Category Archives: Advice

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ALL WE NEED IS LOVE

1 TIMOTHY 1:5

“But the goal of our instruction is love from a pure heart and a good conscience and a sincere faith.” 

The line from the Beatle’s song just jumped off the page to me when I read this verse. Now, before you excommunicate me for doing that (lol), let me try to explain. I am NOT implying that the Beatles got the inspiration for their song from this verse. Paul is reminding Timothy, that in the midst of all his instructing, don’t forget love.

Have you ever had a teacher you just loved? I bet you loved them because you felt they loved teaching, right? They loved seeing students “get it.” They loved passing on the knowledge they had gained. And Paul gives some qualifiers – pure heart, good conscience and sincere faith. In other words, you can’t fake this kind of teaching. It all comes down to love.

APPLICATION

Why do you teach your children? Because you love them. You want them to be prepared to face life head on with confidence. If you lied to them as you taught them, what good would that do? You teach them with a pure heart, don’t you? Your conscience is clear as you give them the house rules. And, of course, your faith must be pure for you to pass it on.

Children will be crushed if they find out later that all you have taught them is false. They will struggle with life questions if your teaching has all been based lies. That’s why it is important (spoiler alert) that you be truthful about things such as Santa Claus, the Tooth Fairy and the Easter Bunny. If they find out (and they will) these things weren’t real, you can actually put doubt in their minds about all you have taught them about Jesus, whom they also cannot see.

How do you teach? Let me encourage you to evaluate your motivation for teaching anyone. It should never be to JUST pass on knowledge. Knowledge in itself will never transform. The purpose of knowledge and the application of it has the potential to change everything. Will you be that kind of teacher?

Father God, You are the perfect teacher. All You give is pure, good and sincere. Teach me to teach just like You.

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STUPID QUESTIONS

1 TIMOTHY 1:4

“nor to pay attention to myths and endless genealogies, which give rise to mere speculation rather than furthering the administration of God which is by faith.” 

You have probably heard the expression, “There are no stupid questions, just stupid answers.” Well, I beg to differ. I have heard some stupid questions in my life, none of which need to be repeated. And here, in today’s verse, we find Paul saying the same thing. When he writes “mere speculation” that really means “meaningless questions.” They serve no purpose. They are a waste of time.

Timothy was being bombarded, or at least it seems, with silly questions about faith. Paul is telling him to stick with the facts. He needed to remain true to the teachings and not allow anyone to cause him to chase rabbits. Nor should he allow others to do the same. It was a waste of time, and Paul wasn’t one to do that. 

APPLICATION

Now, when I say I have heard some stupid questions, I am not referring to the inquisitive questions asked by children. They are usually just seeking to learn something. And even when they may ask a silly question, it is all in fun and not to try to confuse or deceive anyone.  I enjoy children’s questions because many times it forces me to think a little more.

Don’t ignore your children’s questions. To the best of your ability, answer them. And when you can’t, find the answer. Asking the right questions can lead us to discover new truths. Asking questions gives us the ability to tap into the knowledge of others. But, as in all things, our questions should drive us toward truth and not falsehoods.

Let me ask you a question (not a silly one). Do you ask stupid questions? Do you ask questions that really have no purpose? The next time you start to ask a question pause and think about why you are asking it. You may be started to realize that you really don’t need to ask it. Do you really want to know the answer? Hmmm.

Father, I seek Your wisdom. Let my questions of faith and spiritual growth always be asked in the spirit of seeking You. Give me the wisdom to answer others as You would.

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YOU ARE THE AUTHORITY

1 TIMOTHY 1:3

“As I urged you upon my departure for Macedonia, remain on at Ephesus so that you may instruct certain men not to teach strange doctrines,” 

In the over three decades I spent working in the Child Welfare field, one constant was teaching the direct care staff (the ones who lived with and supervised the children) that no matter what a child said or did, they were still the authority. Only I, their supervisor, could change that. But so many of them got into power struggles with the children and unknowingly relinquished their authority.

Paul is warning Timothy here. He tells him to “instruct certain men not to teach strange doctrine.” But that word “instruct” does not give us the full picture. The word means to give a command with all the authority that comes with that command. In other words, Paul was telling Timothy to take charge and command these individuals to stop teaching that stuff.

