Category Archives: Family

Bible, Family, Husbands, Scripture, Subjection, Submission, Wives

GODLY SUBJECTION

COLOSSIANS 3:18

“Wives, be subject to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord.”

Boy, oh boy! This is not something you hear a lot today. Women subjecting themselves to their husbands? Are you kidding me? Aren’t we all equal? If you think about it, we are all subject to someone. I am subject to my boss. I am subject to the donors who support my ministry. I am subject to my church. I am subject, most of all, to God.

Paul discusses roles and relationships in the remainder of chapter 3. These verses are almost exactly what he wrote to the Ephesians in Ephesians chapters 5 and 6. Describing biblical roles in families is not sexist. It’s not chauvinistic. It’s not biased toward one person over another. It’s just the way God planned for us to function in families and communities.

APPLICATION

Men, before you get all high and mighty about this verse, ask yourself this question. Am I a man to whom a godly woman would want to subject herself to? Paul is going to the men in the next verse, so hang on. But we men need to prepare ourselves to be “subject worthy.”

In Ephesians 5:21-24, we read this, “21 and subject yourselves to one another in the fear of Christ. 22 Wives, subject yourselves to your own husbands, as to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the church, He Himself being the Savior of the body. 24 But as the church is subject to Christ, so also the wives ought to be to their husbands in everything.”

Most any God-fearing, God-loving woman would willingly submit herself to a man who is subjecting himself to Christ. That can be trusted. That’s a man whom she can feel secure in trusting. Do you know many men like that? I do. They love God much more than they love their wives. Wives really do love that. So, wives subject yourself to that kind of man.

Father, thank You that we can subject ourselves to You.

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Bible, Body, Family, Husbands, Scripture, Wives

ONE BODY

EPHESIANS 5:30

“because we are parts of His body.”

Have you ever been part of a group or club that was real close? I have had the privilege to have been parts of a couple of groups like that. One was a men’s Bible study group called “Bubba Land.” This group started out for men who loved the outdoors (hunting, fishing, hiking, etc). The name “Bubba” just kind of described this bunch of guys. But man, did we love each other! I could have called any one of those guys at any time for anything and they would have come running. Now that I live in Knoxville, I can’t be a part of that group anymore. Miss those guys!

The NASB translation leaves out part of the Greek text. Literally it reads, “for members we are of His body, of His flesh and of His bones.” That’s pretty descriptive. Of course, Paul is continuing to give the analogy of a husband and wife comparing them to Christ and the church. In Genesis 2:23 we hear Adam exclaim, “‘At last this is bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh; She shall be called “woman,” because she was taken out of man.’”

APPLICATION

We are called the “body of Christ” throughout the New Testament. 1 Corinthians 12:27 says, “Now you are Christ’s body, and individually parts of it.” In Romans 12:4-5, Paul says this right before he starts talking about spiritual gifts. “4 For just as we have many parts in one body and all the body’s parts do not have the same function, 5 so we, who are many, are one body in Christ, and individually parts of one another.” Yes, we are separate, but we make a whole.

In the same way, when a husband and wife come together in marriage, they cease to be separate entities. They are now one. Doesn’t it say a man should leave his parents and cleave to his wife? His body belongs to her, and her body belongs to him. They are physically, emotionally and spiritually joined together as one. How beautiful is that?

Unfortunately, our society gives us too much freedom to just walk away from our union with our spouse. We “fall out of love.” We “grow apart.” No, no, no! We are bound together. We have responsibilities for each other. Don’t let the world tell you how to love your husband or your wife. Go to God. He has the answers. You are one.

Thank You, Lord, for joining me with my wife and giving us a life together.

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Bible, Family, Husbands, Scripture, Subjection, Submission, Wives

THERE’S AN ORDER TO IT

EPHESIANS 5:23

“For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the church, He Himself being the Savior of the body.”

I like order. I like things in their place. I probably got that from my dad. He had a shop in the back of our house. In that shop was all kind of tools, wood, screws, nuts and bolts and a lot of other stuff he had collected over the years. But in that shop everything had its place.

