harm anyone else, or does it? The last phrase of today’s verse hit me hard – “rather than lovers of God.” I thought to myself, “Carl, what do you love more than God?” Of course, my first answer is nothing, but where do I spend my time and energy. Who or what do I rush to during the day?

We can be quick to criticize and judge these individuals Paul is describing to Timothy. They seem like horrible people. But we are just the same. We tend to love pleasure more than God. If we had to choose suffering for Jesus versus a cruise, what do you think we would choose. The phrase “lovers of God” is actually one Greek word only used right here. And the word for “love” is not agape, the word most associated with God’s love. It’s philos, which is a dearly, beloved friendship love. I like that.

APPLICATION

Does your child have friends that are true friends. Help your child make a list of all their friends. Next to each name have them write down why they are their friend. This may take some time, so be patient. I am sure each friend has their unique characteristics that have drawn your child to them.

Then ask your child if any of the friends will be around in five years, ten years, or twenty years. That’s hard to say, right? But we have a friend in Christ. We are to be “lovers of God.” God desires that deep, intimate relationship with us that lasts, not just for this lifetime, but for eternity. All the friends in the world could not make up for this one friendship.

Who or what are you loving? If you have as a priority anything besides God, you need to check out your love meter. Now, we can love a lot of things at the same time. That’s true. But nothing, and I mean nothing, should have a bigger share of our love than our heavenly Father. Will you refresh your love for Him today?

Lover of my soul, I praise You. You are always there. You never leave me or desert me. I am thankful for Your love in my life.

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Bible, Child Raising, Child Rearing, Commands, Disciplemaking, Encouragement, Faith, Family, Friends, Mentoring, Obedience, Parenting, Passion, Scripture, Witnessing

GENERATIONS

2 TIMOTHY 2:2 

“The things which you have heard from me in the presence of many witnesses, entrust these to faithful men who will be able to teach others also.”  

I’ve got a picture somewhere of five generations of my family. The picture includes my great grandmother Butler, my grandmother Willis, my dad, myself and my son. That’s rare today. I need to find that picture, lol. I am blessed to say that all five generations knew or know Jesus as their personal Savior. 

Today’s verse talks about generations. This verse means a lot to me. In fact, it’s my passion. Discipling other men is what drives me. It obviously was to Paul too. What you see here is Paul telling Timothy to keep passing the torch. Paul had mentored Timothy, and now he tells him to find faithful men to mentor himself who will also mentor others. Four generations of spiritual reproduction! 

APPLICATION 

Our children are the key to this generational hand off. If we do not teach our children the Word of God and instill in them the necessity to train their children, then the torch gets extinguished. The church is always only one generation away from extinction. Each successive generation must embrace and pass on their faith. 

Now I know God is bigger than us, but He still uses people to accomplish His will on earth. Don’t you want your children to be a part of His plan to reach all mankind with the Gospel? Well, it starts with you and then your children. They have to teach their children who will teach their children. Pass it along. 

Whom are you discipling or mentoring today? No one? Listen, dear brother and sister, you have to begin. God has given you the greatest gift. You must pass it on. Find someone you can invest in for eternity. There is no higher calling. 

Thank You, Lord, for sending people into my life to mentor me. Help me be as attentive to others around me who need to be mentored. 

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Child Raising, Child Rearing, Disciplemaking, Evangelism, Friends, God's Will, Parenting, Scripture, Surrender, Testimony, Witnessing

SEARCHING, SEARCHING

2 TIMOTHY 1:17 

“but when he was in Rome, he eagerly searched for me and found me—”  

Have you ever done a search for something? Of course, you have. It may have been your keys, your wallet, your purse, or, heaven forbid, your child. Sometimes the search can get frantic. You get nervous and run around like you are crazy. All you can think about is that lost item. 

Onesiphorus didn’t just look for Paul. He “eagerly searched” for him. This particular, Greek word for “eagerly” only occurs three times (Luke 7:4, here and Titus 3:13. It means to act speedingly or diligently. He didn’t waste any time. At this time, Paul was in his last imprisonment. Perhaps Onesiphorus knew time was short. He wanted to get to Paul before it was too late. 