APPLICATION

One of the joys of parenting is teaching our children to take charge of something. There are no natural born leaders. Leaders are developed and molded by others in their lives. We have the privilege as parents to mold our children into leaders. We get to impact, not only their lives, but the countless number of people they will influence one day.

Developing leaders is challenging because it involves allowing them to make mistakes. We learn from our mistakes. Your children will learn from their mistakes. The key is for you to be there to help them when they do. Help them see where they failed and how to avoid that the next time. Little Johnny may not appreciate it now, but he will later when he faces the exact same challenge and knows how to respond.

By whose authority do you act? Are you an authority figure? Just about everyone I know is in some aspect of life. You may not be the CEO of a company or a plant supervisor. But you may be a Sunday School teacher or an AWANA leader. Take your authority seriously. Allow the Lord to use you to lead others.

Make me into the kind of leader you want me to be. Give me the boldness to confront those who are leading wrongly. Let me show them how You want them to lead.

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Advice, Affection, Bible, Child Raising, Child Rearing, Christianity, Comfort, Disciplemaking, Encouragement, Friends, God's Will, Inspirational, Love, Mentoring, Ministry, Modeling, Parenting, Prayer, Scripture

DEAR CHILD

1 TIMOTHY 1:2

“To Timothy, my true child in the faith: Grace, mercy andpeace from God the Father and Christ Jesus our Lord.”

When I hear that expression, “Dear Child,” I can’t help but think of how we use that in the South. One may say it and shake their head, as if to say, “I just don’t know about that child.” Or it could be used as you hold a child affectionately in your arms and whisper, “Dear Child.”  I prefer the latter, and that is exactly the intent of Paul here when he uses the word “true.”

He is the only writer in the New Testament to use this Greek word and only four times. Twice he uses it to refer to groups of people (Corinthians and Philippians). The other two times it is calling a person true. We see it here as he addresses Timothy, and then we see it again in Titus 1:4 as he calls Titus the same thing. It was a special, affectionate relationship.

APPLICATION

I am sure I don’t have to guess how you feel about your children. You would call them dear, for sure. But Paul wasn’t talking to his natural children. He was talking to others he had invested in. He, through their time together, considered them true children or true friends.  Your children are going to need some true friends as they navigate this life.

How do you make true friends? By being one yourself. There are a few people in my life right now whom I would call true friends. I could honestly look at them and say, “Dear child.” I have poured into them. I have invested in them, and they in me. Model that for your children. Show them what it looks like to have true friends. Show them by your behavior what it means to BE a true friend.

Dear child of God, do you hear this message today. God has made you His child when you surrender to His Son. Now, He wants you to share that with someone else. Ask Him who He wants you to invest in. He will show you exactly who that is. Why? Because as you invest in others, you are growing and becoming more like His Son, Jesus.

I want to show others the intimacy they can have in Christ. Help me to invest the time and energy necessary to make others “true children.” 

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PENMANSHP

2 THESSALONIANS 3:17

“I, Paul, write this greeting with my own hand, and this is a distinguishing mark in every letter; this is the way I write.” 

Who would have thought the Scriptures would talk about penmanship, but here it is. However, Paul is not talking about his writing skills (or lack of). He is reassuring the Thessalonians that this letter was authentic, that it was from him. People were constantly trying to add to the message of the cross or in some way confuse the early believers. Paul is making sure they know he wrote this letter.

This verse speaks to us today as much as it did to the Thessalonians back in the 1stCentury. We have to be just as careful of what we read and believe. In fact, we have to be more careful. With the existence of the internet, we can be exposed to a ton of false information that is written as the truth. We have to make sure that what we are taking as the truth is really the truth.

APPLICATION

You need to warn your children to check out any information they get from friends about God with the Bible. People have strange doctrines and can easily lead a child away from the faith by offering something less “demanding” or less “restrictive.” After all, what child doesn’t want less rules. 

We may not be able to match the penmanship to ensure authenticity, but we can sure match it up with God’s Word. His Word is only truth. Anything, and I mean anything, that conflicts with that is not of Him. Tell your children to run as fast as they can away from those lies and untruths.