God has an order to things, as we began to see in yesterday’s blog (check it out if you missed it). Father – Son (Jesus) – Husband – Wife. The Greek word for “head” used here means lord or ruler. Just as Jesus followed the lead of the Father, husbands are to follow Jesus, and the wife is to follow her husband. Again, as I said yesterday, this is God’s design, not mine. There is a purpose for everything God does, including the design for the home.

APPLICATION

Christ came to lead the church, to be the head of the church, but He was also the Savior of the body. He gave Himself freely to die on a cross for each and every believer. In the same way, husbands are to sacrifice themselves for their wives. Then and only then will the wives follow them and subject themselves. When a wife sees her husband making sacrifices for her, she is drawn to that. Some men sacrifice their hobbies (hunting, fishing, golfing) in order to spend more time with their wives and children. God will honor him for that sacrifice.

The “lordship” the husband has over his wife is never meant to be one of abuse or disadvantage. No, this lordship is only meant to show he is in control of himself and his family. His role as protector and priest of his household is key to the wife’s willingness to subject herself to his leadership. Remember, the comparison is to Christ. What an example!

Paul will continue his statements about the family for several verses. I would encourage you to read those verses (5:22-6:1) several times and ask the Lord what He would have you learn from His plan for the family. If your family does not look like these verses, pray and ask the Father what you need to do.

O Lord, help me be the husband/wife I need to be for my spouse.

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Bible, Family, God's Will, Husbands, Marriage, Scripture, Wives

WIVES AND THEIR HUSBANDS

EPHESIANS 5:22

“Wives, subject yourselves to your own husbands, as to the Lord.”

Ephesians 5:22-6:4 is a well-known passage about the roles of a family (wife, husband, child, father). I want to begin by saying that these are God’s words given to Paul through the Holy Spirit to pen for the Ephesians and future generations. You may not like all that is written here. Many people don’t. They claim these thoughts are outdated or irrelevant for today. But do I need to remind you that every single word in the Bible is inspired by God and is profitable? (2 Timothy 3:16-17) So, don’t get mad at me for what Paul is saying. Don’t get mad at Paul. He was just the messenger. Take it up with God.

Paul starts out these verses on family by instructing the wife. I mentioned in yesterday’s blog on 5:21 that some people don’t like the thought of women submitting or subjecting themselves to a man. Go back and read that blog for a further description about that word “subject.” I am not going to rehearse that thought today. Instead, I want you to look at some other verses God gives us on today’s subject. Before we do that, look at the last four words of today’s verse – “as to the Lord.” That is the parameter for the woman’s submission.

APPLICATION

I want to start this application with a quote from Barnes about this verse. Hang with me. It’s kind of long, but I think it is a great view of the text. “Where commands begin ‘in this relation,’ happiness usually ends; and the moment a husband ‘requires’ a wife to do anything, it is usually a signal of departing or departed affection and peace. When there are proper feelings in both parties in this relation there will be no occasion either to command or to obey. There should be such mutual love and confidence, that the known ‘wish’ of the husband should be a law to the wife: and that the known desires of the wife should be the rule which he would approve. A perfect government is that where the known wish of the lawgiver is a sufficient rule to the subject. Such is the government of heaven; and a family on earth should approximate as nearly as possible to that.”

That was pretty good, huh? It’s a mutual thing when it is done as the Lord commands. In 1 Corinthians 11:3, we read this, “But I want you to understand that Christ is the head of every man, and the man is the head of a woman, and God is the head of Christ.” The Lord gives us clear roles in family. They are not to be ignored, for when they are, chaos rules. For more on this, read verses 4-12 in 1 Corinthians 11.

The Lord spoke through Peter on this subject as well. In 1 Peter 3:1 it says, “In the same way, you wives, be subject to your own husbands so that even if any of them are disobedient to the word, they may be won over without a word by the behavior of their wives,.” The wife’s submission to her husband can be used by the Lord to win over an unbelieving husband.