APPLICATION 

I hate to sound like an alarmist, but time is short. We need to be searching for as many people as we can to bring them the Gospel. There is no time to waste. And as we are doing that, we need to be teaching our children to do the same. People, just like Paul, are in prison – the prison of sin. They are in chains.  

Just like Onesiphorus, we are to bring comfort and not be ashamed of those we reach out to. Is there someone in your family or your neighborhood for whom you are praying to receive Christ? Take your children with you to share the Gospel. Invite them over to dinner so they can see your family living out the Christ life.  But whatever you, don’t do nothing. 

Who reached out to you? Do you remember? Do you recall the joy you felt at hearing the good news for the first time? Don’t hold that to yourself. Seek out those around you are chained to sin with no hope of escape. Free them with the Gospel. 

Father God, You are the one who sends us to the lost. Show me whom You would have me go after. Give me the opportunity to to just be Jesus. 

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Advice, Affection, Bible, Child Raising, Child Rearing, Encouragement, Friends, Modeling, Parenting, Scripture

TRUE FRIENDS

2 TIMOTHY 1:16 

“The Lord grant mercy to the house of Onesiphorus, for he often refreshed me and was not ashamed of my chains;”  

Quick! You wake up in jail with your best friend. What is the first four words out of your mouth? Mine would be, “What did you do?” LOL. Seriously, do you have friends who would stick with you through tough times like Paul. Undoubtedly, Onesiphorus was one of those kinds of friends. He showed love to Paul when others may have shunned him. 

Paul didn’t forget that. He makes a point to mention him by name in this letter to Timothy. Do you think Onesiphorus ever thought his actions for Paul would land him in God’s Word for eternity? I bet not. He just loved Paul and did what the Lord told him to do. Shouldn’t we do the same? 

APPLICATION 

I have mentioned the importance of teaching our children how to be good friends several times in my devotional blogs. It seems the Word brings that up from time to time. Why is that important? Because we can’t do this life alone. Our children need to be a friend to others as much as they need friends in their life.  

There is not much sadder than a child with no friends. You can’t create them for them, but you can create the environment where they can develop friendships with others. Invite neighbors over for dinner. Allow them to have sleepovers. Get to know their friends’ parents. Friends can be friends forever, especially those of the household of faith. 

Whom do you have in your life right now that you can call for anything at any time? We all need that. I pray you have someone that close who would drop everything to come running in your time of need. Are you that kind of friend yourself? Be an Onesiphorus. Think about others. 

O Lord, thank You for those in my life whom are a Onesiphorus. I praise You for putting them in my life to help me walk this path of faith. I need them. 

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Child Raising, Child Rearing, Family, Friends, Heaven, Love, Ministry, Parenting

SAD FAREWELLS, SWEET REUNIONS

2 TIMOTHY 1:4 

“longing to see you, even as I recall your tears, so that I may be filled with joy.”  

Paul loved Timothy. Timothy loved Paul. If there was any doubt to that just look at today’s verse. At their last parting, Paul recalls Timothy’s tears when he left. They had spent many years together ministering and sharing the Gospel of Christ. I am sure they shared countless meals and walked hundreds of miles together. All those memories! 

So, now Paul is hoping to see Timothy again. We don’t know if he did or not. This letter and Paul’s letter to Titus are probably the last two letters Paul wrote before being martyred for Christ. True brothers in Christ, however, will never be separated by death. They live together forever in eternity. 

APPLICATION 

This may sound strange, but we need to teach our children how to say goodbye and hello properly. Yeah, I know. You are saying, “Carl, all parents do that. We teach them to blow kisses and wave.” That’s not what I am talking about. I am talking about understanding separation and reunion. 

The next time you travel to visit family, talk about how happy you are going to be to see them when you get there. Ask your children what’s the first thing they are going to do when they see Grandma or Grandpa. I bet they say, “Ask for candy.” Lol, maybe not. But I bet the answer involves hugs and kisses. Then ask them why. Because they love them, right. And when they leave, hugs and kisses are involved again.  