Are you a diligent reader? Are you careful about what you read? Let me encourage you to authenticate the penmanship. Make sure you know who is writing what you are reading. Know their doctrinal beliefs. Know their teachings. Don’t believe something just because it sounds good. Check it out.

O Lord, I am so thankful I have Your Word to verify what I hear and see. I know I can always depend on that to be truth and to guide me on the right path. Open my eyes to those who would seek to deceive.

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A NEW DIRECTION

2 THESSALONIANS 3:16

“Now may the Lord of peace Himself continually grant you peace in every circumstance. The Lord be with you all!”

I just love how the meaning of a verse can take a whole new look when you dig into the meaning of the words in the original language. Before you say, “Easy for you, Carl,” let me tell you how easy it is. There are tons of online sources where you can dig deeper. You just have to decide you really want to do that. Let me show you how important this is in today’s verse.

The word “circumstance” in the verse will certainly cause you to think about your life. At the initial reading in English the verse seems to imply that Paul is praying for the Thessalonians to have the peace of God in every situation. But no!!! The word actually means “the new course of conduct someone has because of knowing Christ as Lord.” Doesn’t that change everything?

APPLICATION

Let me explain. You would not ask God to bless your child in their wayward decisions, would you? You want them to choose the right path, no matter how difficult it might be. Then you pray for God’s peace on that journey. That’s what Paul is saying in today’s verse. He is saying, “May God give you His peace as you follow His direction.”

Do your children always choose the right path? If they do, I want to know how you did that. Children mess up. Adults mess up. Sometimes we mess up because we want to take the easy way rather than the right way. Choosing the easy way can get us into a whole world of hurt very quickly. And although the right path may be painful, the end result is peace with God.

What journey are you on right now? Is it the easy path or the right path? Sometimes the Lord will bless us with easy decisions, with easy paths. But other times, we wonder if He knows what He is doing. Right? I’m just being honest. But trust Him. He always knows what He is doing. He always will put us on the right path. And He always delivers what He promises – His peace.

I am thankful Lord that You trust me enough to put me on the difficult journey. I may gripe and complain, but You are always on my side. Help me show others the value in following You.

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TIRED OF BEING GOOD

2 THESSALONIANS 3:13

“But as for you, brethren, do not grow weary of doing good.”

If you know me personally, you know I spent over 30 years of my 40+ years of ministry serving in the Child Welfare environment. I served in various capacities at several Children’s Homes. So many of the children I worked with would start learning how to handle their own behavior and make progress in school and home. But most of them would reach a point when they would regress to previous bad behavior. When asked why, they would say, “I am just tired of being good.”

That may sound like a cop out, but until they learned the truth of the Gospel, they were doomed to repeat this roller coaster of good behavior and bad behavior. Once they learned they didn’t have to be good and to allow Christ to live through them, they began to stabilize their behavior. They weren’t always good, but they recognized it was all about surrender.

APPLICATION

Don’t teach your children to be good. Yes, you read that right. Don’t teach them to behave. Teach them, instead, to trust the only Good One. When our children learn to depend solely on Christ, behaviors will improve. When they learn to follow Christ’s example of selfless living, they will put others first. 

You can’t teach goodness. You have to live it out. You have to experience life. Your children will have ample opportunities to “be good.” But nothing they can do will ever make them good. Only Christ can do that.

Are you pointing others to Jesus by your “goodness”? Are you allowing Christ to live in and through you? Apart from Him you have absolutely no goodness in you. You might be morally good. You might treat others nicely. But there is no goodness in you. We are simply sinners, saved by grace. Let His goodness lead you to do good works.

O Lord, I am so grateful that I don’t have to do good works to achieve my “goodness.” I recognize that no amount of deeds on my part will achieve that. Only You can make me “good” in Your sight.

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BUSYBODIES

2 THESSALONIANS 3:11

“For we hear that some among you are leading an undisciplined life, doing no work at all, but acting like busybodies.” 

A busy body sounds good, doesn’t it? After all, we want to stay busy and not be idle. But that is NOT what this word means. The Greek word for “busybody” is only used here in this verse. It means to work all-around or to meddle. This person goes where they don’t belong. They fixate on what others are doing, instead of doing what they are supposed to be doing.

In other words, Paul is rebuking these people. He is basically saying, “You need to get busy and mind your own business.” Have you ever been guilty of that? Have you ever had someone in your life like that? I think we can all relate in one way or the other. 