Over in Titus 2:3-5, Paul gives these instructions to Titus for the church. “3 Older women likewise are to be reverent in their behavior, not malicious gossips nor enslaved to much wine, teaching what is good, 4 so that they may encourage the young to love their husbands, to love their children, 5 to be sensible, pure, workers at home, kind, being subject to their own husbands, so that the word of God will not be dishonored.”

I could go on and give you more passages on this subject of wives’ submission to their husbands, but I think you have the picture now. I encourage you to search the Scriptures yourself if you have doubts. Let the Lord correct you, not me. Do it all as to the Lord.

Father, I thank You for wives everywhere who see the benefits and rewards of following Your plan for the home.

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Bible, Family, Prayer, Scripture, Thanksgiving

GIVE THANKS FOR ALL

EPHESIANS 5:20

“always giving thanks for all things in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ to our God and Father;”

Here in the U.S., we are coming into the season of the year when we give thanks for our blessings. We even have a holiday called Thanksgiving Day when families and friends gather together for a huge feast. We don’t just stuff the turkey. We stuff ourselves, lol. You may go around your table and give thanks for each one sitting there. You may ask each person to share one thing for which they are grateful. We are thankful for a lot of things.

Paul is really continuing the thought from the previous few verses. Many scholars think the thought here is not about “things” but rather people. That seems to flow from the context. The Liturgy of the Episcopal church says, “We, thine unworthy servants, do give thee most humble and hearty thanks for thy goodness and loving-kindness to us, and to all men.” 1 Timothy 2:1 expresses a similar thought. “First of all, then, I urge that requests, prayers, intercession, and thanksgiving be made in behalf of all people,”

APPLICATION

So, instead of asking what are you thankful for, ask who are you thankful for. That’s easy for me. I am thankful for my family – for my wife, children, grandchildren, siblings, in-laws, uncles, aunts and cousins. I am thankful for men who have poured into me and friends who hold me accountable and encourage me in my walk.

Here’s a great verse for you on thanks. 1 Thessalonians 5:18 says, “in everything give thanks; for this is the will of God for you in Christ Jesus.” If you have ever struggled knowing God’s will for your life, here’s the answer. Just give thanks. That pleases Him. In fact, He wills it.

I love how Paul tells the Philippians how thankful he is for them. In Philippians 1:3-4 he says, “3 I thank my God in all my remembrance of you, 4 always offering prayer with joy in my every prayer for you all,” Paul not only gives thanks for them, but he also prays for them. We all need to practice that daily. Will you join me? Think of some people right now for whom you are thankful and gives thanks and lift them in prayer.

Father, today I am thankful for my wife. Will you fill her day with joy?

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Bible, Blessing, Calling, Family, Glory, Humility, Scripture, Service, Uncategorized

NAMESAKE

EPHESIANS 3:15

“from whom every family in heaven and on earth derives its name,”

My daughter and son-in-law gave me such a blessing a few weeks ago when our grandson was born. What was an even bigger blessing is they decided to name him Lucas Carl. He has my name. Why does that bless me? Well, I carry both of my grandfathers’ names – Carl Spence and Clarence William Willis. It’s kind of like carrying on the family name, in a way. Of course, my grandson has his dad’s last name (unless I can get him to change it, lol). Bearing someone’s name is an honor and privilege.

In today’s verse, Paul says all believers have their Father’s name. Now, he didn’t mean we all have to change our name to Jehovah. That would be kind of silly. What he meant was we are now all in the same family. We represent the Father. We are protected by the Father. This applies to all believers, alive or in heaven. We are all one big family.

APPLICATION

What does that mean for us? Well, first of all, it means we need to love each other. In John 13:34, Jesus tells us, “‘A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another, even as I have loved you, that you also love one another.’” How are you loving your fellow believer? Are you arguing about the color of the carpet in the sanctuary? How silly! We’re family.

Family means a lot of different things to people. Those who grew up in dysfunctional families can really struggle with the concept of family. They don’t understand that you can disagree and still love each other. Do you really think the disciples always got along? In Mark 10, we have a great story that I think illustrates this point. Remember when John and James asked Jesus if they could sit at his right and left in glory? Read the following and see what happened.