You see, the bond of family, blood or spiritual, involves tears, hugs, kisses and love. Whom do you want to see as much as Paul wanted to see Timothy? Why? Are they bound to you for eternity? Will you see them there? If not, why not invite them into your permanent family with Christ? 

Father, I want to invite all my loved ones to join me one day in heaven. Help me love them enough to make sure they are going. Loving them here is just not enough. 

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Advice, Bible, Bosses, Child Raising, Child Rearing, Commands, Family, Fatherhood, Friends, Mentoring, Ministry, Modeling, Motherhood, Obedience, Parenting, Scripture

DON’T TAKE ADVANTAGE

1 TIMOTHY 6:2

“Those who have believers as their masters must not be disrespectful to them because they are brethren, but must serve them all the more, because those who partake of the benefit are believers and beloved. Teach and preach these principles.”

This verse can be a little confusing. Let me try to break it down for you very simply. Paul is telling us that we should not disrespect our bosses by taking advantage of the fact they are believers. For instance, we shouldn’t use our common faith as an excuse to get special privileges. We shouldn’t show any less respect for them since we are “equals” in the eyes of the Lord.

You’ve seen people do that, I’m sure. I’ve even had people try to do that to me. It’s hard to keep that line between Christian brother and boss, especially if you are serving in full-time ministry. But God designed these roles for a reason. Being buddies with your boss may sound great, but it can lead to problems when he/she has to correct you.

APPLICATION

This is no more applicable than in our relationships with our children. We want to be close to our kids. We want them to consider us their friend and confidant. But we should never be their buddy. When we blur the lines between parent and friend, we open ourselves up to disrespect and misunderstandings. 

I’ve seen it too many times. Parents tell me they are best friends with their child. Your best friend should be our spouse, not your son or daughter. God designed the family to have roles. As parent, you are the authority over your child. Then you become an advocate and guide as they get older. But you are never designed to be their best friend. You can be a better friend by being a better parent.

You may disagree with me on this one. But the fact remains the same. We have God’s Word to guide us in all our relationships. So, don’t treat your boss like a buddy. That is disrespect. And don’t rely on your child for friendship. We are actually more than friends. We are family. That never ends.

I want to thank You, Lord, for allowing me to have close relationships with my parents. I also thank You for the friendships I have had in the workplace. Help me keep those relationships where they should be so we can follow Your guidelines.

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Advice, Child Raising, Child Rearing, Commands, Deception, Direction, Disciplemaking, Encouragement, Forgiveness, Friends, Gossip, Lies, Mentoring, Modeling, Obedience

YOU JUST CAN’T HIDE IT

1 TIMOTHY 5:25

“Likewise also, deeds that are good are quite evident, and those which are otherwise cannot be concealed.”

Have you ever tried to conceal a wrong? You messed up, you know it and now you are trying to hide it. Most of us have. Paul knew about wrong deeds. Remember his past? He had sought out and persecuted the believers. I am sure there were some things he did he wished he could have hidden. But he also knew that truth was the only way.

Paul is also warning us of the same. Some people’s good works are so evident. They may or may not want the attention for doing them, but the fact remains that did them. On the other hand, there are many who appear as good, yet try to conceal their true actions and motives. Paul is saying they will come out. Give it time.

APPLICATION

Teaching your little one to do good is something I am sure you are doing. We don’t have to teach them how to do bad stuff, do we? That comes naturally. And we know they are going to mess up. That’s unavoidable. What we must do, however, is teach them to own up to their mistakes, to confess, to make it right. Concealment only leads to bigger problems.

I can deal with just about any problem, but when someone outright lies to me, that’s hard to stomach. Trust is broke. Your children need to know that. And you need to be quick to deal with deception from your children. Quick and natural consequences are the key. Why? We want them to be truthful, even if it means they may suffer a consequence. 

So, how do you handle this yourself? Are you tempted to cover up your bad behaviors? Do you make excuses for your failures? Be upfront. Be honest. Take responsibility. Little ones are watching and listening. Let your good deeds be quite evident. Don’t be the one trying to conceal your wrong deeds.

O Lord, help me to be open and honest at all times. I represent You and want to draw all to you. Help me confess my wrongdoings and accept whatever consequence may come.

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