APPLICATION

Your little Johnny may come home from school saying, “You won’t believe what Jimmy did today.” Then he proceeds to go into this long story about Jimmy. You are quite amazed at all the details he knows. When you inquire how he knows all this, he tells you how all the other kids are talking.

What a perfect opportunity to use this verse. Children need to know how to avoid this trap. It is so easy to get caught in it. People like to talk, especially about others. But being a busybody can be so much fun. We think we are even helping sometimes. But this is never good. It is never Christlike. It is never building up the other person, which is what we should be trying to do.

Are you guilty of this? Do you find yourself pulled into these kinds of conversations? Stop it! Paulis very clear. We are to have no part of this. Are you willing to listen and obey a clear command? I pray you are. Instead of being a busybody, just get busy for Jesus.

Forgive me, Father, for being a busybody at times. Forgive me for thinking I know best. Help me direct my energy and focus on others who truly do need my help.

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BUT I’M HUNGRY


2 THESSALONIANS 3:10

“For even when we were with you, we used to give you this order: if anyone is not willing to work, then he is not to eat, either.” 

Have you ever been hungry? I mean, really hungry? I can’t say I have ever been starved for food. I have had an occasional hunger pain, but I have never known real hunger. I believe, though, that if I did, I would do anything I could to get some food. Not the people in this verse. They wanted to be “taken care of.” Paul did not like that and let them know it.

I am not telling you that you shouldn’t help someone in need. But it is clear from this verse that you shouldn’t enable someone who could work but had rather beg. You probably see it all the time. It seems less and less people really want to work. They want someone else to work and then ask them for help. Don’t help them be dependent. Do all you can to assist them in finding a way to provide for themselves.

APPLICATION

This is an easy one for parents. Don’t give your child everything they want. Let them earn it. I don’t believe in allowance for children, unless they are earning that money by helping with the household chores. As part of the family, they have an obligation to help. 

Now, you can’t withhold food. That would be child abuse. But you can withhold other things they desire. Remember, you are not raising children. You are raising child raisers. You are giving them instructions that will be passed down to your grandchildren. You are influencing the coming generations in the way you teach your children now.

Do you have a strong work ethic? Boy, my dad sure taught me to work. There was no choice. I got a job as soon as I could. I bought my first car with money I earned mowing grass. I am thankful my parents taught me that lesson. Are you teaching that? If not, start now.

Father, I know that everything I have is because of You, not my sweat. But I am thankful that You have given me the strength to work and earn. Help me pass on that privilege to others.

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BE A MODEL


2 THESSALONIANS 3:9

“not because we do not have the right to this, but in order to offer ourselves as a model for you, so that you would follow our example.” 

Before you start freaking out about my title today, let me explain. I am NOT telling you to be a fashion model or a swimsuit model. You may want to do that, but that is not what I am referring to in today’s verse. Paul is telling the Thessalonians that he and his companions were examples or models of Christ. He wanted them to only see Jesus in them.

I was told recently by someone that they could tell just by watching me that I was a nice person. They observed this in me not through conversation or interaction. They came to that conclusion by the way I was behaving and interacting with others. I was quite humbled and was very glad I had behaved myself, lol. But our goal should always be to model Christ, so that others would be drawn to Him, not us.

APPLICATION

Well, here we are again. The best way for us to teach our children this truth is to MODEL it ourselves. We have to live it for them to see it. We have to look like Jesus. I don’t mean to grow out your hair and wear a robe. I mean to treat others as Christ would. I mean to parent your child as Christ would. I mean to live and act like Jesus. Be a model of Christ to them.

As we do that our children learn to model Him too. They have to have an example to follow. What better example than Jesus? If your children can learn this truth at an early age, they will avoid a lot of heartaches because of the way they interact with others. Modeling Jesus isn’t easy, but it is the best way to live your life. 

“But Carl, I have blown it so many times.” That’s okay. Start fresh. Begin today to change your appearance. Be a model of Him for others to follow. Make sure when others point out your “specialness” that you point it right back to Him. It is only through Him that you can begin to look and act like Him. 

I want to look like Jesus, Father. I want others to see Him in me. Help me today to share the gospel and, if necessary, to use words.

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