John 10:41-45 says, “41 Hearing this, the other ten began to feel indignant with James and John. 42 Calling them to Himself, Jesus said to them, ‘You know that those who are recognized as rulers of the Gentiles domineer over them; and their people in high position exercise authority over them. 43 But it is not this way among you; rather, whoever wants to become prominent among you shall be your servant; 44 and whoever wants to be first among you shall be slave of all. 45 For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give His life as a ransom for many.’”

So, love each other and serve each other. That’s what family does!

Thank You, Lord, for making me part of Your family.

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Bible, Compassion, Encouragement, Family, God's Will, Goodness, Kingdom, Love, Scripture

HOUSEHOLD OF FAITH 

GALATIANS 6:10 

“So then, while we have opportunity, let’s do good to all people, and especially to those who are of the household of the faith.” 

As a man, I am supposed to take care of my household. The Bible tells us that to not do that makes us worse than an unbeliever. But so many men neglect their families in so many ways. Oh, they may provide for them financially and physically, but they neglect the spiritual health of the wife and children.  

I believe Paul includes that in his encouragement to the Galatians in today’s verse. He says to do good to all people, “and especially to those who are of the household of the faith.” You see, Paul goes beyond just the man’s household. He includes the household of the faith. We should especially do good to our fellow believers. We are in the same family – God’s family.  

APPLICATION 

Let me speak to the men right now. Men, you have a responsibility to care for your family. You also have a responsibility to aid those in your church or fellowship who have a need. Is there a widow who needs her yard mowed? Is there a single mom who needs some men to do some home repairs? I can’t help but think about James 1:27. “Pure and undefiled religion in the sight of our God and Father is this: to visit orphans and widows in their distress, and to keep oneself unstained by the world.” 

In Ephesians 2:19, Paul says we believers are all part of God’s household. That word has the idea of an intimate relationship. If that is true, why wouldn’t we watch out for each other? Why wouldn’t we come to the aid of a brother or sister? Why wouldn’t we give to them freely and without expectation of repayment? 

Now, wait a minute, Carl. You’re getting a little carried away. Really. Let me challenge you to look around and do as the Lord leads you. Ask your pastor if there is a family in the church who has a need. Volunteer to help. He will be so excited to put you to work serving those who have needs. We can do this now. Don’t wait! 

Father, show me who You want me to invest in. I know there are many. 

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Accountability, Battles, Bible, Burdens, Comfort, Family, God's Will, Ministry, Obedience, Scripture

SO, YOU THINK YOU’RE SOMETHING

GALATIANS 6:3

“For if anyone thinks that he is something when he is nothing, he deceives himself.”

Ouch! This verse feels like Paul is stepping on my toes. How about you? We have all been there. We think we are better than someone else. We think we would have never fallen like that person did. Some of my hardest falls have been the result of overconfidence. I like what Doddridge says about this verse. “The worst part of the fraud falls on his own head.” Man, that stings.

Don’t forget that this verse immediately follows the verse about bearing each other’s burdens. This is why. Because you may wind up in the same fix and need help yourself. Paul is warning the Galatians against vanity – spiritual vanity. Oh, it was so easy for them to think they were better than others. They had arrived. They were above those who struggle. Paul is saying, “Not so fast! You too may need a hand down the road.”

APPLICATION

I am reminded of 1 Corinthians 10:12 where it says, “Now, when you think you are standing firm, be careful lest you fall.” We can never get overconfident, unless that overconfidence is in Jesus. He will never fail – NEVER! His promises are true. In Joshua 23, Joshua repeats a statement from chapter 21. He says in verse 14, “‘Now behold, today I am going the way of all the earth, and you know in all your hearts and in all your souls that not one word of all the good words which the LORD your God spoke concerning you has failed; they all have been fulfilled for you, not one of them has failed.’”

Those promises still hold true. He is a promise keeper to the end. Even the last words Jesus spoke on earth after His resurrection says this. In Matthew 28:20 we read, “…‘and behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age.’” So, when we fail (and we will), He is always there – to the end.

Let’s back up a minute to the previous verse since this is important to the context. We must bear one another’s burdens because we need each other. There will come a day when you fail and that brother or sister to whom you gave a helping hand will run to your aid. That is how the body works.

Thank You, Father, for the body of Christ that looks out for each other.

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Bible, Compassion, Family, Giving, God's Will, Love, Sacrifice, Scripture

WHATEVER THE COST

GALATIANS 4:15

“Where then is that sense of blessing you had? For I testify about you that, if possible, you would have torn out your eyes and given them to me.”

There are some people you would do anything for, right? I would literally lay down my life for my family. I would not hesitate. My family is that important to me. The question arises then – What would I be willing to do for a total stranger or even a friend? To be honest, I would probably think long and hard about my sacrifice for them. But what would Christ do? We know what He did – He died for them.

Paul, in today’s verse, is thanking the Galatians for their willingness to sacrifice for him. The expression “torn out your eyes” has been interpreted literally and figuratively. Some think this refers to an eye malady Paul suffered with since his conversion on the Damascus road (remember the scales that fell from his eyes after being struck blind). Others think Paul was just saying they would have given anything for him. Whatever is true, we know they were willing to give anything for Paul.

APPLICATION

We are told by Jesus Himself in John 15:13, “‘Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends.’” Do you think Jesus meant for us to literally lay down our lives or to sacrifice for others? Personally, I believe the latter. We have to count our lives as nothing and be willing to give no matter the cost. That’s what He did and expects us to do.

Paul discusses this topic briefly in Romans 5:7-8. “For one will scarcely die for a righteous person—though perhaps for a good person one would dare even to die— but God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” He admits that is hard for us to sacrifice for others, but God held nothing back.

During this Holy Week, reflect on the sacrifice of Jesus. His sacrifice for us was planned from the creation of the world – whatever the cost. God knew what it would take, and He gave it. We all probably know John 3:16. “For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son…” He gave! Therefore, we should give. We should be willing to sacrifice. Be like the Galatians in this regard. Sacrifice today for someone in the name of Jesus.

O Lord, I lay down my life today for my fellow believers.

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Accountability, Age, Bible, Enslavement, Family, Home, Maturity, Responsibilities, Scripture

A CHANGE OF POSITION

GALATIANS 4:7

“Therefore, you are no longer a slave, but a son; and if a son, then an heir through God.”

From time to time in life we have the opportunity to change positions. What do I mean by that? Well, we move from son to father to grandfather (which is the best, by the way). We may move from employee to employer. And for many young ladies, they may move from bridesmaid to bride. All significant changes. All involve a change in responsibilities. But they all also carry with them a change in how they are seen by others.

Paul goes through a progression in today’s verse – slave to son to heir. Of course, Paul is speaking in spiritual terms regarding each of these. We all were once a slave to sin, bound under the chains with no hope for freedom. But as believers in Jesus, we each became sons (or daughters) to our heavenly Father. We are in His family now. And as such, we are now heirs to all our Redeemer possesses. We are called joint-heirs with Christ in Romans 8:17.

APPLICATION

As I mentioned, with a change in position, comes responsibility. In each stage of my life, my responsibilities changed from son to father to grandfather. As a believer, I have responsibilities as part of this family. Billy Graham once said, “Our faith becomes stronger as we express it; a growing faith is a sharing faith.” Do you believe that? Look at these verses.

In Mark 16:15 Jesus said, “Go into all the world and preach the gospel to all creation.” Paul told Philemon in his letter to him (v. 6), “and I pray that the sharing of your faith may become effective for the full knowledge of every good thing that is in us for the sake of Christ.” One more. Peter tells us in 1 Peter 3:15-16, “But in your hearts revere Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect, keeping a clear conscience, so that those who speak maliciously against your good behavior in Christ may be ashamed of their slander.”

One of our major responsibilities as believers is to share our faith, to tell others the good news. Will you do that today? Ask the Lord to give you one person to share with today. Ask the Lord to help you lead one person to Jesus today. Share the greatest story ever told. Share how He has changed your life. Do that today.

O Lord, I go so many days without sharing my faith. Give me someone today to talk to about Jesus.

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